Strictly Forbidden
by LadyLush
Summary: Twenty two year old James Potter left the fame and fortune of quidditch to be hogwarts's transfiguration professor for the year. will it be just work or will a certain redheaded professor Evans make the year a lot more interesting. Read n review plz
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: i own nothing apart from the charcters that i made up

Chapter one

Professor James Harold Darwin Potter sat nervously at his new desk and twiddled his thumbs in anticipation. Today was his first day as Hogwarts's transfiguration professor. Professor McGonagall, the usual transfiguration professor, had decided to have a much earned and needed year off. Apparently she had gone on an around the world trip. James chuckled as he tried to imagine the stern McGonagall in a sunhat perched on her and cocktail in hand on some exotic beach somewhere. He had always thought that McGonagall never stopped working. She had worked at the school for, he thought, forever. She had been his professor and head of house when he attended school, which was a good five years ago. And now he was going to be doing her job for the year. It seemed unreal to him. It would certainly be a big change from his usual life.

The charming, attractive, messy raven haired, bespectacled, very in shape James Potter had previously been England's number one chaser and for the past two years he had even been the captain. He loved quidditch but he needed a break. He had three reasons for needing a break. Of course one of them was because McGonagall was going away and recommended him highly for the job as he had excelled highly in transfiguration when at school. The second reason being he was getting tired of all the fame and attention. Yep you heard it. James Potter was sick of attention. He didn't mind people, like fans, talking to him or admiring him. Being a marauder he was used to that kind of attention. He supposed the numerous photo shoots he had done were ok. He never let them take nude ones though. He didn't mind taking his kit off. Just not to the whole world cause no doubt it would be on the front cover. His parents read magazines. Them seeing him like that would just be….errrrrr….too embarrassing. He'd never be able to go to his childhood home ever again. The one bit of the attention he certainly did not like was the constant nagging of The Daily Prophet for interviews and the fact that when he declined the offer they would just write false and incorrect ones instead. It angered him so much. Why couldn't they just leave their favourite hotshot quidditch player alone? The third reason was being that he had been injured quite badly during his last match in the quidditch world cup. Despite the fact that the Swedish seeker had caught the snitch England had still won the match and the cup. James had scored an outstanding 23 goals out of a total of 36 scored by all three chasers. One of the Swedish beaters had decided to avenge his team by sending quite a nasty curse at James whilst he was busy flying the victory lap. That was the first time he had ever fallen off his broom whilst playing professionally. A picture of his unconscious mangled body had been splashed across the front cover of every magazine and newspaper for days. Two months on and of course he was perfectly fit again. That is apart from a long thin curse scar that ran right across the bottom of his back. It ached occasionally but mostly it didn't affect him at all.

James glanced at the clock. He had one minute until the start of class. He stood up and wiped the board clean and wrote in his neat italic hand writing 'Professor.J.Potter'. He actually thought it pretty pointless as everyone knew who he was. He nervously ran a hand through the black mess that was his hair, making it its classic windswept style that girls just seemed to love, and rolled up the sleeves to his new white Italian silk shirt. The classroom filled within the next few minutes with his first class; seventh years.

Most of the guys were either sizing him up or looking in awe at their favourite quidditch player. The girls on the other hand were all staring at him with lustful eyes. James was used to it so he didn't even bat an eyelid.

"Right, good morning, I'm Professor Potter as you already probably know. I'm taking a year out of quidditch to cover McGonagall's classes. Oh and just a side note to all the Gryffindors in here, I wont be taking over McGonagall's duties as your head of year and I'm not sure which teacher is either," said James smiling, his usual confident charming self was kicking into action as he talked to his very first class. "I was unsure of what to teach you in your very first lesson with me so I thought we'd go over something you've already done in your sixth year. Everyone last year had fun laughing at other people when they'd tried to change their eyebrow colour and ended up accidentally blowing their eyebrows off." The class laughed as they remembered people practically running to the hospital wing for some hair growth ointment to rub on there non existent eyebrows. "Well today we're going to practice changing our hair colour with that spell instead of buying beauty potions. Although don't think that this will just be easier and save you money on potions girls because it doesn't look as natural with the spell and easier to notice the fakeness. Despite that it is wonderful just for streaks. Right enough discussion. You can either work in pairs or on your own I don't mind. At the end of the lesson I'll award twenty five points to the person with the hair that looks different but natural. And I don't just mean that it's brown. It could be bright green and look natural. Hair colour is made up of different shades not just one block of colour. Now I think I'll stop going on about hair colour because I'm starting to sound like a girl and it'll ruin my reputation." The class laughed once again and James grinned.

He sat down at his desk and watched his happy students laugh at each others outrageous hair colours. One boy thought he'd be clever by trying to make it multicoloured all at the same time. Of course it all went wrong and he turned his whole body multicoloured. The whole class laughed as the boys face went into shock horror. It was obvious to the James what kind of boy he was the moment he watched this happen. He was a show off without the brains, a flirter without the charms, and a snob without the money. He had to hold back a laugh at the poor student. Instead he lazily flicked his wand at the boy and the colours started to fade until they turned into the normal colours of his skin.

"If you want different colours then you have to do it one at a time or something like that happens," explained James to the rest of the class. "You look familiar anyway what's your name?" He asked the boy whose spell had gone wrong.

"Drake Longbottom, sir. I believe you know my older brother Frank and his new wife Alice."

"That's right. You do look like him when you look closely. How are Frank and Alice by the way?" James asked out of interest.

"They're both doing fine, sir. They've told me to tell you that you're welcome to come round to dinner anytime. They live in Hogsmeade now so they're quite close to Hogwarts."

"Thanks, tell them I say hi in your next letter to them."

"Yes professor."

James started addressing the rest of the class who had previously gone back to their work. "As it's your first lesson with me I'll be kind and not give you any homework today but you shouldn't expect your other professors to do the same. They're not as nice as me." James cracked award winning shiny white teeth smile and all the girls sighed as their hearts fluttered. "I did promise twenty five points to the person with the most natural looking hair. They go to the girl with the long purple hair. What's your house miss….?"

"Its Ravenclaw and my name's Aleesha Fleesham."

"Well done Aleesha. You seem to be good at transfiguration and you've now got lovely hair," smiled James. Aleesha beamed and all of her friends started to giggle in the way all girls can do. "There's ten minutes left until the bell goes so I want all of you to change your hair back to it original colour. Once you've done that you're free to go."

James watched them change their hair back to their original colour with no troubles. He expected them all too just go straight away but instead a group of boys and even a few girls came up to his desks with expectant faces.

"Sir, we all just wanted to know, what it is like to be the world's best chaser?" asked the most confident boy, he was tall with curly blonde hair and tanned skin. James knew in an instant that this boy was the confident boy of the class.

"Well it's great," chuckled James. "Well it was great. You get to play the sport that you love and you get paid a hell of a lot for it. You're instantly famous and everybody knows you. But the best thing is when you're getting cheered on by your fans. The fans, that no matter what you do; will still cheer and love you. It makes you feel special. If any of you want to become quidditch players then do it because you love the sport not because you want the fame or money. It's not worth it otherwise."

The group of students was drinking in every word he was saying and nodded their heads in wonder.

"What kind of curse was it that you were hit with?" asked a determined looking redhead from the middle of the cluster of students. James scrutinized her before answering. She reminded him from a girl he used to know from what seemed a past life time ago. Except the girl he was staring at now had big chocolate brown eyes instead of the glittering emerald eyes he remembered so well.

"The healers still aren't sure even at this point," explained James. "And to be brutally honest I really don't care. I'm alive and able to live a normal life still which is the most important thing. I take nothing for granted now, because of that though."

"Is it why you quit quidditch? Are you ever going to play again?" asked several of the people, they seemed quite desperate for answers.

"It's one of the reasons," said James whilst leaning back into his comfy black leather chair. "As for your second question, I don't know, I love quidditch but it is only a sport. There are so many more things I want to do with my life."

He would have continued answering the many questions that were being fired at him but someone at the door interrupted their little question time.

"You do realize that all of you are ten minutes late to your charms lesson!" shrieked an irritated voice the doorway. "I have every mind to give you all detention. I don't care whether it's your first day or not!"

"Please don't," insisted James. "It's my fault. I don't have a lesson now so I lost track of time with them Professor…?" He couldn't see her; he could tell it was her from the voice, a voice he could have sworn he had heard in before in distant memories. The students were blocking his view of her and vice versa.

"Professor Evans the charms teacher," She answered promptly. James's breath hitched in his throat. Lily? It couldn't be, could it? The students seemed to sense his confusion and split in to two so he could see the doorway clearly. She saw him before he saw her.

"James?" She whispered as they both just stared at each other. Both thought this was impossible. James gulped. She'd changed yet she was still the same since school. She was still the same Lily Evans but she looked older and had an air of authority about her. He had to admit it. She was hot. Then again, when it came to her, she always was in his eyes. She was wearing a tight navy pencil skirt that revealed her long shapely creamy coloured legs and a white blouse that showed off her much loved body. Her fiery red hair was flowing free in waves down her shoulders and back. Her make-up, as usual, was to perfection.

Her emerald eyes turned cold. James thought he saw a brief flash of hurt in them but in an instant it was gone and all that remained was emptiness. James was saddened by this deeply. Usually he could read her emotions through her eyes like an open book. But then again, fives years changes a lot of things.

"We'll talk later," promised Lily, with no emotion or tone. "Class come with me." She exited the room with all eyes on her. Especially teenage lustful ones. James could already tell that Professor Evans was a favourite among the male members of Hogwarts. The students followed behind her, still confused to what they had witnessed between their professors, leaving behind a Professor Potter banging his head on the desk repeatedly.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Of course by dinner the whole of Hogwarts knew about what had happened between the two professors. For some reason, gossip, spread like wild fire in these corridors. The sixth and seventh years remembered Lily and James from when they were students here. It had only been fives years ago after all. They knew all about the Marauders and how popular James was as the ringleader. They knew about how Lily was the rule abiding bookworm. And even more importantly they knew all about James's obsession for Lily. He would ask her out publicly at least once a day and she hated it. Lily Evans might have been rule abiding and quiet but when it came to James Potter she had quite the temper. The sixth years, however, don't remember the numerous fights, as when they were first years, Lily and James had both become heads and had both become what one might call civil towards each other.

James picked at his food whilst sitting at the head table. It felt weird sitting up here. He was used to sitting at the middle of the Gryffindor table with the rest of the Marauders. He missed them. He was used to having them around him all the time. He'd have to wait until Halloween to see them. And of course, his girlfriend, Gwen barker. He missed her as well but relieved at the same time. He loved her of course but it felt like she and the rest of the world, were pressuring him to propose to her. He supposed he'd do it after his year here. After all he did love her, he might as well.

He sighed and caught the attention of Lily. She glared at him before going back to her spaghetti bolognaise.

"What the hell did I do," muttered James stupidly as he ran a hand through his black mess of hair.

"Perhaps she's still angry about what happened five years ago," suggested Professor Dumbledore from beside him. James turned to face him. He didn't realize he had been heard; by the headmaster no less.

"Sirius had me drunk out of my head, sir," explained James with remorse on his handsome features. "I didn't know what I was doing. If someone told me to jump off a cliff in my birthday suit I probably would have done it."

The old headmaster chuckled and his periwinkle blue eyes twinkled with laughter.

"James, you were one of brightest students and no doubt an excellent teacher, but don't you think you should have the brains to tell her this and not me?" laughed Dumbledore. "I don't want conflict between two of my favourite professors. You've both got different lives and have both moved on, you can forget the past. I sincerely hope that you especially have moved on James. I like my professors to get on but I don't like to get too friendly, if you understand what I mean Professor Potter?"

James blushed at what the headmaster was suggesting between him and Lily. "Of course, Professor. I've got Gwen and I'm sure Lily must have someone special in her life as well. I wouldn't dream of anything more than civility between the two of us."

"That's exactly what I thought," smiled Dumbledore. "My, the house elves have out done themselves this dinner. Or perhaps it's because spaghetti bolognaise is my favourite."

"Perhaps," muttered James, going back to his food. He finished his food whilst continuing to glance up at Lily every so often. She was talking to Professor Sinistra, about something of which he couldn't hear. He smiled watching her. Her gorgeous green eyes were sparkling again and her face was filled with her radiant smile showing off her dazzling straight white teeth. She looked so happy. It was nice to see it. He hadn't seen her smile in five years. Lily had one of those smiles that could light up any room and cheer up the saddest person. It was contagious and addictive.

Dinner was finishing and students were leaving the great hall slowly. He saw Lily walking out and into the entrance hall, where many students were hanging out in groups trading wizard cards and catching up on gossip.

"Lily!" called out James, running after her. "Lily! Wait!"

Lily stopped and swiveled round to face him, her face lacking of any emotion.

"Yes?" she asked. "Is there anything you wanted Professor Potter?"

Students seemed to be listening on to the conversation, particularly the older ones.

"Yeah but she walked out of my life five years ago," smirked James, leaning against the banister.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Yeah and who's fault is that?" snapped Lily. "Who's the one who spent years pining after me? Who's the one that spent years annoying the hell out of me? Who's the one that when I finally agreed to go out with him, as I had thought he had finally changed, went out a week later and spent most of the night with some tart named Britney?"

James looked ashamed. "I was drunk. I didn't know what I was doing."

The two had got quite the audience now.

"James I, and practically everyone else we went to school with, know that you can hold your drink," yelled Lily. "You knew exactly what you were doing that night."

"No I didn't," shouted back James. "How come you always turn things into arguments?"

This however was the wrong thing to ask. Her eyes widened and turned a darker shade of green.

"Me? You're the one who's so infuriating."

"Oh you know its cause you want me," grinned James, with a twinkle in hazel eyes. "Why else would you still care what happened five years ago? After all, it was five years ago."

Lily was taken aback. Why did she care what happened?

"Stop it, stop it I know what you're trying to do," said Lily whilst poking at his chest hard. "You're using your Potter charms. What makes you think that I'd give in to them? And for your information I've moved on. I've found a boyfriend and believe me he is much better than you."

"I have no doubt about that," said James in mock seriously.

"I have!" insisted Lily. "And we're very happy together."

"You do know I've got a girlfriend so I really couldn't care less about your perfect little life Evans," said James smirking in the satisfaction of her shocked face.

"Good," nodded Lily. "Good. I won't have you annoying me all year. Although knowing you you'd lust after a person girlfriend or no girlfriend."

"You make me sound like a player," suggested James suspiciously, his hazel eyes no longer playful.

"It's what you are," scowled Lily, strands of her fiery red hair coming loose out of her bun, framing her flushed face. "It's what you'll always be."

"You don't know what you're talking about Evans," said James calmly. "All I wanted to do was to apologise for what my drunken self did five years ago. Lily, you need to get over yourself, did you expect me to be still in love with you or something."

James looked at her shocked, pretty, blushing face as he blew her a kiss and walked off. Lily was left watching him strutting off in the same confident manner he used to do when he was a student.

The students were watching her with gaping mouths. She got even more flustered.

"If you're not all gone in the next five minutes you'll all be serving a weeks detention!" shouted Lily at the students. They got the message and left in a hurried manner talking animatedly about the night's events. Lily groaned and stomped her foot before practically marching back to her office, shouting at any students she met on the way.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

It was now Halloween and James and Lily had not spoken properly since. In fact they were never in the same together except at dinner, and even then Lily would finish fast and then either go to the library or her sleeping quarters. James, of course, was not remotely fussed about this, it just made him smirk whenever she came into a room, saw him and left.

There was thing he was genuinely over the moon about and that was tonight's Halloween party. Every year the professors had the night off and celebrated the holiday at The Three Broomsticks in Hogsmeade. It was fancy dress obviously. Once in sixth year he and Sirius had decided to sneak out of school and gatecrash. It was a perfect idea. They were in costume so the teachers didn't have a clue who they were. He and Sirius really didn't want to go to the next one. Seeing professors loosen up and get lively was just…weird.

He smiled. Sirius, Remus and his Gwen would be going to the party as well. He hadn't seen them in two nearly two month. He was apart from his brothers and girlfriend and it killed him. He had made a commitment to the school though so he couldn't just leave to see them anytime he liked. Besides, Lily was here, even if she ran from the room when he entered it was good seeing her. After all, he did used to be madly in love with her….used to be.

"Alright then, for homework I want a three foot essay on how you become Animagi." Said James then all the fourth years groaned.

James laughed. "You should be thankful. When I was a student, Professor McGonagall made me write a four feet essay on it." The class laughed as James remembered his easiest piece of homework he had gotten from his old transfiguration. He had been studying on how to become one himself at the time.

"Oh and I hope you enjoy the Halloween feast tonight. I believe Hagrid has outdone himself on the pumpkins this year."

He got muttered replies as they all filed out of the classroom in a noisy and disorganized fashion. As that was the last lesson of the day he went down into the hall for the feast straight away. Most of the professors were already sat down, including Lily. The hall was soon filled up with noisy happy students. James thought the great hall looked magnificent. The candles floated within the gigantic pumpkins that Hagrid had grown. The pumpkins were so big that they could have probably fit at least three groan men in them. The students were suddenly quiet because their great headmaster, who was attired in his emerald coloured robes, stood up.

"Have a good feast and happy Halloween."

The students cheered as he sat down and the gleaming empty plates and dishes were all of a sudden filled with every sweet and dessert nameable. James loved Halloween. He had an incredibly sweet tooth what more could he say?

At eight o'clock the feast was over. The students went to their common rooms and the professors went to their rooms to get ready. James had thought long and hard about what to come as. He could of course come as a quidditch player but considering that had been his job less than three months ago he thought it a bit too uncreative. He had wanted to come as a vampire but Sirius said that he had already claimed that and they didn't want to come as the same. Remus had already claimed the pirate idea so that was out of the question. Instead he decided to go as Caesar. All he had to do was put on a toga and he was sorted. Sure, it would be breezy but he'd look totally hot in what would look like bed sheets.

Once he had finished getting ready he was stood in front of the full length mirror making the final touches. It was times like these that made him thankful he worked out. It showed off his muscular arms and half of his much defined chest and abs. His outfit showed quite a bit of leg too. He ran his hands through his hair leaving it messed up but sexy. It was show time.

Realising he was running late, it seemed the rest of the professors had already left. James entered one of the horseless carriages and made his way to Madame Rosmerta's. Once there, he could already here the noise of the party from outside.

The pub was packed with professors and other invited guests. As soon as he had entered, he was almost knocked down to the ground by Sirius and Remus. He hugged them back then stood back to inspect their outfits. Pirate Remus and Vampire Sirius. The looks suited them.

"I've missed you Prongs," said Sirius earnestly.

"I've missed you too Paddy," replied James with a grin. "You too Moony and I'm sorry for not being there on full moons."

"I've missed you like hell too James and its ok," admitted Remus smiling also. "I've been taking this potion stuff and Sirius can handle me on his own."

"Good, I hate leaving you like that."

"So how's Hogwarts, any hotties there," asked Sirius smirking.

"Sirius they're students!" cried James looking at his friend in disgust.

"Well the sixth and seventh years are of age," said Sirius matter-of-factly. James raised his eyebrows at him. "Well there could be a hot professor there." He finished looking hopeful.

"Actually there is one," said James, in thought.

"Who?" asked Remus.

James didn't need to answer. Lily had just entered the pub and as they were stood directly near the door they were right in front of her. James was looking at her in awe. She looked…gorgeous. She was wearing what looked like a bikini top but it wasn't. James couldn't really describe what it was. He would call it a pink jewel encrusted bra but he knew it would probably have some kind of name. How would he know? He wasn't a girl. What ever it was, he loved it. It showed off all her creamy white skin, perfect flat stomach, and James had to admit sheepishly, perfect cleavage. She was also attired in light pink, silk, floaty trousers and little gold pumps. On each wrist she had a big thick gold bangle on that went a third of the way up her lower arm on each arm. Her fiery red hair was loose in curls that cascaded down her back. The look was complete with a gold alice-band around her head, shiny gold eye shadow, black eyeliner and mascara, and luscious clear lip-gloss. She looked incredible.

"You can tell your mouth to close Potter," she said confidently, even though it was obvious she wasn't, she was blushing slightly and talking to the floor.

"Wow Evans you look hot," said Sirius, checking her out, not so subtly one might add.

"Thank you, the vampire look suits you," she said with a smile.

"And the-whatever-the-hell you are look definitely suits you. You should take your top off more often."

Her eyes widened and she was about to object to the disgusting sexual comment when James stepped in.

"Sirius stop being a pig. She hasn't taken her top off nor will she ever in front of you," said James, seriously. "Grow up, you've seen women in bikini tops before or whatever the hell kind of top that she's wearing. We've established that she looks gorgeous now we move on to a different subject. By the way, it's obvious what she's come as. She's a genie."

Lily smiled. He'd defended her and he actually knew what she had dressed as. She was impressed.

"Thank you James. Or should I say Caesar." She eyed him up and down and was very, very, very impressed by his body

James grinned. He was about to reply when a blonde latched herself onto his arm.

"Oh my god I haven't seen you in months!" she exclaimed. Before he could even say anything she had grabbed his head and pressed her lips to his passionately.

"Missed you too," he said panting, when they finally came up for breath. He could see Lily glaring out the corner of his eye. He finally had the chance to see what his girlfriend was wearing. She was wearing a tight white corset and the tiniest white shorts he had ever seen with white fish net tights and stilettos. Perched beautifully on her head of long glamorous blonde curls were some white bunny ears. "Lily this is my girlfriend Gwen."

"Pleased to meet you," said Lily in a sickly sweet tone that James knew full well was fake.

"You too," said Gwen in a sickly sweet tone that was just naturally her. "You know, I'm a model for Witch Weekly magazine, if you're interested I could get you a modeling job. You're certainly good looking enough. How tall are you without heels?"

"Around five foot five I think," stuttered Lily, shocked that a stranger, James's girlfriend none the less, wanted her to be a model.

"Hmmm, really you need to be at least five seven or five eight for modeling. But I'm sure they could use you for face shots or lingerie."

James spit out the drink he was drinking. "Gwen calm down, you've only just met her and you're turning her into a playboy model."

"Hey there's my princess." James looked up to see who had said that to find a blonde guy hugging Lily and pecking her on the cheek. "I've been looking for you." 

Lily smiled. "Ethan, this is a colleague of mine James Potter and his girlfriend Gwen. And these two used to go to school with me, Remus Lupin and Sirius Black. Guys this is Ethan Smith, my boyfriend."

Ethan shook everyone's hand, James's last of all. He had to rub his fingers after shaking his hand. James had a death grip.

"Come on Ethan let's dance," said Lily sweetly, taking his hand and leading him to the dance floor, walking directly past James on purpose. Before James had time to contemplate the feeling of jealously in him, Gwen had taking him by the arm and led him to the other end of the dance floor away from Lily.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

"Do I look good tonight sweetie?" asked Gwen, seductively, pressing herself against him as they danced.

"You look gorgeous," James whispered into her ear, holding her waist possessively. "I love your bunny costume."

"I'm sure you'd love it even more off of me," she said winking. "Put in a pile with your very sexy toga."

James grinned at the thought. It had, after all, been over two months since he had shared a bed with his girlfriend. Over two months since he had felt a warm body under his. He was a guy after all.

"I'm sure I would." 

"But we've got to stay at the party," said Gwen, twisting a strand of her platinum blonde hair around her finger. "It'd be rude to leave so soon. I'm off to get a drink. Why don't you dance with your friend Lily?"

She walked off to the bar, swaying her hips in a tantalizing way as she did so. Dance with Lily? She had to be kidding. He looked over to the side of the pub where Lily currently was. She was stood on her own with a butterbeer in hand, looking bored stiff out of her mind. Why she was bored was beyond him. She should have been dancing and having fun. He could see several guys eyeing up her body like a piece of meat, but then again, who could blame them? She looked stunning. Where was her perfect boyfriend though? He watched as some random guy came up to her and asked her to dance. This guy was using all his charm saying some cheesy chat up line. Lily was just nodded her head as though going long with what he was saying. Anyone but the fool who was chatting her up would have known she was being sarcastic. She shook her head and the guy walked off away from her. She sighed, looking even more miserable than before.

James walked up to her confidently and leaned against the wall beside her.

"Where's Evan?" he asked off handedly, facing straight forward not looking at her.

"It's Ethan and he went to talk to somebody," she replied determinedly. "What's it to you?"

"Oh nothing," He said, finally facing her. "I just wondered why he wasn't dancing with you. So why don't you put your butterbeer down and dance with me instead?"

"What makes you think I want to dance with you?" she scoffed.

"Nothing but it's got to be better than standing here sipping your non alcoholic drink."

She glared at him but none the less peeled herself off the wall and placed her drink down at a random table.

"Well come on then," sighed Lily irritably. "I thought we were going to dance."

"That we are," smirked James. When they had reached the dance floor he grinned as a slow song started playing. He placed his hands on her waist as she placed hers on his shoulders. His hands were touching her bare skin as the trousers she were wearing hanging low at the top of her hips. Her skin was hot to touch and he loved it. The skin on his shoulders tingled were her delicate hands were placed.

"So since when have you been with Edward then?" asked James as he twirled her around.

"His name is Ethan as you fully well know," snapped Lily. "I've been seeing him since Easter."

"That's nice," said James in a teasing manner. "Where did you meet Ethan?" he specifically emphasized the word Ethan.

"In the bookstore in Diagon Alley," said Lily, "I couldn't reach one of the books on the top shelf and he, being so sweet, went and got it for me."

"So sweet indeed," mocked James. He received a smack round the head from Lily.

"Where did you meet the airhead model, she certainly looks like your type?"

"She's not as stupid as she looks Lily," sighed James. Lily looked at him, eyebrows raised. "OK she's a bit dim witted at times but she's great fun. And how can you say stupid blondes are my type? You're definitely not a stupid blonde but you've been my type for years. Well you were my type anyways."

She looked into his hazel eyes. She saw flecks of gold in them and looked away from the intensity.

"I've got to go find Ethan." She pushed herself away from his grasp and ran into the midst of people on the dance floor and out of his eye sight. He grinned slightly as he watched her disappear into the crowds before going off to find Sirius and Remus.

"Were you just dancing with Evans?" asked Sirius, whilst checking out a busty brunette to the side of him.

"Yeah, she was stood there all alone so I thought I'd ask her to dance. Gwen told me to anyways," said James defensively.

"Speaking of Gwen," stepped in Remus. "She's your girlfriend. Not Lily. So don't start lusting over her again like you did when we were in Hogwarts."

"I'm not an immature lovesick teenage boy anymore Remus," glared James, before letting his features soften again. "I'm with Gwen now and I suppose I love her."

"You suppose you love her?!"

"Yeah, what's wrong with that?" asked James, an expression of confusion etched onto his handsome features.

"There's nothing wrong with loving her," said Sirius, as if he knew about everything to do with the matters of the heart. "It's just that you said you 'supposed' you loved her. That means you're unsure."

"I'm a man what more can I say?"

For the next few hours, James spent his time either dancing with Gwen or catching up with his fellow Marauders. He found it particularly amusing to hear about how Sirius set his own kitchen on fire."

"I meant to do it," insisted Sirius exasperatedly.

"Whatever you say Padfoot," laughed James, taking a drink of his firewhiskey. "You're never setting foot into my kitchen again."

"James, sweetie, I need to go soon," whispered Gwen into his ear.

"But its only-" he glanced down at his silver watch. "-eleven thirty. This party's going to go on until three, four in the morning. "Why do you have to go so soon?"

"I have to go around twelve because I'm up early for a photo shoot. So I need my beauty sleep. But I thought I'd tell you now, so we can have a little fun before I have to go." She replied softly, caressing his neck with her breath.

"Well what are we waiting for then? Let's go."

Half an hour later, a very satisfied looking James, departed one of the carriages, before holding his hand out to help his girlfriend, who looked equally satisfied, out as well.

"That is something I have definitely missed," grinned James as he straightened out his toga. Gwen winked at him and kissed him hard one last time.

"So you should. I've got to go now though babes. I guess we'll have to wait until Christmas for a repeat of events."

"I suppose so," said James looking glum. "I'll miss you, bye baby."

"Bye sexy Caesar," she said blowing him a kiss before she disapparated, most likely back to their apartment.

He was joined a minute later outside the pub by his slightly drunk best friends who were both accompanied with a girl each.

"We'll see you at Christmas, Prongsie boy, me and Moony have to leave to make sure these to gorgeous ladies get home safely," Sirius said winking.

"Yeah, bye, Prongs," added Remus in a drunken slur.

"This is the first time in about three months that I have seen my best mates and within a couple of hours they have ditched me for a pair of girls," muttered James as he watched them disparate.

He walked back into the party and up to the bar to get another drink. It was only then did he notice Lily slumped over the bar, with a glass of firewhiskey in hand and many empty ones around. He went and sat on the barstool next to her.

"Hey."

She looked up at him, only then becoming aware that he had sat there. Her eyes were red and puffy and her mascara had run down her face in black streaks. Her hair was messed up as though she had just woken up. She was obviously drunk and something had upset her greatly as Lily Evans never drank alcohol.

"What's the matter?" He asked concerned. He wrapped his arms around her as she collapsed in a fit of sobs.

"I-its Et-Ethan," she sobbed uncontrollably. "I w-w-walked in o-on him scr-screwing some b-blonde." She buried her heads into his chest.

"Sshhh its ok," soothed James, stroking her soft red hair. "He clearly isn't worth it darling. He doesn't deserve you if he cheated on you. He's stupid as well. I mean who would cheat on the most attractive girl in the room?"

She looked up at him and smiled.

"Come on, we need to get you back to Hogwarts. You're completely wasted," said James, taking charge, standing up. "Can you stand?"

"Of course I can" muttered Lily. She stood, wobbled, then fell over and burst out into a fit of giggles. "Woops!"

He looked down to the sight of Lily sprawled across the floor laughing hysterically. He sighed. This was going to be one long night. He reached down and placed one arm around her waist and the other under her knees. He lifted her up easily into the bridal style. Lily shrieked at the sudden change and wrapped her arms around his neck tightly.

"Don't worry," said James softly. "I'm not going to drop you I promise." She calmed down and rested her head against his hard chest in content.

"After the short carriage journey to Hogwarts, he was once again carrying Lily bridal style except this time through the corridors of Hogwarts, not knowing where he was going to go. He couldn't take her to her bedroom as they were protected with a password and he didn't know hers. Alternatively he couldn't just leave her in her office. He didn't think he could leave her alone at all. He'd have to take her to his bedroom.

"Hazel stag."

The door to his room swung open and he walked right through towards the queen-size four-poster bed and softly placed Lily on to it. He sat down next to her and watched her bounce up and down with joy on her pretty features. It made him smile as well.

"Hey, you should get some sleep you know," he said gently. "You're already going to be feeling severely bad. It won't help much if you haven't slept."

"But I'm not sleepy," pouted Lily. She looked adorable. Her cute bottom lip stuck out and her emerald eyes shone with total innocence. "I don't want sleep. I want you." His breath hitched in his throat. She was drunk, he told himself, she didn't mean what she was saying.

"No you don't Lily," sighed James. "You sleep in the bed and I'll camp out on the floor."

"I don't want to kick you out of your own bed," said Lily. Even drunk she still cared about other people. "I want you in it. With me. " Or perhaps she just wanted to get into his pants…toga.

"You're drunk."

"Please don't leave. Stay with me please," she pleaded, hugging him fierce.

"Alright I'll stay in the bed but just remember in the morning who was the one that wanted me to sleep in the bed."

"I promise."

He watched her lay down on her back. He sighed then repeated what she did. They were both just staring up at James's ceiling in silence doing nothing but lying down. That was until he felt someone tug at his toga. Lily had managed to shrug it off his shoulder so now his entire chest was bare.

"Lily, stop," he said warningly. She didn't stop. She started tracing his muscle with her fingers enticingly slow. It was becoming increasingly difficult to not just grab her and kiss her. Even when intoxicated she knew what buttons to press to turn him on. He almost whimpered when she started pressing her lips to his chest tenderly, slowly…seductively. She moved her lips slowly up his upper body until they reached his. At this point she was straddling his waist. Her face directly in front of him, the tips of their noses touching as strands of her wavy red hair tickled his face.

She kissed him so softly that their lips were barely touching but he certainly acknowledged them. The kiss got more intense and passionate as James began to lose himself and start running his hands up and down her body. It was only when he heard her moan that he fully realised what he was doing. Using very little strength, he flipped them over so he was on top, straddling her. He looked down at the beautiful woman underneath and sighed. If he was Sirius or probably any other man in this position, he would have shagged her by now. Her drunken innocent eyes looked up in confusion to why he had stopped.

"Lily we can't do this, you can't do this. I especially can't do this," said James lightly. She didn't argue back. "Lily? Lily?" He looked down at her face. Her now sleeping face. He sighed and kissed her forehead gingerly. He got up of her carefully and draped the quilt over her sleeping body, tucking her in gently. He removed his toga, leaving him in his boxers and conjured another blanket for himself. He lay back down on the bed beside her and layed on his side facing her. He tucked a loose strand of her hair that had fallen in front of her face behind her ear.

"Sweet dreams Lily," he whispered, before closing his eyes and drifting off to sleep himself.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

James snuggled deeper into his red velvet pillows as the suns rays poured through his windows. He sighed as he remembered what had happened last night. He just hoped she remembered that she came on to him and not the other way around otherwise she would kill him. He wasn't joking, he had faced her wrath a thousand times and it wasn't pretty. He turned his head to face her. She was fast asleep facing him. Her make up was still a mess from the previous night but had dried and her hair was in disarray. Her pink luscious lips were smiling in contentment. He looked down to see her arms around his bare torso and her chest rising steadily as she breathed against his. He slowly unwrapped her arms from around him and carefully got out of the bed without disturbing her. She didn't wake she just rolled over in her sleep. He let out a breath he didn't even realize he had been holding.

He grabbed a t-shirt that had been on the back of his chair and slipped it over his head. He went into his little kitchenette and searched through his cabinet for something. When he found what he was looking for he poured it into a glass and placed it on the counter. He waited until he heard noises in the bedroom before bringing the glass through.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" James asked Lily who was currently confused looking around the unfamiliar surroundings. She jumped when she heard James.

"Why am I in here?" she asked, completely ignoring his question. "What did you do to me?" she eyed him suspiciously.

"You're in here because you got totally drunk last night and I didn't want to leave you on your own," said James truthfully, sitting down on the edge of the bed. "Do you remember anything that happened last night?"

She looked at him warily. "I definitely remember finding Ethan with that blonde hag in the bathroom up against the sinks. Then I remember throwing my glass at him. After that I went to the bar to drown in my sorrows. Next my mind is blank up until waking up in your bed with all my clothes on thank god."

"I'm sorry about Ethan," said James sincerely.

Lily laughed. "Don't be. He was boring. I like books but I like to have conversations about other things as well. He was snobby and old fashioned. That and he was crap in bed."

"Now that's a bit harsh Miss Evans," smirked James. "Perhaps he just wasn't up to your pace of things."

"What exactly do you mean by that?" asked Lily, her eyes twinkling in mock offense and laughter.

"I'm saying that you're a tiger in bed," grinned James. Lily laughed and rolled her eyes. "I miss this.

"Miss what? Inquired Lily, looking confused.

"This," said James, gesturing the space between them. "Us. The laughter and the easiness between us. I don't want to fight with you anymore Lily, I'm sick of it. I want you in my life again as my friend. Our last year of Hogwarts was the best of my life. That's because you were my friend and you were actually talking to me. I got to know you and I want to get to know you again."

"I missed you too James you know I did," sighed Lily. "But you hurt me. Seeing you with that girl it was worse than catching Ethan with that blonde girl last night. I thought you loved me like you always said you did."

"Lily, you've got to believe me, I did love you," insisted James, running a hand through his messed up hair. "That night with that girl was a mistake. One that I couldn't help. I didn't even drink that much. The next day though I couldn't remember anything that had happened. Even after I'd drunk my hangover potion."

"What hangover potion?"

"This one," said James, handing the glass over to her. She stared at the purple liquid before sniffing it. She looked at him with a disgusted face. "I know it smells horrible but the queasiness and headaches you are undoubtedly feeling will be cured in an instant and it will make you remember the things you can't remember from last night."

She eyed him for a second as though figuring out whether or not he was being truthful. She pinched her nose and downed the drink in one. She smiled slightly at first because the illness had gone but then she got steadily and steadily more red.

"I'm going to take a guess and say you've remembered what you did last night."

She nodded and bit her lip.

"Hey it's ok Lily, you were drunk you didn't know what you were doing."

"Thank you James," said Lily sincerely, leaning over to kiss his cheek. "Any other guy in your position would have taken advantage of the situation. You're a gentleman at heart."

James smiled. "You know I'd never hurt or take advantage of you intentionally."

"Not intentionally," said Lily wistfully. "You still did intentional or not five years ago."

"Lily I've already said I don't remember anything that happened that night even after taking the potion."

"Potion," said Lily absentmindedly. "Do you have the list of ingredients of this hangover potion?"

"Yeah they're on the bottle," said James bemused. "I'll go and get it for you."

A minute later Lily was scanning through the back of the bottle. She looked thoughtful for a moment before breaking out into one of her radiant smiles.

"You weren't drunk that night," she exclaimed. "She'd spiked your drink with love potion. You were doing everything against your will."

"How the hell do you know all of this by reading the back of a hangover potion?" asked James perplexed.

"Well you said you couldn't remember which means either the potion was faulty or it had either been tampered with or reacted with something," explained Lily. "She couldn't have tampered with it as she didn't know you'd be taking it. These potions are rarely faulty. Unless of course it was out of date. But you use these things all the time and there's only one portion in a bottle so it couldn't have been. Which means you would have had to have another potion. A potion that has ingredients which react or cancel out the ones in this one. Also a potion that you hadn't taken willingly. Now, this potion contains lovage which is a medicinal plant. Unfortunately for you its effects get cancelled out by Ashwinder eggs which are found in most homemade love potions."

James was speechless. He'd done quite well in his potions NEWT but he wouldn't have been able to remember the reactions between ingredients even if you paid him.

"How do you remember all of that?"

"It's my job James," smiled Lily.

"You're a charms professor not a potions master."

"This is only my second year teaching. I was a healer before this and I needed to know stuff like that."

"You know what this means don't you?"

"What?"

"It means I didn't do anything wrong," proclaimed James. "I didn't cheat on you. In fact I was the victim in all of this."

"You're right," admitted Lily ruefully. "I'm sorry I didn't believe you. Wow it only took one little potion to break us apart."

"I always did hate potions," grinned James.

"That's because you hated the fact that Snape exceeded you in something."

"I could have easily beaten him in potions," said James, his hazel eyes twinkling. "I had to make an important decision though. Potions or a life. I chose a life."

Lily laughed. "Whatever you say darling."

"Are you mocking me?" said James, his eyes full of mischief.

Lily saw the look in his eyes. It was the one he got when he had conjured up the perfect prank.

"No, of course not. Me? Saying anything bad about Professor Potter? I don't think so."

"Well I think you have." He dived onto her and started tickling her, knowing full well it was her weakness.

She started squealing uncontrollably. "Stop! Please! I give up!"

"Not until you say 'James Potter is the sexiest wizard on the planet'."

"Never," squealed Lily, still trying to get him to stop him from tickling.

"Not until you say it," smirked James, enjoying the power he had just by tickling her.

"Fine! Just stop the tickling."

James stopped tormenting her. He was right on top of her on the bed. Their noses a couple of inches away from touching. Her breathing was rugged and her chest very noticeably was rising up and down. He'd only have to lean down just a bit and they'd be kissing.

"James Potter is the sexiest wizard on the planet," whispered Lily, staring into the intensity of his hazel eyes. He showed his emotions through his eyes and now they were showing desire. He couldn't remember who initiated it all he knew was that a second later they were both kissing each other hungrily with their hands freely roaming each other's bodies. It wasn't a gentle kiss it was a passionate, hungry almost angry kiss. After what seemed like only a few seconds but most likely minutes, they parted both in need of oxygen. James rolled off Lily onto his back where they both stared up at James's ceiling regaining their breath.

"Wow," breathed Lily.

"That shouldn't have happened."

"I know."

"I've got a girlfriend."

"I know."

"It was wrong."

"I know."

"That was some kiss though."

"Tell me about it."

James turned to lie on his side to look at her properly. Her lips were bruised and parted slightly. Her hair was even more disheveled than before. Her emerald eyes were burning with lust. He guessed he had the same look about him. She turned as well so they were both facing each other.

"We just had to get it out of our system," said Lily softly. "And now that we've done that we can be friends again and move on with our lives. I should go." She got out of the bed and stood up to leave.

"Wait," exclaimed James. He got up and started rummaging in the bottom of his wardrobe. He pulled out a silvery grey cloak. "You'll need this. It's an invisibility cloak. I know you probably don't want to be seen in your very revealing costume by a bunch of kids."

Lily smiled. "Thanks James. I'll see you at dinner." He placed the cloak over her shoulders and watched as she disappeared completely as she pulled it over her head.

"Bye Lily," James said gently as he saw the door appear to open by itself and close again. He traced his lips with his fingers and smiled as he went to get ready for the day.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

"Right has anyone managed to transfigure their animal into a goblet yet?" James asked his second years. No one answered. Looking around the room he saw varied results. Some hadn't managed to do anything at all. Some had ended up with hairy goblets and some had lovely shiny pewter goblets with tails. "Remember, clear pronunciation and the correct wand movements and it should work. Who can tell me the wand movements?"

A small girl with brown pigtails and freckles raised her hands. He pointed to her. "It's a sharp jabbing motion."

"Well done five points to Ravenclaw," smiled James. "First person to do it gets ten points. That means a goblet with no hair or tail or anything else related to animals."

He watched the class carry on attempting the spell. It was a tricky spell for a second year but definitely not one of the hardest. He heard a squeal of delight from a blonde girl at the back.

"Let's see then Moira."

Moira brought her newly transfigured goblet to his desk. He examined it before smiling.

"Ten points to Gryffindor," said exclaimed James kind of proudly. "Looks like you won't be getting homework today."

Moira grinned before going back to her friends and showing off her work. There was a sharp knock at the door.

"Come in, "shouted James, putting his feet up on his desk. The door opened and the person walked in. It was one of his seventh years, Courtney Summers. She was an ice queen. The most popular girl in school yet it was most likely that most people secretly didn't like her. She wore very revealing clothes and was probably very experienced with guys. Her black skirt barely went past her arse, showing her long shapely legs, her white school shirt was tight and unbuttoned at the top showing cleavage and she left her black robes open. Although in James's point of view, the worst thing about her was the fact that she was very lustful towards him.

She walked, as though on the catwalk, down the aisle to his desk, flipping her blonde hair over her shoulder she did so.

"What is it that you want Miss Summers?" asked James, taking his feet off the desk and sitting up straight in his chair. "Shouldn't you be in class?"

"Professor Evans sent me Sir," she replied flirtatiously. "And, please, call me Courtney."

James grinned showing her his pearly white teeth. "Of course. What does Professor Evans want?"

"She needs you to come to our classroom. Something happened that she can't fix and she needs your extraordinary skills in transfiguration."

"Tell her I'll be there in a minute. I just need to set my class some work to do."

"Ok don't be too long." She walked out of the room, her hips deliberately swaying side to side.

"Right, everyone wands down," ordered James, standing up. "I've got to go help Professor Evans with something but I'll be back soon. I want you to read from chapter 18 and onwards in your Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration books. No one is to use magic and you will behave yourselves. If I come back and someone is disobeying those rules you'll be in detention with me. I won't be too long."

He left the room and walked through the corridors and down a floor to where Lily's classroom was situated. He knocked on the door politely before entering. It seemed normal. The students were reading from textbooks but they all seemed to have amusement etched onto their facial features. Lily was sat at her desk with a scowl on her pretty face.

"What's wrong?" asked James, walking towards her. "Courtney came to find me and said you were in some sort of trouble and you needed me but everything looks fine to me."

"Look under my desk," said Lily, her voice muffled. James looked confused and sent her a questioning stare but knew not to ask when she sent a glare his way. He bent down and looked under the desk. Nothing was out of the ordinary until he saw her legs. They weren't her legs. Her lovely legs that he'd been admiring since he was thirteen had been transfigured into a mermaid's tail. A long, scaly, gold mermaid's tail.

James stood up again and looked ready to burst into laughter.

"Don't you dare laugh James Harold Darwin Potter," scolded Lily, glaring. "It's not funny."

"You've got to admit that it is," smirked James. "Who did it anyway?"

Lily pointed angrily to a boy who sat at the back. He was also in James's transfiguration class.

"Wow that's impressive magic, Nick, we haven't even done that in class yet," grinned James. Lily glared at James again and he realized what he had done. "I mean, that was bad very bad. Never do it again."

The class laughed at him and he grinned too.

"It wasn't that impressive," huffed Lily. "He hasn't got a clue how to reverse the spell."

"Couldn't you have done it yourself," asked James, he cocked his head to one side and his hazel eyes were twinkling with mischief and excitement.

"You know transfiguration is my worst subject and we all know how much you love to play hero," answered Lily cockily.

"It comes naturally to the Potter family."

"You wish," muttered Lily darkly. "Are you going to help me get my legs back or what?"

"Come on we'll have to go to your office though," said James.

"I can't walk you idiot," exclaimed Lily.

"Well I'm going to have to carry you then."

Lily stared at him open mouthed.

"Do you want your precious legs back?"

"Yes, yes of course I do," said Lily. "Give me a minute first. Right I want you all to continue reading from your books. Make notes about the things you think will be helpful. We're having a test on it tomorrow so be thorough. Nick, seeing as you like transfiguration so much you can serve detention tonight by cleaning out all the cages that are used by the animals that get transfigured, with Professor Potter. That and fifty points from Gryffindor."

"I can't, I've got a meeting with Dumbledore," said James, apologetically.

"That's ok, I'll supervise it then," said Lily. "Nick I want you in Professor Potter's classroom at eight o'clock and don't be late."

Nick nodded his head and grumbled something that was undecipherable. James placed one arm around her waist and one arm under her knees. Or at least where her knees would be if she had legs. He waited before her arms were safely latched around his neck before lifting her up easily. The majority of the girls in the classroom had jealously in their eyes. They'd love to be in their charms teacher's position. James took her out of the classroom and walked through the corridors of Hogwarts.

"You know I'm getting déjà vu," chuckled James. "Do like being in my arms or something?"

Lily smacked him round the head but she had a small smile on her face too. "Why couldn't you have reversed the spell in the classroom?"

"I'd have thought that would have been obvious Lilyflower." She looked at him still confused, shaking her head. "Think about it. You've currently got no articles of clothing on your lower half. If I just reversed it you'd have legs but they'd be completely bare and so would everything up to your waist be. I don't know about you but I don't like taking my kit off to a room full of students."

Her cheeks tinged with pink. He smiled at her expression. She looked cute like that. They had finally reached her office and he walked straight through that into her bedroom. He dropped her onto her bed gently and sat down beside her tail and placed it on his lap as he raised his wand.

"No don't!" cried Lily, as he was about to reverse the magic. He looked at her questioningly. "You said I'd be naked waist down. You can't look!"

"Nothing I haven't seen before." said James with a small sincere smile on his lips. She blushed again and bit her lip. James sighed and grabbed her black silk kimono from the floor. She smiled at him and put it on, loosely tying it up around her waist but making sure it covered her. "Now can I get your legs back?" She nodded feverishly.

He did a few intricate wand movements with a look of concentration on his face. A few seconds later and he had a pair of bare, smooth, gorgeous legs in his lap and not a big fish tail. He rubbed them up and down once before placing them on the bed.

Lily smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you so much," she said graciously. "I always knew you'd come in handy one day."

"I'm handy twenty four seven."

"If you say so," laughed Lily. "You can go now; I'll just get dressed then go back to my class."

He nodded and stood up as did she. She hugged him goodbye before he left.

"We need to talk," said James seriously, leaning against the doorframe as he watched her go through her wardrobe. "About what happened Saturday morning. It's already Monday and we haven't had the chance yet."

"We will," said Lily quietly, looking at the skirt in her hands, anywhere but his eyes. "Just not now. We have classes."

"Soon though." Lily nodded. He walked out of the door but shouted one last thing first. "You make a good mermaid." Lily couldn't see him but she could hear the smirk in his voice.

After his meeting with Dumbledore James was leisurely walking back to his classroom to get his essays he had to mark. It was around half nine so most students were in their common rooms except from a few older students as their curfew wasn't until ten. His meeting had been rather uneventful. Basically it was just a report on how his students were doing and what was happening in class and what students had been particularly troublesome.

He entered his classroom to find Lily sat at his desk quietly writing something down. She was too caught up in her work to even notice him in the room.

"Hey," he said softly, once he had walked right up to the desk. She looked up startled but smiled when she realized who it was.

"Hey yourself," she said, still doing her work. "You scared me."

"It's not my fault you didn't hear me come in," grinned James. "Where's Nick?"

"He's in the backroom cleaning the cages like I said. Without magic."

"You can go now if you want," offered James. "I'm here so I can supervise now."

"It's ok," smiled Lily. "I've almost finished marking these essays. There's no point in moving now."

"Alright but shift over cause I've got some of my homework to mark too."

Lily grinned and scooted over as he grabbed a chair and sat on it next to her.

"We could have that talk now," suggested James as he dipped his eagle feather quill into a pot of emerald coloured ink.

"Not until Nick's gone. I'm you sure you can wait another fifteen minutes," answered Lily. "What's with the emerald coloured ink?"

"I've used it for years," mused James, staring straight into her eyes. "It always reminded me of you. Cause of your eyes. I've never been able to find one that's matched them perfectly though. It's always never bright enough or never green enough or never rich enough."

Lily stared at him for a moment before letting herself smile. James could be the sweetest guy when he wanted to be. Neither of them said anything for the next ten minutes but it felt like hours to them. James was just reading over a first year's essay when he felt something nudge his leg gently. He looked over at Lily but she was still marking her own first year's essays and her face wasn't giving anything away. James nudged her foot back. That's how they ended up playing footsie under the desk. Both of them had small smiles on their faces as they sat in contented silence.

Five minutes later Nick came out of the backroom looking incredibly grumpy.

"Professor, am I allowed to go yet? It's nearly curfew."

Lily glanced up at the clock and smiled.

"Yes of course you can," said Lily, in her strict professor voice. "Here's your wand and next time don't be getting into trouble with it."

He nodded and scurried out of the room after receiving his wand.

"You wanted to talk," said Lily, looking round to face James. He nodded. "So talk."

"Right," started James. "We've both agreed that what happened on Saturday was wrong and it was just a heat of the moment thing, right?" Lily nodded. "We're two mature adults that keep any lustful feelings we have of each other to ourselves. It was just the situation that we were in that any of those feelings even occurred. I mean, we've moved on from what happened five years ago. You've haven't gotten any feelings for me and I've got Gwen. This, leads to something else. Nobody can find out, especially Gwen. She's nice when you get to know her and sweet but she can be a bit of a bitch to people she doesn't like and I'm going to guess that she wont like you when she finds out that you kiss her boyfriend a lot better than she can."

Lily laughed quietly to herself but James managed to hear it anyway.

"It's true," defended James. "That was some kiss. Unfortunately, one that can never happen."

"Are things serious between you and her?" asked Lily curiously.

"I suppose," pondered James. "I've been dating her for about a year and half. She moved in about a year ago. I feel pressured to propose though. Her family always drop hints by saying that I'll be a good husband whenever I'm there. She just smiles and winks at me. I know the Daily Prophet have written articles about when I'm going to pop the question. I'm used to publicity like that though. I don't think Sirius and Remus like her much. She doesn't approve of Sirius's silliness or our mischief. I think my parents think she's too snobby. She comes from a rich pureblood family though so I kind of expect that. But, I mean, I'm from one of the richest and oldest pureblood families that there is and I'm not snobby about it. My dad was the minister of magic but you didn't see me gloating about it during Hogwarts."

"It doesn't matter about the media or your families," Lily said earnestly. "It's all about whether you can see yourself having a future with her and whether or not you love her."

"When I see my future I picture a clichéd house with a white picket fence. A big garden, with a swing, and lots of messy black haired kids running around it. I want my wife to be a caring mother. I want a family. I know that Gwen wants none of that. She doesn't want kids; they'll ruin her figure she says. She wants glitz and glam."

"It's not necessarily about what you want. Everybody wants different things. Things happen though and people change their minds about things. The big question is do you love her?"

James hesitated and looked into her eyes first. They seemed to be reassuring him. "She loves me and I-I suppose I love her too."

"Your futures don't matter as long as you love each other," smiled Lily. James saw through it though. Her lips were smiling but her eyes weren't. When Lily smiled her eyes lit up. He could read her like a book and this book was lying. He didn't question it though.

"I've always known you were smart but not this smart," laughed James.

"I'm a girl, girls know these things," said Lily grinning. "Anyways it's nearly half ten, I should go. I'll see you tomorrow." She leaned over and kissed his cheek softly before gathering all of her belongings.

"Bye Lily," said James in his soft velvety voice that women and girls everywhere fell in love with. "And remember, it's our little secret!"


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

In the month that James and Lily had become close again time had flown by. It was already Christmas time! It was the 21st of December and tomorrow James would be off home, for holiday, for the first time in nearly four months. He couldn't wait. Unfortunately for him he had to spend the next hour or two decorating the hall with the other professors. It was funny watching Lily and Professor Slughorn decorate two separate trees. She was doing the spell perfectly. With a simple twirl of her wand the string of real life fairies were twisting up from the bottom of the tree to the top neatly. Where as the tree Slughorn was decorating looked nothing like hers. He could see her laughing merrily as she went to help him. She had once been his favourite student because of her brilliance in potions but charms had always been her real specialty. James's own tree looked decent enough he supposed. He picked up a random bauble and transfigured it with a swish of his wand into a beautiful golden angel with red hair and green eyes. He grinned as he levitated it up to sit at the top of his tree.

"Guess who," Said someone from behind him as his eyes were covered by a pair of small soft hands. He grabbed them with his own hands and pulled them around his body so that the person was hugging him.

"Dumbledore?" said James playing along. He heard a feminine giggle from behind him. He knew it was her all along. He turned around and stepped back a bit so he was still holding her hands loosely by his side.

"Nope, just me," said Lily smiling brightly. "Will you come help me decorate my office? Pretty please." How could he say no to her adorable puppy dog eyes?

"Sure but I don't know why you want to decorate it anyways."

Ten minutes later they had left the great hall and were in her office. She was up a ladder tying some tinsel to the ceiling whilst he was sat lazily on her desk by the foot of the ladder throwing up and down one of the festive coloured baubles.

"You could help you know."

"I could but this is more fun," he replied grinning up at the figure on the ladder. She looked over her shoulder and childishly stuck her tongue out at him. She looked so cute like that. Her face glowing with happiness, her red hair cascaded down her back in curls, her emerald eyes dancing with immature fun. She was wearing tight dark coloured jeans, which at the bottom were tucked into her black boots, a white long sleeved t-shirt with a black body warmer over the top. It was quite cold now. He too was attired similarly. He was wearing jeans with a forest green turtle neck jumper and trainers.

"Well could you at least throw the bauble you're playing around with to me?"

He threw the bauble up at her. Lily not being the best catcher missed it and made the ladder wobble dangerously. She screamed as she slipped off it. James stood and outstretched his strong arms to catch her. He thanked quidditch silently for enabling his fast reactions as he caught her before she hit the ground.

"Are you ok?" he asked concerned.

She nodded. "I'm fine thanks to you," she said smiling in relief.

"It's what I'm here for," grinned James. He looked somewhat puzzled whilst looking down at her bemused face.

"What do I have something on my face?" asked Lily confused.

"No," he said laughing softly. "I just can't figure out what kind of perfume you were. It smells nice."

"It's honeysuckle."

"That's an unusual smell for a perfume."

"We used to have a honeysuckle plant in my garden when I was little," explained Lily. "My dad used to garden a lot and I used to help him. I suppose the garden was what made me and him close. Honeysuckle was my favourite plant and when I got into Hogwarts I was upset because I'd miss gardening with my dad. So he searched everywhere and he managed to find a place where it could be made specially. Honeysuckle perfume. He used to buy me a bottle every year so when I was at Hogwarts I could still smell my favourite flower, and when he died, in my seventh year, I kept on buying it to remind me of him and all the times I spent in that garden with him."

James placed her on her feet and hugged her softly.

"Hey it's ok, it was years ago, I'm fine," smiled Lily, sadly. James smiled softly at her and let her go.

"Well however unusual smell and sad the background story behind it it's a gorgeous smell and it fits you perfectly."

"You're so sweet," said Lily, cupping his face and gently stroking his face with her thumb. James couldn't tear his eyes apart from hers and Lily was slightly terrified of the look in his. His beautiful hazel eyes had turned dark. They looked torn and confused. Like a battle of emotions were fighting to come out. The contact broke as he couldn't bear it anymore and grabbed her hand away from his face and he tuned to sit on the desk again away from her. She was left standing bewildered as she daren't look back up at him.

"Are you staying here for the holiday?" asked James, not being able to stand the silence.

"Yeah," answered Lily, finally finding her voice. "I don't want to spend it alone in my apartment. My sister hates me so I can't go to hers. Alice did invite me to stay with her and Frank but it's their first Christmas as a married couple so I didn't really fancy intruding on that."

"You could stay with me and my family," proclaimed James, grinning again. "My mum wouldn't mind. She loves lots of people in the house at Christmas and there's plenty of room. My mum, dad and I would be there obviously. Gwen's staying, Remus and Sirius are as well but not Peter cause he's says he staying with his family. So what do you say?"

Lily shook her head politely. "Thanks for the offer James but I really can't accept it."

"Why not?" asked James, looking disappointed.

"Because I've spent the last five years until now hating you for what I thought you'd done," illustrated Lily. "And you must have spent some if not all of that time mad at me as well. I can't after only a couple of months of being you're friend again spend Christmas with your family. It's just too weird for me at the moment. That and because Gwen's going to be there. I'd feel guilty around her all the time."

"I understand," said James feeling guilty too. It was the first time he had realized that as well. "Gwen…she wouldn't notice if you were there anyways. I don't mean that in an offence way. It's just that she ignores Sirius and Remus so I expect she'd pretty much do the same to any of my friends she meets."

"James I'm not coming," said Lily smiling softly.

"Fine," said James, pouting. "But I don't like the thought of you spending Christmas all alone."

"I won't be here all alone," laughed Lily. "Christmas's at Hogwarts are magical, pun not intended."

James laughed too. "Come on, we've got to get this place decorated without falling of ladders."

James dumped his travel bag in the foyer as he walked through his childhood home. He went into the lounge and settled himself on the black leather couch. The room was fairly large like the rest of the Potter Mansion. A large family portrait was hanging over the marble fireplace. It was painted ten years ago when James was only thirteen years old. It was tradition to have a Potter family portrait painted every ten years so the next one was going to be done soon. He looked upon the face of his thirteen year old self. He looked so young and innocent. He had a happy lopsided grin on his face and he was shorter and kind of skinny looking. James remembered that was around the time he had started chasing after Lily saying he was madly in love her. It was easier when he was thirteen. He only had eyes for Lily and he was free to lust after her without worrying that it was against the rules or feeling guilty because he was already in a relationship. He sighed as he thought of her all by herself at Hogwarts.

"I hope you're not disappointed about being home James?"

James turned with a big smile on his face as he heard his mother's voice. He got up and gave his mum a big warm hug. Mrs Potter was short and slightly plump. She was elderly looking with wrinkles around her eyes but she had a kind face. She had James's hazel eyes but she had red hair that was streaked with grey in her old age. James looked down at his mother's face and smiled.

"Of course I'm not disappointed to be home," smiled James. "I love it that I'm home with my family. Where is everybody else?"

"Your father and the boys are in the kitchen," answered his mum. By the boys she meant Remus and Sirius. She had come to care for them like the sons she didn't have. James was an only age and had come late in the Potter's life. They had believed they couldn't have children but then a miracle came in the form of James. Hence, he had been pampered and spoilt rotten when he was a child. "Gwen is out somewhere."

"Ok let's go to the kitchen then." He grabbed his mother's hand and led her through to the kitchen where the rest of his family was.

Sirius and his father were sat at the table together discussing the latest quidditch match and Remus was sat opposite them reading a bulky book.

"James!" Sirius exclaimed before he pounced on him.

"Good to see you too Padfoot," grinned James. "Same to you Moony."

"Missed you James," said Remus, closing the book and placing it on the table. "Sirius has been miserable without you."

Sirius pouted as James laughed.

"I've missed you son," said his father holding his out his hand. James grabbed it and pulled his father into a hug. James and his father looked incredibly alike. Apart from the eyes. His father had blue eyes were as James had beautiful hazel eyes. They both had the same messy black hair but his father's was streaked with grey. They had the same strong build and were tall. James had actually grown taller than his father by about an inch.

"Likewise dad," grinned James.

"Oh by the way James I forgot to tell you earlier," said his mother suddenly. "Tonight we're going to the annual Ministry of Magic's Christmas Ball."

"What?"


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

No matter how beautiful the inside of the Ministry of Magic's grandest ballroom had been decorated for the occasion James was still not in the mood for a ball. Outside the ballroom he was hounded by Daily Prophet reporters and other such magazines. Asking him, whether or not, he was proposing any time soon. Asking if he was returning to the England quidditch team again as they had been playing rather poorly without him. He was their top chaser after all. He'd grown up in the spotlight thought so he was pretty much used to the attention. At home his father had been minister of magic and growing up he had had to attend formal events like this. At school he was Hogwarts's golden boy and then he had become a world famous quidditch player. He still wasn't sure if he wanted to go back to his quidditch career after his teaching year had ended.

James hated wearing dress robes. The ones he was wearing today were black and very stylish as they were the latest designer robe in wizarding wear. He preferred Jeans to robes any day. Gwen, who was currently socializing among the rich, was wearing a long powder blue gown that skimmed the floor and had a large slit up the side and low cut. Her platinum blonde hair was piled on top of her head in some fancy French knot. His mum and dad were talking to one of his dad's former colleagues and were both looking very decent themselves. James wasn't socializing or talking to anybody. Instead he was sat at one of the little glass tables drinking a muggle drink called a blueberry martini. He needed stronger stuff if he was going to last the night.

The hall was filled up as most people had arrived but a few more people were still arriving every so often. James looked up as the door opened to reveal a young red head that looked stunning. Lily. She was wearing the most gorgeous dress ever. An emerald green dress that hugged her curves and touched the floor. It had no sleeves and came in tight at the waist then flowed out towards the floor. She was scanning the room and looked surprised but happy to see him as she made her ay towards him. On a closer look she was even more beautiful. The front of her hair was pinned back and the rest flowed down her back in elegant curls. She had used make up sparsely but it looked enchanting. The thing that made him smile the most was the silver heart shaped locket that hung around her neck. He had given it to her as an eighteenth birthday present before they had even started dating. The locket contained no pictures of James or Lily only a picture of a beautiful hazel eyed stag. The picture had confused Lily greatly until she had discovered the secret of the marauders. He didn't know she wore it.

"I thought you were staying at Hogwarts over the holidays," said James but he was in no way complaining.

"I was going to but Dumbledore said I should go here and celebrate Christmas properly," laughed Lily. "I don't know if he meant that I should come here and get drunk and celebrate that way."

"He could have meant celebrating in a different way," suggested James moving his eyebrows up and down.

Lily smacked him round the head but giggled anyways. "You were always too rude."

"I'm a man what do you expect."

"Not a lot."

"You want to dance?" asked James, gesturing to the dance floor.

Lily smiled. "Of course." He put his hand in the small of her back as he led her to the dance floor. He smiled at the way his hand seemed to fit perfectly. Once in a good place he left his hand there and held her soft hand in his calloused, from years of quidditch, one. She placed her other hand on his shoulders as the two of them twirled gracefully around the dance floor.

"I didn't know you could dance so well James," smirked Lily.

"My dad was the minister of magic, I was brought up going to these social formal events," grinned James. "I had to learn how to dance superbly and be a gentleman at a very young age. My mum hated taking me to things like this when I was younger but I had to go. When I was a teenage it was ok because she'd just leave me to chat up the girls."

Lily laughed. "Let me guess, you used your Potter charm that has been used many a time to seduce young women everywhere."

"You always were the clever one," smirked James. Lily sighed in exasperation and laid her head on his built chest as they swayed to the music.

Half an hour later and Lily and James had been dancing with each other continuously. That was at least until Sirius and Remus interrupted them.

"Hey you don't mind if we take James away from you for a bit?" asked Sirius after he tapped her on the shoulder. "It's just that we're feeling left out and James needs to be shared."

"There's enough James for everyone," proclaimed James whilst Lily laughed at their antics. "You don't mind though, do you? I'm sure I won't be long. Get a drink or powder your nose or whatever you girls do."

"You just go with your friends," said Lily. "I think I'll take your idea and go get myself a drink."

James was led by his fellow marauders to the balcony where they had privacy.

"Anything important that you dragged me away to talk about?" asked James, running a hand through his hair.

"Not really we just fancied a chat with you," grinned Sirius. "Are we allowed to do that?"

"Of course you are Padfoot. You're both like my brothers."

"We were worried Lily had taken over our place."

"Of course she hasn't," laughed James. "Seeing as we're all here, chatting, I want to know about you guys. You two got any girlfriends? What about those girls I saw you leave the Halloween party with?"

Remus blushed and James grinned. "Spill Remus."

"I've been seeing that girl, Hannah, since Halloween. I really like her but she doesn't know I'm a werewolf yet so she'll probably run away from me when she finds out."

"She won't Remus," said James seriously. "You turn into a monster unwillingly once a month. You're Remus the rest of the time. Any girl would be crazy top dump you."

Instead of Remus being able to thank his friend he was cut off by numerous screams and crashes coming from the ballroom. The three marauders rushed in to a horrific scene.

More than a dozen or so figures in dark robes and masks were around the room, wands out scaring everyone in the vicinity. A tall man with pale snakelike features was stood in the middle of the room. He looked as though he was had been handsome in a past lifetime and his face had melted to form the waxy white face now. James knew who this was. Voldemort and his death eaters. The mass murdering psychopath.

"Where is little Potter Junior?" teased Voldemort evilly. "It's him I've come to see."

Several people who knew James gasped. James gulped and looked back at Sirius and Remus before stepping out of the silenced crowd to where Voldemort could see him clearly.

"What is it that you want Voldemort?" asked James, his voice surprisingly calm and even for someone who had been picked out by the most malevolence man that had existed. James whipped out his wand and pointed it had Voldemort as he talked.

"I don't think you'll need that Potter," sneered Voldemort, who also had his wand at the ready. "Unless you want your beloved dead." Before James had the chance to comprehend what he had just said. Voldemort had summoned someone from the crowd and was now clutching her with his wand digging into her neck menacingly.

"You know, for a very clever evil mass murderer your not even that clever," said James somewhat laughing. "You got the wrong person. She's not my girlfriend."

Lily was looking at him like he was insane. He was laughing at the guy who was currently poking his wand into her. A guy who could kill her at any moment. She looked drip white and terrified at the thought.

"It is you who is not the wise one," sneered Voldemort. "I know she's not your girlfriend but she is the girl you're madly in love with."

James's face hardened and his voice had gone dangerously low and angry. "Let her go. She hasn't done anything to you. It's me you want. Just let her go."

"So you do love her then," He laughed mercilessly. "And I'm afraid I can't. She's here to stop you doing something stupid. She's such a pretty thing as well. You're a very lucky man Mr Potter."

He had grabbed Lily's face roughly and brought it up to his. She was breathing shallowly and quickly. Her face had been drained from any colour and her mascara had ran down her face with her tears. Her emerald eyes widened and she silently pleaded him to stop. His snakelike eyes danced with malevolence as he lowered his mouth to her ear and started whispering.

"You know I might not kill you after all. You'd do some good as my personal whore despite being a mudblood bitch. Your body makes up for it." Lily looked disgusted at him and even more petrified. James felt helpless as he saw Lily get practically get man handled by the man he hated the most and all because of him.

"Let go of her now!" shouted James, no longer being able to see her pain. "Or I swear to Merlin I will do something I won't regret!"

"James don't you dare do something stupid cause I'll come back from the dead just to kill you!" screamed Lily crying her eyes out. Voldemort ragged her head back by her hair painfully. She winced and gulped.

"You should learn to shut up Mudblood."

"Let her go," said a wise firm voice from the grand doors of the ballroom. Dumbledore stood there with his wand out and ready. Voldemort scowled. He muttered some kind of spell and Lily went flying into the wall. James could already see blood trickling down her pale face as she slid to the floor.

Before James could run to her, Voldemort and his men had left, after sending spells up at the ceiling bits of it crash down. The room was in chaos. People screaming and trying to get out before giant pieces of stone flattened them to death. James didn't care about his own safety only Lily's. Unfortunately with all the commotion and people running out and the healers running in he lost sight of her and couldn't get her.

"Where is she?" He asked frustrated to no one in particular. He was searching around the room panic mode. With all the stone falling and from whatever the hell spell that bastard hit her with she could be dead thought James dejectedly. He saw what he was looking for at long last. He could see locks of dust covered red hair coming out from under a pile or rubble. He rushed towards it and started to throw the rocks of it frantically. Finally he could make out her practically lifeless body covered in her now dirty green dress.

"Lily? Lily? Wake up, please, wake up," James said over and over frantically. His face now pale with worry. He was shaking her frenetically, trying to get any sign of life from her. Her body just rolled about with each shake and not responding to anything he was doing. Her necklace was strewn on the floor a few feet away. He picked it up and held it close to his heart as a tear escaped his eye.

His mother was by the door helping the healers get patients out in an orderly fashion. She was a healer before she retired and was one of the best St.Mungos ever had. She knew what she was doing and never lost her calm in a crisis.

"Mum!" shouted James. "Mum! Mum! Please come here quickly! It's Lily I think she might be…she might be dead."


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

James sat on the black velvet covered chair as he stared out of the window mournfully. He could see stars twinkling upon the black sky. To him he thought they were laughing at him. He glared at them and tears fell from his eyes. He wiped them away angrily.

"James it's ok to be upset," soothed his mother. "But she's going to live."

"Look at her though!" shouted James. "She hasn't made any signs of movement since last night and I'm so scared that she'll never wake up. When I found her under all that rubble, I thought, I thought she was dead. I seriously thought that I would never see her smile again, or hear or laugh, or even make her shout for hours at me. All I want is for her to do something to reassure me that she's going to be fine. A flutter of her eyelids, the slight touch of a hand, anything!"

"James she was seriously injured," said his mother gravely. "And with whatever spell Voldemort cast it's hard to heal her wounds. She isn't just going to get better overnight."

"Will she ever wake up?" asked James fearfully.

"I sure hope so love," said his mother smiling softly. "If not for her sake then at least yours. I'm going to go downstairs for a bit. Come and get me if there's the slightest change in her condition. Gwen and the boys are worried about you. You haven't slept at all. We're worried about your safety too; Voldemort must have singled you out for a reason."

"I have no idea why he did that," said James honestly. "It's my entire fault Lily is how she is. He did this to her because of me. If I wasn't there she'd be enjoying the holidays."

"Don't blame yourself James," said his mother kindly. "It wasn't your fault. It was Voldemort's fault. He was the one who did this."

James just nodded silently as his mother left the room. He looked over at the bed in which Lily lay. They didn't take her to the hospital because James didn't want her to be in there over Christmas. He had pleaded his mother to take care of her at their home. He grabbed her cold pale hand and held it close to his chest. She looked like she was sleeping peacefully with a small smile on her face. Her body previously had been covered in bruises and cuts but his mother had done excellent work and they had been vanished. Several of her ribs had been broken and her chest was currently wrapped up in bandages. Her head had been severely bashed up and she had lost a lot of blood by the time his mother had gotten to her. But she had survived but all he wanted her to do now was to wake up.

He leant over her and gazed and her soft lips. He reached down slowly and pressed his lips gently to her. He leant back and looked at her face as he traced her lips with his finger tips softly. Her eyelids fluttered open slowly and he'd never been so happy to see her emerald eyes ever before. He smiled at her in disbelief pulling her close to him as he muttered into her hair as he hugged her fiercely.

"I thought I had lost you," muttered James. "I thought you'd never wake up."

"Don't hug so hard it hurts," gasped Lily. "I was so scared. I thought he was going to kill me right there right then."

"I would never have let him hurt you," said James, relaxing his grip on her.

"Where am I?" asked Lily, sitting up with a wince from the pain. "This isn't St.Mungos."

"You're in one of the guest rooms at the Potter Mansion. I didn't want you in the hospital over Christmas so I brought you here with me. My mum's a healer," explained James. "Take it easy. I'll be just a minute I need to get my mum and tell her you're awake."

He ran down the corridor to the top of the staircase. "Mum!" He shouted happily. "Mum! Get here quickly, she's awake!" He heard an outbreak of movement downstairs and then ran back to Lily.

Her face had regained colour but she looked in a lot of discomfort and pain.

"Are you ok?" asked James seriously, cupping her face gently with his hands, looking into her eyes for the answer. She gazed back into hazel orbs fiercely. God, she looked kissable. What the hell? She could have died last night and you're thinking about kissing, thought James scolding himself. Someone from behind him cleared their throat loudly.

Standing in the room was his mother, his father, Gwen, Sirius and Remus. His mother and father looked relieved but suspicious. Gwen looked annoyed. Sirius and Remus looked ecstatic. James took his hands away from her and dropped them into his lap.

"Hello dear, I'm James's mother, Louise Potter, I've been looking after you," smiled Louise. "I used to be a healer but I retired a year a year ago."

"I remember you," said Lily smiling slightly. "I was a healer before I started teaching. I wasn't one your interns but I used to see you sometimes on the wards."

"Evans is your last name isn't it?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Please call me Lou," said Lou fondly. "You got the highest scoring marks on every healing exam and practical. I was shocked when I heard you'd gone into teaching. You would have been very important to St.Mungos." Lily blushed at the compliment. "Well, dear, you were hurt quite severely. You had nasty bruises and cuts, broken bones and you hit your head quite hard. Is there anywhere in particular that is painful?"

"I'm aching all over but my head and chest are killing me."

"I'll go get some potions for them then. I couldn't give you any when in your coma."

"Coma!?!"

"Yes dear, but not for long. It's Christmas Eve now. Well in a few hours it will be Christmas."

"I've got to get back to Hogwarts," said Lily trying to stand up, but failing as James had simply put one arm across her stomach stopping her from getting up. "James move your arm."

"No I won't," smirked James. "Dumbledore has practically ordered us to keep you here. He says you should enjoy the festivities with friends."

Lily sighed and sat back down. Lou handed her three different potions. Being a healer she didn't need to be told which order to drink them in. She drank the sludgy brown first with her face etched with disgust. Then the weird turquoise coloured one that gave the same nasty taste you get when you accidentally get perfume in your mouth. The third on tasted quite pleasantly of peppermint. Lily shuddered as she could feel the potions effects running through her body. Within a few minutes she felt fine.

"Lily do you mind if I have a word with you in my office?" asked James's father.

"Of course not Mr Potter," said Lily politely.

"Please call me Harry," smiled Harry. "James you might as well come as well."

James nodded to his father and stood up holding his hand out for Lily to take. When she did it was only then she realized how tired he was looking. His usual trademark messy black hair was even more disheveled than usual and he had tired dark rings under his eyes. He led her down the hallway following his father.

"Dumbledore sent a few house elves with some of your clothes for you while you're here over Christmas," said James, gesturing to what she was wearing.

It was only then she noticed that instead of the beautiful green dress she last remembered wearing she was dressed in her black turtle neck jumper and grey trousers. Her hair was down loose and it smelled like it had been washed.

"Mum did all of that not me," said James, knowing that she had been thinking about who had done all of that. She smiled up at him before sitting on the same brown leather sofa that he did. Harry was sat opposite them on his study chair.

"Lily, I know you went through a lot last night and it was something you probably don't want to ever talk about ever again," said Harry seriously. "But I need to know if you have any idea why Voldemort used you to get to James."

Lily thought for a moment before answering honestly. "I don't know. It's not as though I'm his girlfriend or anything." James looked anywhere but the two of them. "It might be because we have a history together."

"What sort of history?"

"Dad!" said James in a strained voice. "Is that really necessary?"

"Yes it is James," said his father sternly. "She could have been killed because of your _history_"

"Don't you think I know that?" snapped James angrily. "Don't you think I'm tearing myself up about what happened to her?"

"It wasn't your fault James," said Lily, grabbing his shoulders and making him look at her. "You didn't ask Voldemort to send me flying across the room. You weren't the one poking a wand into my neck." His face softened again before he pulled back her hair to see her neck. A purple bruise was there where he digged his wand into her. There was even a small cut there.

"That bastard's going to pay for what he did to you Lily," said James stonily.

"But for now can you go back to being the fun loving carefree James that we all know and love," asked Lily smiling. "I like you much better that way." He stared at her before nodding slightly and turning back to his father who was looking at the pair in interest.

"Dad you already know my _history_ with Lily. You read all those letters I sent home when I was at Hogwarts about her," said James not even the slightest bit embarrassed. Lily on the other hand went bright red. She hadn't been the nicest to him when they were at school, sometimes even cruel. Not in seventh year though. She had made friends with him then so hopefully that redeemed her in some ways.

"Your mother and I know all about your sad attempts at catching her eye," laughed Harry. "But was it all one sided?"

James and Lily glanced at one another sheepishly before Lily answered.

"We became close in seventh year and we did go out for a month but we split up then," said Lily truthfully. "We hadn't seen each other in five years until he started teaching at Hogwarts this year."

"It doesn't make sense then that Voldemort used you to get to James then," mused Harry.

"It does," exclaimed James. "It's because his death eaters are incredibly stupid. Half of them are the Slytherins we went to school with so I know that they are."

There was a knock at the door.

"Come in," said Harry, leaning back in his chair.

Lou entered wearing a fluffy blue dressing gown and her red/grey hair braided.

"Are you finished?" she asked with a yawn. "It's extremely late and they, especially Lily, need their rest. It's Christmas tomorrow after all."

"Of course," said Harry, only noticing the time. "Sweet dreams to the both of you." Lily and James left the room after both bidding good night to the Potters.

"Have you noticed how James is different around her?" asked Lou, as she sat on the sofa that had been occupied them just a minute ago. "He's more thoughtful, more caring, and more loving."

"Yeah," nodded Harry. "She managed to calm him down from his anger within just a few seconds. You remember when he was younger how long it took to calm him down when he was in a temper."

"It took forever. It's obvious he loves her, even if he doesn't realize it himself yet."

"He's got Gwen though Lou. I know James. He won't just dump her for Lily like that. He won't think its right. He'll stay with Gwen even if it makes him unhappy."

"He's always been a noble stubborn boy hasn't he?"

"Yes he has but now he's a noble stubborn man who's capable of making the right decisions himself," said Harry thoughtfully.

"They remind me of us when we were their age."

"Yeah, I don't know what it is but Potter men always seem to fall for redheads," grinned Harry.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

James groaned as sunlight streamed though the gap in the curtains. He rolled over, expecting Gwen to be lying next to him, but she wasn't and he fell off the bed in a heap. He cursed angrily to himself and got up to find Gwen putting some of her clothes in her suitcase.

"Why are you packing? It's Christmas!"

"Daddy wants me home for Christmas," explained Gwen in her sugar coated voice. "You know what he's like when he's angry."

"But you promised you'd spend it with my family this year," said James, losing his temper slightly. "You can't just change your mind last minute. And Christmas morning is a little last minute."

"I can and I am doing," snapped Gwen, tucking her blonde hair behind her ear angrily. "It's not as though your family even like me."

"Of course they like you don't be stupid."

"You're calling me stupid now!"

"You know I didn't mean it like that!" said James exasperatedly. "Please, can we not fight, especially as you have to leave. Think about it Gwen, if you go, I wont see you again until Easter. That's months away!"

"I'm not leaving for the whole holiday," explained Gwen, putting her arms around his waist. "Just for today. I'll be back tomorrow night."

James sighed. "Ok then," he said reluctantly before bending down and kissing her lips softly. She smiled him as they parted with her baby blue eyes twinkling. Blue? He had been expecting to see bright emerald eyes.

"What's wrong?" asked Gwen, noticing his confused face.

"Nothing," smiled James. "I was just thinking about how much I'm going to miss you today." Being a Marauder it was easy to lie and lie good.

She grinned. "I'll miss you too sweetie. We should exchange presents now then."

"Yeah," agreed James. "Wait a sec, yours is in the wardrobe." He rummaged around the bottom for a minute before finding the little pink box. He handed it to her and gave her a quick kiss. "Merry Christmas."

Inside the box was a beautiful silver butterfly broach that was encrusted with pink diamonds. She was eyeing its beauty and James knew that she was estimating the price in her head.

"It's gorgeous, thank you so much, Merry Christmas to you as well." She handed him his present. It was neatly wrapped in dark blue wrapping paper that had little snitches zooming across it. He unwrapped it, and grinned when he saw it. It was a bottle of one of the finest mulled meads around. He knew his alcohol and he knew this one tasted delicious.

"You should be thankful for that," huffed Gwen. "It's a rare bottle and I had to pay a large sum of galleons for it. It took my assistant ages to track the dealer down."

"Thank you," smiled James. "When do have to go?"

She glanced at her diamond coated watch and bit her lip guiltily. "Now actually."

James frowned and kissed her one last time. "I suppose I'll see you tomorrow night then."

"Tomorrow night it is." With a pop she was gone. He sighed and looked down at the bottle in his hand. They had only exchanged material gifts. Nothing about them were personal whatsoever. He sat on his bed for a moment before he decided Sirius had slept in long enough.

James crept sneakily into Sirius's room. Sirius was snoring loudly unaware of his presence. He climbed on top of his bed and started jumping up and down shouting "Merry Christmas!" at the top of his voice. Sirius screamed and sat up like a shot. He glared angrily as James started laughing uncontrollably.

"That was NOT funny James!" screeched Sirius.

"You screamed like a girl," said James in between laughs.

"I'll make you scream like a girl if you don't shut up," spat Sirius with venom. James shut up. Sirius was not a morning a person. "Why on earth did you wake me up?"

"Did you not hear my shouts of glee? It's Christmas!"

"Christmas!" shouted Sirius. He got out of bed with a new found hyperactiveness. He rushed to the door only to stop to look back at James in confusion. "What are you waiting for?"

James grinned and followed him out of the room in a dash. They went to Remus's room and repeated the process of jumping up and down on the bed shouting "Merry Christmas" and singing Christmas carols in Sirius's case. Remus was more of a morning person than Sirius but still didn't appreciate the gesture. He also had grown up a bit and wasn't as excited about Christmas as Sirius was. After Remus insisted in getting ready properly, the three of them went to the Potter's bedroom. Fortunately for Lou and Harry they had become accustomed to waking up early to avoid mainly James's flamboyant waking ups on Christmas morning.

"Merry Christmas boys," smirked Harry, who was already fully dressed just like his wife who was currently plumping the white pillows on the queen-size bed.

"Merry Christmas," chorused the three Marauders.

"Now, James, be careful when you wake Lily," warned Lou. "I don't want no shouting, no jumping on her bed and no singing at the top of your voices to wake her up."

"Mum do you honestly think I would do that?"

Lou looked at her son fondly. "I know you wouldn't James. Your father and I will go downstairs and sort the presents out and make breakfast for all of us. Make sure Lily has those three potions I gave her last night. Is Gwen sleeping in?"

"She had to go home," said James before leading the Marauders to her bedroom.

"You know what James, Sirius and I will just go downstairs now," said Remus, elbowing Sirius in the stomach. "Won't we Sirius?"

"Yeah we'll go downstairs," agreed Sirius, rubbing his stomach, glaring at Remus. "See you later." The two waved before going down the staircase whispering to each other. James knocked lightly on Lily's door. After receiving no answer he entered cautiously. She was sat on the window seat, peering through the glass, hugging her knees to her chest. She was wearing a pair of green and white striped pajama pants and a dark green camisole top that had thin straps and lace at the top. Her fiery tresses had been done into two French braids either side of her head. Her face was clear of make up but she didn't need it. She was a natural beauty.

He cleared his throat and she whipped her head round to see who it was. Her face was blank of motions but she seemed to have a lot on her mind. He sat next to her not saying anything as the two of them sat in silence.

"It's snowing outside," said Lily softly. "It looks beautiful."

"Yeah it is," said James, not looking at the scenery outside but staring straight at Lily. She looked up at him as she felt his gaze on her and blushed.

"You shouldn't say things like that."

"I know," he replied gently. "You need to take your potions."

"I already have."

"There's something troubling you," said James seriously. "Tell me."

"Last night, everyone was asking me why he used me to get to you but no one was wondering why he wanted to get to you in the first place," exclaimed Lily. "It's been on my mind all night."

James sighed and waited a moment before answering. "Did you hear about that curse I got hit with at the quidditch world cup?"

"Of course, I was at that match; everyone thought you'd died at first. You fell from such a height," answered Lily, her emerald orbs filled with sadness.

"Well, the Swedish beater that hit me with the curse was a death eater," explained James. "Voldemort had ordered him to kill me but the guy was too afraid to use the killing curse so he thought if he could use a different one and knock me off my broom killing me in the process. When he failed, Voldemort killed him personally apparently. Voldemort knows the power I have, not only magically but my status as well, and he wanted me to go to his side. I, of course, refused. He doesn't like people saying no to him. He isn't desperate to kill me so please don't worry. After the quidditch incident he just wants to scare me. That's why I keep blaming myself for what happened to you though."

"Please don't, it's not your fault that you know the difference between good and evil," said Lily, taking his hand in hers. "Where's everyone else then?"

"Sirius, Remus and my parents are downstairs and Gwen has gone to her families for Christmas instead," answered James as he heaved a sigh. "Are you coming downstairs then? We need to open presents."

She shook her head. "I'll just stay up here. You go down though."

"Why?" asked James, pouting.

She smiled softly at his disappointed face. "Christmas is for family time. You're all a family, including Sirius and Remus, I feel like an outsider."

To her astonishment James started laughing. "Lily you could never be an outsider in the Potter family. In seventh year Sirius and Remus considered you a sister to them and me… well you knew my thoughts on you. My parents accept anyone into this family. They practically raised Sirius themselves. They'll love you."

"Give me a minute then, I need to get dressed."

"No need for that."

I can't go downstairs in my pajamas," laughed Lily.

"Of course you can," said James smirking. "I'm going downstairs like this and I'm only wearing a t-shirt and my boxers. I know for a fact that Sirius is dressed very similarly." She had only just realized his apparel then and she took in his appearance. She blushed at the sight of his grey Merlin Klein boxers but she raised her eyebrows at his navy blue t-shirt and it's grey coloured slogan.

"What?" He asked, bemused at her amusement.

"What kind of a t-shirt is that," said Lily in a fit of giggles. "It says 'Ride the chaser not the broom'. A bit full of yourself aren't you?"

He grinned sheepishly. "It was the first clean t-shirt I found, I swear."

"I believe you I suppose."

"You ready to go downstairs yet?"

"Yeah," smiled Lily, as she got up, and walked downstairs with him as they still held hands.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

Lily and James went into the living room where the Christmas tree and family were. Sirius and Remus were sat on the floor by the tree and Sirius was ogling at the presents. His parents were sat on the couch with a cup of coffee in hand. His mother stared appalling at James and he raised his eyebrows at her in confusion.

"James, you could have put something decent on?" cried out his mother in disgust. "You're still in your underwear."

"Sirius is as well," whined James, sticking out his tongue immaturely.

"I think you'll find that I'm wearing a pair of jeans," pointed out Sirius smugly.

"Oh come on," said James, fighting a losing battle. "You've either seen me naked or got one yourself anyways. I'm not even naked!"

"But Lily's here," said Lou strictly. "She's our guest. She doesn't want to see you walking around half naked."

Sirius scoffed in the background and James glared at him. "Lily's seen me in much less much more recently than all of you."

Lily's eyes widened at the implications he had just made. James's mouth formed an 'o' shape when he realized how wrong that sounded.

"When I say much less, I mean… well, actually I do mean naked," rambled James. "And when I say most recent, I mean like five years ago. Not that we ever did anything when we were both naked. Well we did if we're speaking truthfully. I think I'll just shut up now because I'm digging myself an even bigger hole here."

Harry, Sirius and Remus all smirked at his nervous and jittery behavior where as Lily and his mother seemed to be angry at him. Lily had her hands on her hips glaring at him. Even though she was a lot smaller than him and had a petite body she could still make a grown man cower. Although he did think she looked incredibly sexy with her emerald eyes blazing with anger.

"Thank you for just completely embarrassing me in font of your whole family," snapped Lily, fuming. "I don't want your parents knowing anything about what their only son got up to with me. Say anything else that involves me and you naked again I swear to Merlin you'll never want a woman seeing you naked ever again because you'll be too ashamed."

James winced and subconsciously put his hands in front of his boxers to guard what was underneath them. Next he had to face the wrath of his mother while still being under the glare of Lily.

"James, your father and I raised you to become a gentlemen," barked Lou. "We thought we'd taught you how to respect and treat women correctly. Never ever reveal what you've done with a woman. Very ungentlemanly indeed."

"I can deal with one of you shouting at me but not both," yelped James, running a hand through his hair. "I was nervous so screw me. Probably not the right choice of words to use in this situation but you know what I mean. Its Christmas please don't be mad at me. I've already had an argument with Gwen; I don't need you too having a go at me as well."

"Fine," agreed Lou, her tone much softer now. "We can open presents now. If we don't Sirius looks like he'll die of anticipation."

Sirius grinned and declared himself the present giver outer. He sorted them in to piles and pushed the piles towards the right person, as they were all sat on the floor now. Sirius and James looked at each other before grabbing their first present and quickly ripping the paper off of it. Soon all that was left in James's pile was a little emerald green box, from which he presumed was from Lily. So far he had received; some socks, new shirts, and a box of a hundred sugar quills from his parents. A posh writing set from Remus, complete with five different coloured inks, a whole lot of parchment and a beautiful eagle feather quill. Sirius had given him a new broomstick servicing kit, which James was thankful for because he'd ran out of broomstick wax. Dumbledore had sent him a big bag of sherbet lemons. From Alice and Frank he'd gotten some homemade chocolate brownies. Now he had only Lily's present to open. He took off the ribbon and the lid slowly, eagerness building up inside him. Inside the box was a small crystal stag. James thought it was beautiful.

"I didn't know what to get you," said Lily shyly from beside him. "I just saw that in a shop and it reminded me of you so I thought I'd get it for you. I hope you like it."

"I love it Flower," smiled James sincerely. "Have you opened the present I got you yet?"

Lily shook her head. "I was too busy waiting to see your reaction to what I got you."

He gestured for her to open the black box in front of her. She took the lid off too slowly for James's liking and gasped when she saw what it was. James grinned he could tell she loved it. It was small jewelry box that was made out of wood and had a carving of a lily on the front. It was gorgeous. She opened it to find out that not only was it a jewelry box it was a musical jewelry box. A redheaded ballerina twirled around as the soft tinkle of music played. She listened carefully before smiling.

"It's our song," she said softly, her voice full of emotion. The song 'Tale as old Time' from Beauty and the Beast. That's the song they had danced to at their seventh year Christmas ball. They were by no means together romantically at that point but that was the point Lily had admitted afterwards that she had felt a spark for him.

"Take out the bottom of it," he told her smiling. She glanced curiously at him before doing so. The bottom came out easily to reveal a secret compartment. Her whole face shone with happiness when she obtained what was inside. It was the locket he had given her for her eighteenth, the one that James found on the floor the night of the ball.

"I thought I'd lost this that night," said Lily absentmindedly, as she played with the necklace in between her fingers. "I was scared to tell you in case you were mad at me because of it."

"I wouldn't have been mad," said James reassuringly. "I'm just glad that I found it though."

"Put it on for me?" asked Lily. He smiled and gingerly placed the necklace around her neck. It was back where it belonged. "Thank you for the music box as well. It's beautiful."

"No problem," grinned James, happy he had picked the right present. He'd spent more time choosing and fretting over her present than he did about Gwen's. He knew he shouldn't have, but he wanted it to be perfect. Lily wasn't a material girl. She was the kind of girl that wanted her present to have meaning behind it. She wouldn't have cared if someone spent less than a galleon on her as long as there was a personal touch with it.

Christmas at the Potter's was always a fun experience for anyone. They were a loving family that made anyone feel welcome. Lou was a mother figure. Anyone could see that. Harry was a lot like his son but older and wiser. They treated Sirius and Remus like second sons and James was often caught saying that they loved them more than him. Perhaps it was because they had always wanted a house full of children. James could tell Lily was having fun. Her face was lit up with joy and her green eyes were twinkling again. His mother had outdone herself this year on the Christmas dinner. It was splendid. He would even say it was better than house elves Christmas feast at Hogwarts. After dinner they all retired to the living room with glasses of champagne in hand.

"I for one think it has been a good Christmas this year," declared Lily, raising her glass. James, who was the closest, clinked his glass against hers.

"Apart from the whole you-could-have-got-killed-thing," smirked Sirius.

"Oh yes apart from that," laughed Lily, taking a drink from her glass.

"Don't drink too much champagne flower," warned James, grinning.

"And why ever not?" asked Lily jokingly, sitting up to face him, everyone looking at them in amusement. They could feel the chemistry.

"Because I've seen you drunk and I doubt you want to be seen like that in front of my family," smirked James. "Unless you want them to hear of your undying love for me…"

Lily blushed and slapped his arm playfully. "I have never ever said that to you when I was drunk. Of which I had good reason to be."

"Ok so you never actually said you were madly in love with me," reasoned James. "But by your actions anyone would have said that you were highly attracted to me."

"I was drunk," laughed Lily. "I would have been attracted to Sirius if he was there."

Sirius grinned and nodded his head appreciatively, until he realized that it wasn't actually a compliment. "Hey that's not fair."

Everyone laughed at Sirius's stupidness as he scowled at them all.

"Don't worry Siri you're very good looking," said Lou fondly, chuckling at his annoyance. Sirius grinned and flicked his hair behind his ear. Everyone burst out laughing at him.

The group stayed up late, chatting and laughing. They didn't even consider going to bed until James felt something drop onto his shoulder. He looked down to see Lily sleeping peacefully on him.

"Looks like someone tired out," commented Harry.

"I should take her up to her room," said James. He lifted her head off of him carefully and positioned her in his arms. Once again he was carrying her bridal style. He quietly bid goodnight to everyone and he could hear his mother sigh and he knew exactly what she was thinking.

James stepped into to the guest bedroom that had been made Lily's and put her on the bed softly. She had gotten dressed properly earlier so he cautiously took off her shoes and socks. He didn't know whether to take her top and pants off. He knew that she hated sleeping in the clothes she wore earlier that day but he guessed she wouldn't particularly like the fact he undressed her. He decided to leave her how she was and pulled the covers over her sleeping body. He placed a soft sweet kiss on her lips before retiring to his own bedroom.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

The Christmas holidays were going great so far. Gwen had returned from her families but she seemed to be busy all the time with photo shoots. Today, though, she was staying at home. It was New Years Eve. James woke up to find that was Gwen in the shower.

"You want to join me sweetie?" shouted Gwen from the shower. James didn't want to. He just wasn't in the mood despite the fact that he'd hardly seen her this holiday let alone done anything with her like that.

"I think I'll just go downstairs for some breakfast," answered James pulling on a pair of jeans. He grabbed a clean t-shirt from his chest of drawers and headed to the kitchen.

He made a detour however when he heard voices coming from the living room. Lily's and Remus's to be specific. The door was opened slightly and he looked through the gap to see what was going on. Remus was stood in front of her looking as though he was trying to prove a point or start an argument. James knew that when Remus's paced whilst talking he was trying to get his point across. He'd done it to James many a time at school when warning him to stop pestering Lily. When he was in this position he meant business.

Lily was trying to ignore Remus the best she could. She was sat on the couch with her feet up and her knees bent so the book that she was trying to read was staying up right against her thighs. She looked annoyed and flicked tough the pages of her book defiantly.

"Come on Lily," said Remus exasperatedly. "You know you love him."

"No I don't," cried Lily stubbornly. "He's a work colleague and a friend."

James grinned. This was a conversation he wanted to hear.

"James and you have always been perfect for each other," explained Remus, ignoring her incredulous look on her face. "You may have spent the first six years knowing him hating him but deep down somewhere in your heart you've always loved him. In seventh year you fell in love with him. Since then you know apart of you will always be in love with him. Whether you actually want to or not."

"Even if what you're saying is right. He's got a girlfriend. A long term girlfriend. He's off limits," Said Lily in a bored drawl. She put the book down and stood up facing Remus. She no longer looked indifferent to the conversation but she did look annoyed. "And don't you think, that by telling me that I'm in love with someone who is in love with someone else, is just rubbing the fact that I'll never have him in? Reminding me that he'll never be mine? Making me realize that no matter how much I want him, he just wants to be with Gwen?" She was nearly in hysterics by now. "What was I thinking staying here? I'm going to get my stuff and go back to Hogwarts."

Before Remus could stop her she had grabbed her book and had hastily exited the room. She was in such a hurry she didn't even see James and walked smack straight into his bare chest. She rebounded off of him and fell to the floor, looking up at him with wide eyes.

"How long have you been there for?" asked Lily, gulping, looking anywhere but his eyes and very lean and muscular chest.

"Long enough to hear that you want to go home," said James with one eyebrow raised. "Any particular reason why? I thought you were having a good time."

"I was. I am," assured Lily. "I, I just think I've overstayed my welcome."

"Of course you haven't," muttered James, as he slipped his blue t-shirt over his head. "Don't ever think that."

"It's my decision not yours," said Lily insolently, still sat on her arse on the wooden floor.

James sighed before holding out his hands to her. She took them gratefully and he pulled her up to her feet easily. She smiled slightly before letting go of his hands and smoothing out the non existent creases on her forest green coloured t-shirt.

"Please don't go," he pleaded, almost silently. She heard him though as she glanced up at him. He looked so cute like that. With his hazel eyes looking ever so hopeful and his lips forming a pout. She smiled and he knew that she was staying.

"Lily an owl came for you," said Lou holding out a letter. "I believe it's from your sister."

Lily retrieved it from Lily quickly and ripped it open rapidly as Gwen went to stand beside James's side as though stating her territory. She'd come downstairs with his mother just then.

Lily looked as though she was about to cry but she hated doing that in front of people. She bit her lip and held her tears in. James knew her and knew she was upset. He went over to her and gently pried the letter from her trembling fingers. He read it quickly and was appalled at what he read.

_To Lily,_

_Please don't ever bother to write again or send presents because they go straight into the bin. Just so you know Vernon and I got married last month and we're glad we didn't invite you. You'd have spoilt my wedding with your dirty magic. You're a horrible freak and I wish you'd never been born. I hate you for what you did to mum and dad. If you're so magic you could have brought them back from the dead. You could have saved them but you didn't. Their favourite daughter betrayed them. They thought you were special but you're not. You're just an evil little bitch who wasn't grateful of their love. You should have been the one that died. You don't deserve to live._

_Petunia_

James dropped the letter and wrapped his arms around Lily letting her release the tears that had been threatening to fall. No one deserved a letter like that from a family member. He smoothed down her hair and whispered soothing words in her ear as she made his t-shirt get steadily wet.

He saw his mother staring at him with a proud look in her hazel eyes. James looked back at her with his matching eyes and appreciated the look in hers. She knew he had grown up but she didn't know he could be this mature and caring. He truly had grown up to be like his father.

Gwen however was annoyed at the touching scene before her. He looked helplessly at her as she stared indignantly at him. His mother, who had picked up and read Lily's letter, explained the situation quietly to her. She gazed apologetically at him. He nodded his head signaling it didn't matter.

He felt Lily's sobs slow down to a halt as her body stopped trembling. He pulled her away from his body softly to look at her face. She had been wearing no make up so she didn't have mascara trailing down her face but her face was tear stained he noticed as he wiped away her last tear gently with his thumb. Her eyes were red ad puffy from all the crying she had just gone. James knew that the two sisters didn't get along but he didn't know how much her sister actually hated her until now. All the hurtful things that Petunia said must have been building up inside Lily who refused to let them show until now.

"Don't you dare listen to a word your sister says to you," said James firmly. "She's just jealous because you're so much better than her. You're more talented, prettier and definitely kinder than her. She's upset about your parent's death and doesn't understand that you can do nothing about it. Death is the next big adventure Dumbledore says, nobody can interfere with it. You're unquestionably not a freak; you're the smartest witch for your age I know. And I should know cause you used to practice your knowledge of jinxes on me when I used to irritate you," He smiled as she chuckled lightly. "You shouldn't even care that she didn't invite you to her wedding. After all you'd look more beautiful than the bride herself and that would just annoy her even more."

Lily smiled serenely at him. "Thank you James that is one of the sweetest things anyone has ever said to me."

"Only one of the sweetest things? Not the sweetest thing?" asked James smirking.

"I'm afraid so," laughed Lily. "You maybe sugary sweet but not the sweetest."

He pouted playfully as she grinned at his playful annoyance.

"Well there is one thing that will cheer everyone up," announced Lou happily. "The New Years Eve party."

Of course how could he have forgotten? Every year the Potter held a party on New Years Eve. It wasn't a ball like the ministry's Christmas one. It was just a regular party so formal dress robes weren't required. Only The elder Potter's friends and James's were invited and of course Gwen's family. New Years Eve wasn't New Years Eve without a Potter Party.

"I can't wait," smiled Lily, completely ignoring the fact she had just broken down in front of everyone. "I'll help you make breakfast Lou."

The pair of women left the hallway chatting happily like old friends as they went into the kitchen to prepare breakfast.

"That was very sweet of you to do for your friend," said Gwen, kissing him overpoweringly. "How very thoughtful of you. I'm going to go finish my make up before we eat." She walked back up the stairs, her hips swaying side to side, as she flicked her hair over her shoulder.

"Very sweet indeed," smirked Remus, leaning against the door frame. "You heard mine and Lily's entire conversation didn't you.

"Yeah how did you know?"

"I'm a werewolf," laughed Remus. "I know your scent I could smell you."

"Why didn't you tell Lily I was eavesdropping then?" asked James curiously.

"Because I thought you ought to hear what she had to say and she wouldn't have admitted her feelings if she knew you were there."

"Did I ever tell you that you were my favourite Marauder?"

"Hey!" came a shout from Sirius, who walked downstairs that very moment. "What about me?"

James and Remus glanced at each other before simultaneously bursting into laughter.

Later on that night the party was in full swing. James was stood next to Gwen talking to her parents.

"So when's the big day then?" asked Annabelle, Gwen's mother. She was in her late forties/early fifties and had bleached blonde hair like her daughter. She still had an incredible figure but it looked like magic had fixed most of it. She dressed stylishly and like a snob.

"What big day?" James asked confused.

"Your wedding day," laughed Michael, Gwen's father. He looked older than his wife with his silvery grey hair and moustache. He had a slightly protruding belly but people could tell in an instant that he was a man of wealth. "Surely you've asked my baby girl to marry you by now?"

Gwen smiled coyly at her parents for bringing up the subject. James didn't know how to answer that question. He couldn't just say no cause they'd start asking him why not. It was a question that needed answering very carefully.

"I'm waiting until my year of teaching is over, sir," said James smartly.

Her parents smiled at him and Gwen grinned in delight. She was going to get what she wanted in a couple of month's time.

"You better treat my darling properly, James," warned Michael. "She deserves lots of love and attention." James actually thought she needed less love and attention as she spoiled quite bit by her parents.

"Don't scare the boy, Michael," scolded Annabelle. "He's going to be a wonderful husband to our baby girl."

This conversation was starting to scare James especially with all the marriage talk. He needed to change the subject or make an excuse to leave. He almost sighed in relief when he spotted Lily. Wow thought James, she was looking gorgeous. She was attractive but she didn't look sluttish at all. She was wearing a dark blue camisole top that was beaded at the top and on the hemline. She wore that with a simple but pretty pale blue shrug. A white skirt swished about her down to her knees. Her feet were attired with pale blue high heels. She had little make-up on but what she did have none accentuated her emerald eyes beautifully. She was wearing the locket, something she had done everyday since Christmas, and some silver hoops. Her wavy red hair had been put up into a loose ponytail and her fringe had been straightened and swept to the side.

She looked so different compared to Gwen. Gwen had plastered her face with make up but it was perfectly done and looked stunning. Her blonde hair was straightened and flowed over her shoulders. She was wearing a bright pink camisole top with a denim mini skirt, pink stilettos and a sparkly pink belt to go with it.

James himself looked casual but nice at the same time. He was wearing a black shirt, untucked, with a few top buttons unbuttoned to show some of his muscular chest. Also some black jeans and a smart pair of black trainers. He looked very attractive if he did say so himself.

He gestured to Lily to come to him. She walked over to him, with a glass of gin and tonic in hand.

"Michael, Annabelle this is Lily Evans, she's my co-worker and one of my oldest friends from Hogwarts. Lily, these are Michael and Annabelle Barker, Gwen's parents. Both of them are important figures in the Ministry Of Magic."

"It's a pleasure to meet you Mr and Mrs Barker," said Lily politely, holding out her hand for them to shake. They did so rather stiffly James noticed.

"Same to you Miss Evan. It is Miss isn't it?" asked Michael rather rudely.

"Yes sir," said Lily staring him straight in the eye. He didn't scare her; he didn't even particularly annoy her. "I haven't been as lucky in love as your daughter has."

"I don't think no one has been," smiled Annabelle. "James is just perfect."

Gwen grinned at Lily triumphantly. Lily raised her eyebrows at her remark.

"Perfect?" laughed Lily. "James is far from perfect, Mrs Barker. You just haven't met the real James."

And with that she smiled sweetly at James and walked off leaving him rendered speechless.

"What did that rude girl mean by that," asked Michael sternly.

"I have no idea," replied James dazedly, staring in the direction she had gone. "No idea at all…"


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

It was nearing midnight and James had only just managed to slip away from the numerous people trying to talk to him. All his former team mates had been invited and they had all wanted to catch up with him. He'd been stuck talking to Gwen's parents again before his mother saved him only to talk to one of her friends who was a former professor of Hogwarts herself who wanted to know of all the changes made there. The Marauders had rescued him from that slightly insane woman. He had then met Hannah, Remus's current girlfriend.

Hannah, James thought, was perfect for Remus. He'd told her of his condition and she still loved him. Sure, they hadn't been together for very long but they were ideal for each other. Hannah had short spiky brown hair and big chocolate brown eyes. She wasn't supermodel tall like Gwen was but she wasn't short like Lily was. She came to the tip of James's nose and James was a good six foot two. She had a wacky personality and it showed through her clothes. Tonight she was attired in a bright yellow t-shirt featuring a picture of The Fizzing Wand, the hottest new wizarding band around, with a bright orange mini skirt and matching high heels. She certainly was a character. Completely the opposite of Remus, who was quieter than her, but she seemed to bring him out of his shell, in a way that Sirius and him used to do at school.

After talking to the Marauders and meeting Hannah, he ended up chatting to Alice and frank. He hadn't talked to them properly since he started teaching. Apparently they were trying for a baby but had little time to because they were aurors and rushed off their feet. It was nice catching up with the round faced blonde and the broad shouldered brunette. Although the three of them hadn't been best friends at Hogwarts, he had shared a dormitory with Frank for seven years and he got to know Alice in attempt to get Lily to like him and they'd all remained good friends.

James went out onto the snow covered balcony to find Lily leaning against the balcony wall staring up at the stars as snowflakes dropped into her tied up red waves.

"Hey," he said gently, as he went to join her, resting his elbows on the wall.

"Hi," she replied just as softly. "What are you doing out here?"

"I was looking for you," said James firmly, wanting to get to the point. "What the hell were you on about when you were telling Gwen's parents that they haven't met the real me and that I'm not perfect?"

"You're not perfect though and everyone who doesn't know you that well thinks you are," said Lily, turning around to face him.

"That doesn't mean you have to tell my future in laws that I'm not."

"You've proposed to Gwen?" asked Lily quietly. Her tone and expression had changed completely. She had gone from being sure of her self to being what James thought was hurt. She stared at the floor trying to escape his gaze.

"No," said James. "Of course I haven't but I'm mostly likely going to have to do it someday therefore that makes them my future in laws."

"Oh," said Lily embarrassed, a pink hue traveling across her cheeks. "Right, well then they should know of their future son in laws imperfections."

"Then what are these so called imperfections?" asked James curiously.

Lily stared into his beautiful hazel eyes with her own emerald ones. They were reassuring and twinkling playfully with curiosity.

"If you really want to know…" Lily trailed off grinning. "You're too smart for your own good. You have this stupid heroic thing inside you that makes you want to save the day. You love it when there's a damsel in distress and you can be her knight on a shining broomstick. If you have an argument with someone you have to win with some kind of witty remark with that cocky lopsided grin on your face. You're too quidditch orientated and you have to be better at everyone else at everything. All that and you cheated on their precious daughter by kissing me."

James raised one eyebrow at her and the very same cocky lopsided grin she was just talking about formed on his face.

"Is that all?" smirked James. "I thought you'd actually say something bad about me. Who cares if I'm smart, so are you but you don't hear me complaining about it. I like helping people what's wrong with that? You weren't being unreasonable when I saved your life a week ago. Everybody likes to win arguments. That's the point in having them in the first place. I was a world class professional quidditch player. Of course I'm going to care about it an awful lot. I have never wanted to be the best at everything I've just wanted to be the best I can be."

"Don't you have anything to say about the kiss?"

"It takes two to tango flower," said James staring determinedly into her eyes. She stared back with as much fortitude as him. They space between them seemed to be getting closer. He could now see the light sprinkle of freckles that were sprayed across the bridge of her nose. He could feel her hot breath against his neck. He could hear the faint countdown to midnight coming from inside. _Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one. _He cupped her face and pressed his lips against hers hard. Before she had time she had registered what was happening or had time to respond, he pulled away from her. Her fingers traveled up to her lips, just where his had been moments before, as she traced them lightly.

"What the hell was that for?" murmured Lily, her eyes widening.

"It's tradition to kiss the person you're with at the end of the New Year's countdown," said James smartly, with a brazen smile on his face. "Happy New Year's flower."

He left Lily on the balcony to join his friends and family in the room once again.

"Where were you when it turned midnight?" asked Gwen, hooking onto his arm. "You weren't here to give me a New Years Eve kiss."

"Sorry," smiled James. "There were some things I had to take care off and I lost track off time."

"You can make it up to me by dancing with me," said Gwen, as she dragged him onto the dance floor not letting him even have a say.

He held her waist loosely as she grinded against him to the music. As a guy, he should be very turned on by now, supermodels know what buttons to press to make men do anything they want, but he just wasn't feeling anything for her at the moment. Confused was the only thing he was feeling. He needed a Marauder talk.

"Hey, I just need to do something, I'll be right back," He left before she could get a word in. He found Remus and Sirius with Hannah by the bar. He grabbed the two of them, whilst muttering a quick apology to Hannah and dragged them into a secluded corner.

"What is so important that you had to drag us away from everyone?" asked Sirius bemused.

"It's about Lily."

"Has something bad happened to her?" asked Remus concerned.

"You could say that," said James, running a hand through his messy hair. "I just did something really stupid and she'll either really hate me or just ignore me forever and ever.

"What did you do?" smirked Sirius.

"I kissed her," admitted James, closing his eyes anxious of his friend's reactions.

"Wow," said Sirius.

"Yeah wow," agreed Remus.

"So what are you going to do about it?" asked Sirius nosily.

"I have no idea," confessed James honestly. "It didn't mean anything. Well it did but I was just caught up in the moment. It was hardly even a kiss. I just touched my lips to hers then pulled back before she could respond or I could get into it. She was just so close, and I could feel her breath on me. It was just an impulse and I acted on it."

"Are you going to tell Gwen?" asked Remus seriously. James looked at him as though he was crazy.

"What the hell kind is that!?! Of course I'm not going to tell Gwen. She'd blow it out of proportion and make a big deal about it."

"It kind of is a big deal James. You kissed another woman," smirked Sirius. "Even I don't do that and I have a different girl everyday of the week."

"It wasn't like I shagged her," defended James. "My lips just brushed against her. I've seen you two kiss her like that before. It was just a friendly kiss. Yeah just a friendly kiss…"

"If it was just a friendly kiss, then why are you making a big deal about it?" inquired Remus, already knowing the answer even if James didn't.

The two Marauders left James to ponder about what Remus had just said. James glanced around the room and saw Lily talking to his mother about something he didn't know. They were both smiling and laughing with each other as though they knew each other for years instead of only a week. Gwen rarely talked to his mother unless it was necessary and even then it was a very stiff conversation. She didn't get on with Remus or Sirius either. Lily was so much more outgoing. She must have sensed someone was watching her as she looked around and their eyes soon made eye contact. She looked at him with her eyes full of questions, before turning back round to his mother with a fake smile plastered on her face.

James sighed before heading to the bar for the strongest drink they had. Boy did he need it.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

The Christmas holidays were soon over and it was back to Hogwarts for James and Lily. The tow hadn't really talked since James kissed her as she seemed to be trying to avoid him. Remus and Sirius kept giving him knowing looks every time they caught him staring at Lily as he struggled to figure out what was going on inside the messed up head of his.

Dumbledore had told James to meet him in his office after dinner for a private meeting. James knew it was something to do with the Order. It had to be. In true James fashion he was ten minutes late even after running all the way there.

"Hey sorry I'm late, I was just marking some of my third year's essays and I lost track of time-" rambled James before Dumbledore interrupted him.

"It's ok James," assured Dumbledore. "Lily herself only arrived here mere minutes ago."

James hadn't even noticed she was sat in one of the chairs in front of him. He simply nodded before sitting himself down in the comfy chair next to her.

"I believe you two know that this is an Order meeting," said Dumbledore as James and Lily nodded politely. "I need you two to go on a mission for me."

"What kind of mission?" asked James inquisitively, sitting up straight in the chair.

"We need to know what Voldemort's planning next or if anything big is going to happen," explained Dumbledore, his blue eyes containing no sparkle. "We know that a few unimportant death eaters have drinks in a bar in London. With the right manipulation and tactics you two can get the information out of them easily."

"Sir, we're not exactly the best people for the job," reasoned Lily. "I mean, they tried to kill James and threatened to kill me to get to him. Wouldn't it be better to get some other people to do it instead?"

"No you're the best people for the job and I you can easily use magic to change your appearance," replied Dumbledore. "You two have the best qualities for the job. James is a Marauder. He's got street smarts better than anyone I know, and he's a quick thinker in case the situation goes bad. He can trick or con anyone to get the right info. And you Lily, there's something about you that can make a man do anything you wanted."

"Damn right," muttered James.

"And what exactly do you mean by that?" snapped Lily.

"It means you can charm a man to do absolutely anything and I mean anything. You're a tease."

"I am not," said Lily. "It's not my fault that men don't have any willpower."

"Yeah especially horny death eaters."

"What exactly do you think I'm going to do to require what we need?"

"I don't know that depends how far you're going to sell yourself."

"Enough," proclaimed Dumbledore. "No one is going to be selling themselves. I did not mean that Lily was chosen because she's a whore, she's the opposite and I will have nobody insult her by saying otherwise."

James nodded, ashamed of what he had implied. "Sorry Lily, you know I didn't mean any of that. I've just been frustrated lately and I let it out on you."

"It's ok," said Lily, forgiving him. "I understand."

James knew that she really did understand. She knew exactly why he was frustrated.

Friday couldn't have come any quicker for James. He was stood looking at his reflection in the full length mirror. He was wearing his scruffiest pair of jeans and an old grey t-shirt under a shabby robe. He had lengthened his hair so it brushed his shoulders and he had transformed it blonde. He had made his nose slightly larger and changed his exquisite hazel eyes into stormy grey orbs.

A knock on his door interrupted him in his thoughts of his new self. Without even answering, the door flung open to reveal Lily, wearing her usual clothes with a bag round her shoulder.

"Is it ok if I get ready in your bathroom?" she asked timidly.

"Yeah sure, go right ahead," smiled James. She smiled gratefully before heading straight in there.

"I've been thinking Lily," announced James, sitting down on his bed, after he heard the bathroom door click shut. "We need names."

"What do you mean?" called back Lily.

"Well we can't say that our names are Lily and James. It's far too suspicious," cleared James. "Therefore we need to think of some new names."

"That does make a lot of sense. What are you going to be called?"

"How about Demetrius?"

"It's nice. I need a very irresistible name now," laughed Lily. "What do you think about Roxie?"

"It's good. So we're Roxie and Demetrius."

"Pleased to meet you Demetrius," said Lily, in a velvety soft voice, leaning against the door frame. "How do I look?"

James turned to see her and his breath caught in his throat. She was wearing a tight, fake leather, black dress that barely covered her bottom. It was alter neck and was very low cut. It was so tight on top that her breasts were nearly popping out. She had turned her hair colour to a dark brown that was straight and down. It was shorter than it usually was as it went to just below her shoulders. Her eyes were an incredibly dark brown that looked black and they were small and seductive. Especially with the smoky black eye make up. She had made herself taller so she was only two inches shorter than James. Her now longer legs were adorned in black, matching to the dress, knee high heeled boots. Her usual pale creamy skinned was now goldenly tanned.

"You look like a slut," James remarked, looking her up and down appreciatively. "You're gorgeous."

"Good, sluttish was the look I was going for," laughed Lily. "You're looking quite nice yourself Demetrius."

"Thanks a lot Roxie," smirked James. "Are you ready to go?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," muttered Lily as she made her way out of his room with her hips swaying alluringly. James grinned and licked his lips before following behind her.

The pub that they were told to be looked filthy on the outside and they figured it would be the same on the inside. They were round the corner from it and they were just spending a few minutes going over the plan.

"Right, you play the part of a tart and use your womanly figure and natural seductive charm to get the information of some horny deatheater," said James as Lily pulled her top more down and the skirt higher up.

"Right," agreed Lily, finishing the final touches of her sex appeal. "And you are some random guy that wants to know stuff and you use your clever marauder tricks to get to the information."

"That's sorted than," said James quietly. "I'll go in first. You wait five minutes before following me in. Stay safe." He gave her a brief savouring hug before entering the suspicious grubby pub.

The pub was just as filthy on the inside as it was on the outside. It certainly wasn't as nice as Madam Rosmerta's. The bar looked like it was covered inch thick with dust. The seats were dark with dirt. He really didn't want to drink out of their glasses here either. They were worse than the ones at the Hog's Head. He gave the room an inconspicuous glance around before sitting himself down at the bar next to what he presumed was a guy because he was concealed behind a dark grimy cloak.

He ordered a firewhiskey from the barman and sipped it quietly.

"Wow look at the body on her," muttered the guy next to him, before whistling softly. James looked over to the door and saw that Lily had entered. All eyes were on her, staring at her like she was a piece of meat while she just smirked flirtatiously.

"Yeah she's something," replied James, offhandedly to the guy. "I'm Demetrius." He held out his hand.

"Davie, pleased to meet you," Davie answered as he shook his hand. "Demetrius sounds a bit foreign. Where are you from?"

"I'm English but my grandfather was Greek and I was named after him," lied James successfully. "I have been traveling though so I know none of what is happening in England at the moment."

"A hell of a lot," chuckled Davie darkly. "Have you heard of the Dark Lord?"

"Of course," said James firmly. "He is infamous in some of the places I have been to. It would be a great honour to meet him."

"You seem like a good pureblood man then. Do you believe in what the Dark Lord does?"

"Of course. Mudbloods are dirty. They don't deserve to live let alone perform magic." James hated himself for what he was saying but he had to do it.

"I'd tell you more about him and his plans but I cant, he'd kill me if I told you," said Davie seriously, with a hint of fear in his deep scratchy voice.

"I understand," said James lightheartedly. "Let me buy you a firewhiskey."

Ten firewhiskeys later and the man was so drunk he had told James everything he had needed to know. Davie was currently slumped unconscious over the bar. He glanced over to where Lily was. She was playing pool with a group of men. At the moment she was taking her shot facing him. Noticing he was staring she winked cheekily before taking her shot. She got it in. All the guys she was with had been checking out her arse as she was leaning over the pool table. It made James's blood boil with anger but he knew if he did anything it would ruin their plan.

A dark haired man came up from behind Lily, placed his hands low on her waist and whispered something in her ear. She nodded. James watched them as they left the pub together. What the hell are they doing, thought James, this isn't the plan. She isn't meant to be alone with one of these guys. They're suspected death eaters for god's sake!

He followed them unnoticeably as he saw them go down an unused alleyway. He dodged behind a dumpster and watched them silently. The guy had Lily with her back pressed against the wall and him with his hands on the wall either side of her head. The bodies were close, touching in fact. The guy leant down and kissed Lily roughly, his hands now exploring her body. James couldn't bear to look anymore. He knew she'd have some kind of plan and was capable of taking care of her self so he turned and looked the way.

Less than fifteen minutes later he heard a scream. Lily's scream. He shot up from behind the dumpster and stupefied the death eater straightaway. He sighed in relief as he watched the guy slump to the concrete floor. He ran over to Lily who was sat on the floor with her knees hugged up to her chest. She looked up at him soundlessly and he saw the tears streaming down her beautiful face. He felt so angry with himself. How could he let this happen when he was only a few metres away?

"What happened?" He asked gently, as he cupped her face in hands softly and wiped away her tears with his thumbs.

"I only came out here with him because I thought if I kissed him a bit then he'd tell me more things," explained Lily, miserably. "But he went too far. He wouldn't take his mouth away from mine so I couldn't scream or anything. He kept putting his hand up my dress and then he started unzipping his trousers and I-I-I didn't know what to do. I was just wishing you'd come and save me so badly." Tears were cascading down her cheeks more rapidly now.

James had only just noticed how bad a state she was in. Her dress was had risen all the way up to her waist where he had pushed it up and it was ripped at the top. She had bruises on her wrists from where he had held her so roughly.

"I am so sorry Lily," muttered James, holding her close to him. "This is my entire fault."

"How's it your fault?" asked Lily, bemused.

"I was behind that dumpster the whole time it was happening. I should have been keeping my eye on you but I couldn't bear to see him kiss you or put his hands where mine belong."

Lily gasped softly, understanding his meaning. His now stormy grey eyes searched her now dark brown ones. He seemed to find an answer as he leaned down to her and brushed his lips against hers. She responded with a heated passion and when his tongue ran along her bottom lip she let it enter her mouth immediately. She was still sat on his lap and now she had her hands entwined within his blonde hair. He had his arms around her waist securely. They parted, both desperate for air but for each other. They were breathing deeply with their foreheads touching.

"I can't," whispered Lily. "You're drunk."

"No I'm not."

"I saw you drinking a load of firewhiskey with that guy."

"I didn't drink any of it," explained James. "I was vanishing it. "I'm completely sober and I know what I'm doing."

To prove it he pressed his lips against hers again, but briefly.

"I want you," he whispered pleadingly. "The real you though. Not this stupid disguise." He waved his wand and the pair of them, were back to their original selves. "That's better. I love your red hair so it's much better than brown." He ran his hands through her lovingly.

"And I can't live without your hazel eyes," smiled Lily, gazing into them. He kissed her softly again.

"Let's not stay here," murmured James. "Dumbledore has booked us a double room in a hotel in so we didn't have to go back to Hogwarts in the early hours of the morning."

He stood up, gently bringing her up with him. He spent a minute sorting out her dress so she looked decent. Because she was back to her normal height the dress was now a lot longer on her and it came to her knees. It still looked sexy on her thought James.

"We'll apparate there," said James, tucking a strand of red hair behind her ear. "Hold on tight."

"Don't worry I will," smirked Lily, as she wrapped her arms tightly around his waist and rested her head upon his lean muscular chest. Within a loud crack later they were gone.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

The hotel was small but nice. Despite the late hour, the woman the receptionist still had a cheery on her highly made up face.

"We have a room booked under the name Potter," said James as professionally as he could with Lily clinging onto his waist. The girl drove his hormones crazy.

"Oh my god you're James Potter," squealed the young woman, now shooting daggers at Lily who shot them right back. Sensing her discomfort towards the reception he tightened his grip on her. She relaxed in to him and smiled sweetly at the seemingly jealous receptionist.

"I seem to be so," grinned James and Lily held back a giggle.

"Please can I have your autograph?" asked the woman, smiling flirtatiously, completely ignoring Lily. "My friends would be so jealous."

"Ok then, but I'll have to make it quick cause we've got to get to our rooms," said James, smiling at Lily much to the woman's annoyance. "Do you have a pen?"

The woman handed him a black pen and a note pad where he signed his loopy signature effortlessly before she handed him the key to their room.

"Thanks," he said politely before hurrying to his room with Lily.

As soon as they had closed the door, James had Lily's back against it and kissed her feverishly. She moaned into his mouth and wrapped her legs firmly around his waist. James had one hand nestled in her lovely long red hair and the other as gripping her thigh. He could feel Lily her hardest to kick her boots off but they were super tight. He broke the kiss, resting his forehead against hers lovingly.

"I want you," breathed James, with a look in his eye that was clearly desire. His beautiful hazel eyes were burning with desire. If Lily didn't know James as well as she did she would be scared of the intensity of them. That was just James though. James's eyes were like crystal balls. You needed the gift to read them. Lily had that gift.

She didn't answer him; she simply pressed her lips against his and wrapped her arms around his neck. James staggered back and gripped onto Lily harder until the back of his legs found one of the double beds. He let himself fall back on it with Lily on top of him. His hands wandered up and down her body slowly, every second his yearning for her grew bigger, as their tongues were in battle. It wasn't soft gentle kisses they shared, they were lustful and passionate.

He could feel Lily pulling him up in a sitting position so he let her guide his body, without breaking the scorching kiss. She slipped her hands under his t-shirt and let them roam his lean muscular chest. He shivered, enjoying the sensations she could give him by purely touching him. He could feel her pushing the t-shirt slowly up and he couldn't wait any longer. He grabbed her hands and pulled his top off of him, unfortunately their mouths had to part. Lily grinned and pushed him down on his back, straddling him once more. She trailed kisses from his jaw bone all the way down to the top of his trousers. James could bear it no longer and using little strength flipped them over so he was on top. He also decided it wasn't fair that she had more clothes on than him.

Starting just above her knee he kissed the inside of her thigh, dragging his mouth slowly further upwards. When he reached the end the dress he carried on kissing and used his hands to push the dress up. He kissed all of her wonderfully flat stomach and up between her breasts as he pulled the dress up further. Soon his lips were on hers again as he pulled the black dress completely off over her head. She had somehow managed to already to take her boots off earlier and was now only covered by her black lace matching bra and panties. He broke the kiss to look down at her body.

"You're so beautiful," he muttered, ignoring the shade of red her cheeks became and kissed her again. This kiss was different. It was passionate but gentle. It was slow and loving, not the quick hard heated kisses like their last. He could feel one of her arms wrap around his neck and the other had sunk lower to undo his trousers. He used one of his to cup her face lovingly and the other to unclip and take off her bra skillfully. After that he let both of his hands slide her panties off and she tugged his boxers down. He used his feet to kick them off completely. They were both naked and both knew what they wanted. He entered her slowly, not knowing how long it was since she last did this, he didn't want to hurt her. She gasped at first but soon they had both picked up a fast pace. It wasn't just sex, they knew it was more.

James knew he would come any minute now but he didn't want to, at least not until she had. Suddenly he felt her body tremble under his and she dug her fingernails into his back as she cried out in ecstasy. That was all it took to send James over the edge and a second later he was crying out in his own ecstasy. He rolled off of her onto the bed. He stared at the off white coloured sealing as he caught his breath back. He could tell by deep breaths he was hearing from beside him that so was Lily. He turned on his side to face her, she looked gorgeous. Her naked body was glistening in the after sex glow. She turned her head to look at him and smiled. He grinned back and she cuddled up against him. Within minutes her breathing had slowed down and he knew she had drifted off to sleep. He bent his head down slightly to kiss her forehead softly. It wasn't too long before he joined her in the land of dreams.

James was woken by the stirring of Lily beside him. He cracked his eyes open slowly to adjust to the light. Lily was lying on his chest, smiling sheepishly up at him.

"Did I wake you?"

"No," said James, smiling. "Well yeah you did but I would have woken up soon anyways so it doesn't matter."

Lily rolled her eyes and leant up to give him a quick kiss. "How about, you go have a shower, get dressed then I'll shower while you go get us some breakfast?"

"I'd much rather stay snuggled up to you," pouted James, holding her closer to him.

Lily sat herself up, wrapping the sheets around her. "We don't have to go straight back to Hogwarts after breakfast," she said in total innocence even though James knew what she probably had in mind wasn't too innocent.

"OK then shower, clothes, breakfast it is," said James grinning. "It's a good job Dumbledore ordered some house elves to send some clothes over for us before hand."

"Yeah," said Lily, pressing herself up against him more, wrapping her arms around him and started twiddling the end of his hair at the nape of his neck idly. "Demetrius's taste in clothes was a bit too shabby for my liking."

"Is that so?" he whispered into her ear teasingly.

"Yep," replied Lily absentmindedly, enjoying the feel of his warm breath on her neck. Especially as he started to suck lightly on the little patch of skin just below her ear. It was her weak spot and James knew it. "Stop it James, otherwise we're going to be here all day."

He stopped reluctantly and pressed a light kiss to her temple before getting up out of bed.

"You really don't care at all do you," cried Lily from the bed as James turned on the shower letting the hot water trickle down his body.

"What do you mean," James shouted back bemused.

"You just walked completely naked from the bed to the shower," explained Lily. "I would have at least wrapped one of the sheets around me."

"That's because you are too self conscience. Although, you have no reason to be, you're gorgeous," smirked James, despite the fact he couldn't see her he knew that her cheeks had been tinged with a pleasant crimson colour. "Besides what's the point? We've both seen each other naked before. Last night kind of proved that don't you think. And if I remember correctly, that wasn't exactly our first time together, therefore I've seen your naked body and vice versa quite a few times."

The only response he received was a rather muffled one. He laughed knowing he had won that disagreement.

A few minutes later he entered the bedroom with a towel wrapped around his waist. He ran a hand through his hair and water droplets ran down his chiseled physique.

"Towel better on or off?" smirked James, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

Lily grinned and cocked her head to the side slightly to one side in mock thought. "Definitely off."

Half an hour and one shared shower later, James was walking into a lobby. In daylight, and without Lily with him, he realized that it wasn't a small hotel that he had first thought. It was Magique. One of the biggest hotel chains in England and France. How he didn't recognize it last night was beyond him. His family owned half of it and was mainly in charge of the English hotels whereas the **Devereux's, the** French family, the Potter's were partners were with ran the French hotels.

He had dated the youngest Devereux daughter, Camille, about three years ago. The Devereux's had been delighted while the two had dated and James's parents had worried what the Devereux's would do when the couple split. After all, one of their businesses would be in jeopardy. It was all ok though when a week after they had split Camille announced she was in love with the French minister of magic's son. James figured she had a thing for them. After all, at the time he was the British minister of magic's son.

He was so busy musing over the hotel that he managed to bump into someone.

"Sorry about that mate," apologized James, getting a look at the man. He recollected the face from somewhere but he just couldn't remember who he was. Short curly blonde hair, pale blue eyes… Ethan. James grabbed Ethan's collar and pushed him up against the wall.

"Hey what the hell do you think you're doing," stammered Ethan, obviously afraid. Anyone would be under the wrath of James Potter. He had a long fuse but when it exploded he was in a deathly rage. "I'll get security on you."

"Unfortunately for you, my family has a large share in this hotel chain so security wouldn't dare do anything to me. I could fire them in a heartbeat," smirked James evilly. "I could also punch your lights out in a heartbeat as well."

"I'm sorry," spluttered out Ethan, not daring to look James in the eye. "I didn't know it was your girlfriend, but don't worry the baby's yours not mine."

James let Ethan go in confusion. "I was talking about what you did to Lily. What baby?"

"He's talking about our baby James," said a feminine voice, a few metres away from them.

James looked up to see Gwen with her hands with on what was undoubtedly her pregnant belly. It was only a small bump but there was a definitely a bump. It hadn't been there at Christmas but it was a month since then so it had time to grow.

"You're… I'm going to be a… you're going to be a… we're going to be…" It was James turn to stammer as he looked at his girlfriend's stomach. His life had been turned upside down in an instant.

She nodded her head slowly as if talking to a child. Unluckily for her it gave James's mind to catch up.

"Hey wait a minute he was just telling me that the baby was mine and not his," said James accusingly. "That means it was you he cheated on Lily with." James knew being angry at her was being hypocritical as he thought of what Lily and he did les than twenty four hours ago.

"James I didn't mean to I swear," pleaded Gwen. "I was drunk and I didn't know what I was doing. The baby is yours."

"How do I know that?" said James crazily. "It might be his or any other guy you've slept with recently."

"Ethan was the only one I promise," said Gwen in shame. "We went to St.Mungos this morning. He gave some of his DNA and it wasn't a match to the baby's. It has to be yours."

"Why should I believe you?" asked James, looking her dead in the eye. "You slept with my best friend's boyfriend behind both mine and hers back. You both succeeded in making her distraught. She got completely drunk out of her head because of the two of you; she was that upset she didn't even recognise that it was you Gwen."

"She's not just a friend," scoffed Gwen. "You and I both know she's more than that. I was with you both at Christmas. The way you held her when she was crying. The way you were when she was attacked by You-Know-You. God, even You-Know-You knew she's the one you love."

"Voldemort's information came from deatheaters we knew at school, they were stupid to think I still love her," said James calmly. "Sure, I'll admit, I like her. I mean how could I not? I loved her during Hogwarts and love can't just go away. But I'm just her friend."

"Well I feel like I'm second best," screeched Gwen. "Even your parents are crazy about her. All I heard from them all Christmas was Lily this and Lily that."

"What about me?"


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

James watched in horror as Lily's eyes traveled from James to Ethan to Gwen and finally rested on Gwen's tiny baby bump. The colour from Lily's face drained significantly

"What is she doing here?" shrieked Gwen. "Where ever you are James she's always there right next to you. What the hell are you doing here in a hotel together?"

"Dumbledore sent us here," said James evenly, sending her a knowing look. Although Gwen wasn't in the order she knew about it and knew what James meant. "Besides you couldn't exactly say anything we weren't there for that, what with prince charming stood here."

"You know I didn't mean for that James," pleaded Gwen, strands of her platinum blonde hair fall free of the ponytail it was in. "I was drunk and Ethan was just there."

"Ethan?" said Lily bemused. "It was _you _who he slept with that night?"

"Lily please don't," said James softly, knowing she'd only end up getting hurt.

"No James," she said, and he could tell she was trying to choke back tears. "I can't believe you spent Christmas with me knowing that you had slept with my boyfriend. Especially, because you're with James, you might have been able to laugh at me behind my back but not James's. Yet you did. You're heartless. I feel sorry for that baby. It's only hope in life is James. Cause I know, that despite what you've done to him, he will treat you and your child with the love and attention that probably you don't but the baby does deserve."

She turned and marched down the corridor despite James's protests.

"Sometimes I can't believe you Gwen," said James angrily, shaking his head in disgust at her. "I've got to go. Dumbledore needs me back at Hogwarts. I'll talk to you later about us and the baby."

He headed down the same corridor that Lily had minutes before knowing full well that Gwen's baby blue eyes were staring helplessly into the back of his head. He walked into the hotel room to find Lily making the bed furiously, muttering to herself. She looked as though she was going to burst into tears any second. James realized, it wasn't just his world that had turned upside down, hers had too. Theoretically his had turned for the better whereas hers had for the worse. Dramatically worse.

"That's why hotels have maids, you know," said James stupidly and awkwardly from the doorframe. "You don't have to do that."

"I know that you jerk," spat Lily angrily, not even looking at him. "I'm not that brainless. I'm doing it to keep my mind off other things." She was shaking now. "I'm doing it so I don't break down." She struggled to speak clearly, as the urge to cry was overwhelming her. "I'm doing it so I can't throw something at you." She was gripping the sheet so tight that her knuckle had turned drip white. She collapsed onto the bed and tears poured out of her eyes as she started to sob.

James hurried over towards the bed and tried to put his arm around her, to comfort her, but he stopped when she visibly flinched at the mere touch of him.

"Why did you do it to me?" asked Lily, through her tears, desperately wanting an answer. "It would have been so much easier."

"Why did I do what to you?" asked James confused. He knew she'd be upset but she seem hysterical about something and it wasn't the baby. At least not directly anyways.

"Why did you make me fall in love with you again," she wept before burying her head in the feather filled pillows. James sighed. He knew exactly how she felt. He let her cry her heart out. Knowing it all had to come out, she wouldn't be able to function otherwise. He absentmindedly stroked her hair and drew lazy circle on her back as she sobbed into the pillow. His presence was comforting to her in a strange way.

As the sobs subsided and her breathing became lighter, he became ware that she had fallen asleep. He stared miserably at her. Why couldn't life be kind on the two of them and let them be together? There was always something in the way. He bent, brushed her red tresses away from her face and whispered into her ear, "I fell in love with you too."

He smiled sadly as he realized that he had loved and lost her all within the space of twenty four hours. The mission at the grubby little bar didn't seem like last night it felt like weeks ago.

When Lily woke up after having just over an hours sleep he didn't try and force fake and cheery conversation. They flooed over to Hogwarts from the hotel room's fireplace after getting there stuff ready in a forlorn silence.

They hadn't flooed directly into Dumbledore's office but into McGonagall's unused one.

"You go get some rest or something," said James softly. "I'll go talk to Dumbledore. It only takes one of us to do it."

She only nodded and scurried off probably to the depths of the library to find a book to get her lost in. He knew her well and he knew when she had something troubling her or if she was upset, reading was her way out of it.

James muttered the sweet orientated password to the gargoyles and let the spiraling staircase take him up. He knocked on the door politely before entering the aging wizard's office.

"No Miss Evans with you James?" asked Dumbledore, as James sat down in the chair that Dumbledore gestured to.

"She was tired, sir, I hope you don't mind," said James, declining a lemon sherbet.

"Of course not," smiled Dumbledore. "But now we need to get down to business. What information did you mange to obtain last night?"

"They weren't too keen to share at first," explained James, with a hint of smirk at the corners of his lips. "But with the correct _persuasion _we did manage to find some things out. Voldemort's not actually planning something major at the moment. If he is then he's not sharing it with all his death eaters. Muggle killings mainly. I'd put up some wards around the homes of muggleborn student's houses if I were you sir. This guy was showing off about how he was going to kill all the parents of the students here. It was probably just talk. Trying to make himself look big in front of all the scum in there but you can never be too careful."

"I know that indeed," said Dumbledore gravely. "Did Miss Evans find out anything different to that?"

"Not really," said James, running a hand through his hair. "Just his usual scare tactics."

"What's the matter with Miss Evans?"

"Pardon?" said James surprised and confused.

"Is there something troubling Miss Evans?" asked Dumbledore. "I know that she'd report here afterwards despite how tired she is. She is incredibly stubborn like that."

James smiled sadly. "She's predictable yet unpredictable all at the same time. Some deatheater guy got a bit sexually rough with her. Nothing happened though. Neither she nor I would let that happen. I think it shook her up a bit. She'll be fine I think. I'll check on her after this."

Dumbledore nodded understanding. "I've got nothing else really to say so you might as well go to her now."

"Thanks, I'll see you later sir."

James left the office and hurried down to the musty old library. Sure enough, Lily was sat right at the back in the privacy of the restricted section. She was curled up on one of dusty red armchairs with a big heavy book on her lap. She didn't even notice him leaning against a bookshelf watching her. She was too engrossed in her book. Her long red waves had been tied up into a high ponytail and her face was free of any make up. She looks beautiful thought James sadly.

"Are you going to stand there mournfully all day or are you going to come sit down and say hi?" asked Lily, not taking her eyes off the book.

James wondered how the hell she knew he was there when he was practically silent and she didn't see him. He figured she could feel his presence. He went and sat himself down next to her. She put her book down and turned to face him.

"Congratulations," she said staring him straight in the eye, displaying no emotions what so ever.

"Thanks I think," said James, staring right back.

"I always knew you'd be the first Marauder to have a kid," admitted Lily.

"What!?!" exclaimed James. "You can't be serious."

Lily nodded. "Well think about it. Sirius likes the bachelor lifestyle too much, Remus is too picky and shy about those kind of things and Peter…well you know what I mean. You though, you were always the leader of the group. You were the mature one. You were head boy after all. You're definitely the first Marauder to be ready."

James stared into the depths of her emerald orbs as he came to a realization. She was right. He was ready. He just wasn't ready with Gwen.

"Are you ok about it?"

"That's such a stupid question to ask," laughed Lily bitterly. "I'll survive. Do you know what's funny though?"

James cocked his head to one side in a questioningly manner.

"I spent Christmas with Gwen and I didn't even realize it was her I saw with Ethan that night," said Lily, her eyes glazing over with fresh tears. "My head must have been so screwed up that night that I just blocked the memory of her out."

"She should have come clean about that," said James softly. "She was being cowardly by not admitting it. I don't think I'll ever forgive her for doing that to you. Or doing that to me for that matter as well."

"James," said Lily gently. "Forgive her. For the baby. Don't let that little baby grow up with miserable parents. Do it for me. I want you to be happy. For the baby's life to be happy. In some respects I want Gwen to be happy with the life I never had the chance to have with you."

James nodded standing up. "Just so you know Lily. You made me fall in love with you again as well."

He left the library and he felt his heart breaking as he heard the almost silent sobs coming from Lily.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

James groaned as rays of sunshine filtered through his curtains. He'd hardly slept at all last night and he deserved it. He'd slept with Lily behind his pregnant girlfriend's back. Of course, he didn't know she was pregnant at the time but it was still a horrible thing to do. His mind kept him awake because he was confused. He had done an incredibly wrong thing yet it felt so incredibly right.

He managed to get his exhausted body out of bed and into the shower. He tensed up at first as the scolding hot water trickled down his toned body but he soon relaxed as the shower soothed him and his troubles.

Twenty minutes later he was walking down the corridors of Hogwarts wearing a black shirt, grey trousers and a silver tie. His raven black hair looked as messy yet sexy as ever. In fact he thought he looked quite good for someone who'd probably only had two hours sleep.

The Great Hall was already filled with students each doing their own thing. Most people were eating breakfast and conversing but a few were trying to do their homework last minute and some were just randomly sat there for no reason. The whole hall was filled with the buzz of constant chatter and general happiness though. James loved the atmosphere here at Hogwarts.

The professors table was also fully occupied apart from him. Lily was sat down further along having a conversation with Professor Sinistra. Them two have really become good friends, thought James, has Lily told her about me and her? Lily's back was turned and her red waves were tied up into a high ponytail. Aurora, Professor Sinistra, caught his eye and she frowned slightly before pointing him out to Lily. Aurora tossed her long curly black hair behind her shoulders and folded her arms as though waiting for some explanation from him. Oh she definitely knew.

Lily didn't frown, or scowl like he expected her too. She smiled softly and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. He nodded at her and she went back to her conversation with Aurora, who seemed a little put down at the lack of confrontation between the pair.

James sat down and started helping himself to a big plate of bacon and eggs. Faint screeching could be heard in the distance. The cue for hundreds of owls to come racing through the windows. Just as he predicted, a minute later the hall was covered in a mass of different coloured, noisy feathery birds each carrying envelopes and parcels of all kinds. A big brown bird, Artemis, his mother's owl landed right in front of him. James's face clouded over in dread.

Artemis was carrying a smoking red envelope.

A howler.

"Oh crap," muttered James.

The whole hall seemed to be staring at him. Indeed they were. It was always hilarious when someone received a howler, unless of course you were that person, but it was extremely rare for a professor to get one. In fact it was unheard of. James quickly opened it when it started to hiss, they were always worse if you didn't.

"_JAMES POTTER!" _screamed his mother's voice, a thousand times louder than usual. He sank into his seat a little as students began to laugh and professors obtained an amused smirk on their features.

"_Your father and I raised you to be the perfect gentleman." _A few sniggers were heard at this point. _"You were taught to respect women and we always thought you'd listened to us up until now."_

"_We thought we got it through your incredibly thick skull to only have protected sex until marriage." _

The whole room erupted into laughter that echoed off the walls. James's eyes widened and his face flushed red. Didn't his mother understand that this would be a highly embarrassing situation for him to be in, in front of his students? Of course she did, thought James bitterly," she'd have wanted it this way. She probably mentioned sex on purpose.

"_But nooooo! You went and got your girlfriend pregnant!"_

Everyone gasped. This certainly was an interesting piece of gossip. Brilliant now everyone knew. He looked up to see Lily smirking at him. When she caught his eye she bit her lip and tried her hardest not to laugh. She didn't try hard enough.

"_I will not have a Potter child be born out of matrimony. You will have to propose to Gwen. It's the right thing to do for the baby James. I know what you're thinking. You're thinking it's too soon and that it complicates things. I'm your mother James, I know where your true thoughts lie and I __sympathise__ with you my darling, but you brought this on yourself. You will make an excellent father, just like your own."_

James smiled. His mother can't be that upset with him. She believed he'd be a good father, in some respects she must be proud. James's smile turned into a frown when he realized what she said about marriage. He knew he'd have to do it. He might not want to but if Gwen was going to be the mother of his child then she would have to be his wife as well. Not only did the Potter's have a reputation to uphold it was James believed was right anyways.

"_I can't believe I had to find it out from Gwen! Why didn't you tell me I was going to have a grandbaby as soon as you found out? Honestly James, you're so slack sometimes. Your father and I need to know stuff like this and it's embarrassing when other people are discussing it and we don't even have a clue what they're talking about. _

_I will see you at Easter I suppose honey. Lots of love to you, and my little unborn grandbaby."_

The letter erupted into a flames and ashes floated down onto his sausages. The great hall was filled with the noise of laughter and gossip, no doubt about him. If James could make the ground open up and swallow him whole he would have by now. Perhaps Dumbledore knew a way…

Lily and Aurora both grinned at him as he looked at them a moment after wallowing in self pity. They both found it hilarious and were milking it for all it was worth but Lily seemed to be different than Aurora. Aurora's grin was more of a smirk, a triumphant look about her, as if she thought he deserved complete humiliation. Lily's was also a smirk but her emerald green eyes gave him a look of sympathy. He gave a small grateful smile to Lily and she nodded subtly. He understood the message. It was that of an understanding. Of forgiveness.

James sunk low into his chair as his last class of the day left the room. All he had heard all day was, 'congratulations on the baby', 'your girlfriend must feel so lucky', 'you'll be a great father, professor'. The whispers behind his back were so much different though. He could put up with it though. He was used to whisperings about him, used to people acting like his best friend but being completely different behind his back. Being in the limelight as a quidditch player, you got used to it, you had to.

A sharp knock shook him from his thoughts. He looked up to see Lily leaning against his door frame with a soft smile on her face.

"What's the point of knocking if you open the door anyway?" asked James, smirking slightly. He couldn't read her emotions so he wasn't too sure how awkward it would be between them.

"Because it's polite to knock," answered Lily, sitting attentively on the edge of his desk.

"It's also polite to wait for the person to tell you to come in," replied James swiftly. Lily shrugged and aimlessly looked through some of his papers scattered over his desk.

"You're not very neat are you?" remarked Lily off handedly.

"Never have been, never will be."

"You going to propose then?" asked Lily suddenly staring him in the eye.

James was caught off guard from the sudden change of small talk to his future plans regarding his pregnant girlfriend. He swallowed and gave himself a few moments to answer the question as best he could.

"I have no idea," responded James flatly. What an intelligent answer, if he could kick himself he would.

Lily let out laugh. He had always loved the sound of her laugh. Especially, when it involved him, directly or indirectly. At school she loathed him so it was rare she laughed if he was in the same room as her. It was a light harmonious tinkling sound. It'd be too corny to say it was like music to his ears but it really was, he thought. It wasn't an annoying giggling noise that most women did to try and impress him nor was it an unladylike snort. It was pleasant. The perfect laugh.

"You're gonna have to," said Lily. "Otherwise your mother will send you howlers everyday for the rest of your life and disown you as a son."

James chuckled. True, his mother would probably do that.

"Why the sudden change of heart?"

"What do you mean by that?" It was Lily's turn to be caught off guard.

"Yesterday, you were in tears about my unexpected news," explained James seriously, never taking his eyes off hers, hazel gazing into green. "The night before that we had sex. And now, now you're telling me to marry someone else. Do you have a multiple personality disorder that you're not telling me about cause you're really confusing me."

Lily inhaled deeply, turning to look out of window, to see the glorious views off the lake that was shimmering under the sunlight.

"We were caught up in the moment that night," said Lily softly. "It wasn't meant to happen. It was a stressful night and it shouldn't have happened, we should have had more control over our actions. Yesterday I was just being stupid and emotional; perhaps I was still caught up in the moments. That and the fact I saw Ethan. Gwen being the one he screwed was just the icing on the top I suppose. I've had some time to think things through and you deserve to be happy. Deserve to have the family that will be yours in a few months. So you should marry Gwen and have your house of screaming messy black haired kids with the white picket fence."

"You're still incredibly confusing flower," chuckled James.

"And I always will be," chirped Lily, jumping of his desk. "You should floo to your apartment. I believe you've got something to arrange."

"Yeah I should do it tonight. I don't want another howler from my mother tomorrow," said James, cringing slightly, running a hand through his messy black hair. "Merlin, that was so embarrassing."

"Aurora thought you totally deserved it and a tiny fraction of me does to," smirked Lily, as she made her way over to the door.

"Whether it was deserved or not, it was still humiliating," admitted James, chuckling slightly. "Are me and you good now then?"

She looked over her shoulder to see him. Her emerald eyes swept across his features before firmly staring into his hazel orbs. "Yeah we're good James."


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

James took a deep breath before grabbing a handful of silvery floo powder and throwing it down into the orange glowing flames. They glittered emerald green and James stepped into them whilst tucking his elbows in at his side.

"Potter Place," he said loud and clearly as he braced himself for the clumsy exit he was bound to make when he fell out of his fireplace at home. He wasn't very graceful when it came to flooing.

Just as he predicted, he fell awkwardly in a heap on his red plush carpet in his living room. Whilst muttering profanities he untangled himself and looked up to see Sirius and Remus talking animatedly about the latest Quidditch match injury on his black leather couch. They stopped and looked down at him sitting on the floor covered in ash.

"Have I flooed into the wrong apartment?" asked James dazedly.

"No you haven't Prongs," said Remus, waving his wand to get rid of the ash and helping James up to his feet.

"Where's Gwen?" asked James bemused. "And what are you doing in my apartment?"

"Gwen decided she didn't want to be alone so she moved back in with her parents I think," said Sirius, off handedly. "So naturally, we moved in here because it's better than our apartments put together."

"Oh naturally," said James sarcastically as he sank into one of the black leather arm chairs.

"What aren't you pleased to see us?" asked Sirius pouting slightly. James stared at his friend and smiled softly.

"I'm sorry Pad, I'm just stressed at the moment."

"What are you even doing here James?" inquired Remus thoughtfully. "You're supposed to be at Hogwarts."

"I was looking for Gwen," answered James truthfully. "I'm sure my mother has told you what's happened."

"We haven't spoken to your parents since New Year's James," stated Remus intrigued.

"Oh."

"Well are you going to tell us what's going on or not?" pleaded Sirius, getting quite restless.

James sighed. "I don't know where to begin. My life is such a mess at the moment. I just don't know what to do."

"James we are your best friends. We're like brothers and we always will be. You know you can tell us anything," said Sirius, seriousness spreading across his boyish good looks after figuring how much James was stressed.

James grinned at his friends' reassurances and their loyalty.

"Well you know about mine and Lily's mission for the Order, don't you?" They nodded in affirmative. "The guy Lily was getting info from tried to do stuff to her so I stupefied him. She was so shaken up by it; I comforted her and sort of told her my feelings towards her. She thought I was drunk and I proved I wasn't and then we kind of went back to the hotel. I slept with Lily."

James lowered his head and bit his lip and waiting for his friend's shocked responses.

"We knew it would happen sooner or later," said Sirius casually. James's head shot up and Remus just nodded smiling. "Is that why you were trying to find Gwen? Are you dumping her for Lily?"

James hated crushing his friend's dreams. Sirius looked like a little child hopeful of divorced parents getting back together.

"You haven't heard the rest of the story yet Sirius," said James darkly. "The next morning, we just felt happy. I mean, it was amazing. I wasn't thinking about what it would mean or what the consequences of it would be. Neither was she. We were just enjoying. When I was walking down the corridor I bumped into Gwen but she wasn't alone. She was with Ethan. Lily's ex boyfriend. Then I learned that it was them too Lily saw on Halloween. Gwen cheated on me."

"What!?!" practically screamed Remus and Sirius, outraged. "And you're still with her?"

"She's pregnant, guys, pregnant," said James in a strangled painful voice. "And the baby's mine. I've got to stay with her. In fact I've got to marry her."

"She's…you're going to be…congratulations," said Sirius, now pacing the room.

James laughed bitterly.

"But you don't love Gwen do you?" said Remus, it was much more of a statement than a question. "You love Lily. Yet you're marrying Gwen. If she cheated on you, how do you know for sure the baby is yours?"

"She had a DNA test done at St.Mungos," said James flatly. "I have to marry her. You know I have to keep the good Potter name intact."

"Does Lily know?"

"Yeah," said James quietly. "She was upset and angry at first but now….now she wants me to marry Gwen. She wants the baby to be happy. She's being so strong. She's cracked a few times but we've talked things through. In fact she's the one who convinced me to marry Gwen."

"You've totally screwed up your life," said Sirius, having a shot of firewhiskey. "Want some?"

"I can't be drunk when I ask someone to marry me," sighed James.

"Just the one," said Remus. James stared at him in shock. Remus was meant to be the good boy. Man, "To sort out your nerves and stuff."

James nodded and Sirius poured out a shot for him. He downed it straightaway and grimaced as he felt it burning in the back of his throat.

"Gwen's at her parents' right?"

Sirius and Remus nodded.

"Thanks for your help and the firewhiskey," said James getting up. "Although, I'm sure, the firewhiskey is mine."

"Oh yes so it is," said Sirius innocently smiling.

"James you know who don't have to do this," said Remus sincerely, with a hand on James's shoulder. "You said Lily wants the baby to be happy but I'm sure she'd want you to be happy as well."

James swallowed forcibly. "I've got to do it Remus. You know I do."

Remus nodded grimly and went back over to Sirius.

James no longer needed to floo. He could simply apparate over there instead. He gracefully turned on the spot and with a loud crack he had disapparated. Although he had been apparating for nearly six years now he still hadn't quite gotten used to weird sensation of what felt like being squeezed through a tube.

A second later he had landed into the Barker family home. If he could call it that.It was a mansion, like his, just not as big but it didn't have the same warm cozy feel that his had. The atmosphere seemed cold. James glanced around the room to see black and white uncomfortable furniture and modern art. It had an air of elegance and sophistication. Upper class snobbery James called it.

"James!" squealed Annabelle, stepping into the room from the foyer. She was wearing a pale pink sweater with lightly flared white trousers with pink stilettos. Her bleach blonde hair fell straight down her shoulders and her make up was practically plastered to her face. "What brings you here?"

"I'm here to talk to Gwen actually," he said nervously. "It's important."

Annabelle smiled. "Oh I still can't believe you two are having a baby. It's so exciting!"

"Extremely," said James with a forced grin. This woman was really annoying. "Is she here then?"

"Yeah she's in her room you can just go straight up."

After muttering a hurried thanks he walked rapidly up to Gwen's bedroom. Without knocking he entered the princess like bedroom. The walls were baby pink… in fact…everything was! The queen-size four poster bed, the frilly cushions, the teddy bears, the carpet, the wardrobe, the vanity, everything! It was quite sickening James decided.

Gwen was lying on her bed flicking through a magazine, of which she was on the front cover. She looked up at him as he made an entrance in her room. She smiled anxiously at him as he sat down on the edge of her bed.

"How you feeling? With the pregnancy and everything," asked James awkwardly.

"Its fine but I can't model anymore because my figure has just gone horribly wrong," replied Gwen with what was James detected a hint of bitterness but she covered it up with a sweet smile. "Morning sickness actually lasts all day which is awful. I feel like I'm dying."

Gwen always did over exaggerate things, thought James amused, if this is what she's like with the morning sickness she's not gonna like the actual birth.

"But the baby is fine?"

"Oh yeah she's fine," said Gwen curtly.

"The baby's a girl?" asked James, a genuine smile spreading fast across his face. She nodded and James smiled even wider. He was having a baby girl!

"When I had the DNA testing done they confirmed it was a girl when they confirmed it was your baby," said Gwen cautiously. "You never said what you were doing here anyways James. If it was just to ask how I was then you could have owled or asked over the fireplace unless it was something so important you had to leave the school."

"It is actually," said James seriously. "I've given this a lot of thought. Many different people have given me advice on it but this is my decision. I want the best for is going to be our family."

"What is it James?" asked Gwen impatiently.

He got up off the bed and kneeled down on one knee. Gwen gasped.

"Gwen, will you marry me?" He pulled out a black velvety box that he opened to reveal a large princess cut diamond with two smaller bright emeralds at either side on a white gold ring. It was a beautiful ring meant for a beautiful person… It had been his grandmother's engagement ring originally and when she had passed on it had been given to him in her will.

"Of course I will," shrieked Gwen, throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him repeatedly. "I love you so much. You, me and this baby is going to be all that matters from now on."

James smiled weakly at her. "I love you too."

As Gwen busied herself with trying on the ring and admiring the beauty of it James took the moment to digest what he had just done and the effects it would have on his life from now on. He almost didn't hear Gwen speaking.

"James? James? Are you listening?"

"What? Sorry."

"I was saying we should have the wedding as soon as we can," gushed Gwen. "After all I won't be able to fit into any nice dresses in a while. How about before Easter?"

"What!?!" exclaimed James, almost choking. "Easter's in two months and you want to be married before then? I'm still teaching, I don't have time to plan a wedding. Can we not wait until I've finished? So we can have a summer wedding? Like August?"

"The baby might be born by then!"

"Yeah well then she can enjoy the day with her parents cant she?"

"But why can't we have the wedding before the baby? Don't you trust me that it's yours?" shouted Gwen.

"Of course I do, Gwen," sighed James taking her hands in his. "Do you really want to spend the first few months of marriage apart?"

Gwen pouted cutely. "I suppose I don't want to be away from you but I don't want to be away from you now. Cant you just quit?"

"Gwen you know I can't do that," Said James gravely. "I can't just abandon my students and I'll just be letting down Dumbledore if I do that. Besides, I like my job."

"I know I know, you can't blame a girl for trying," said Gwen with a sad smile on her face. "I'll see you at Easter then. It's your birthday as well. Can we at least have a baby shower then? We'll just have a big party for are friends where we get lots of present for our baby."

"Yeah of course," smiled James, giving her a quick kiss on the lips. "I'm looking forward to it. I've got to go back to Hogwarts now though. I've got lesson in the morning."

"Bye James," said Gwen giving him a big hug. "There's floo powder in the fuchsia pot on the mantelpiece."

"Thanks," said James. "Bye."

He grabbed a hand full of the silvery powder and threw it into the fire before stepping into the now emerald green flames.

"Hogwarts!" he said loud and clear. A second later as he was whizzing through fireplaces he heard a distant squeal of "Mum I'm getting married!"

He landed with a thud inside McGonagall's old fireplace. He waved his wand and all the dirty black ash had vanished leaving his clothes and hair spotless. He ran hand through the messy raven black spikes before walking off to his living quarters. He went trough his office straight to his bedroom door as he muttered his password the door swung open to reveal Lily laying seductively on his bed wearing only a really short, low cut silky black nightdress. She was wearing dark eye shadow and eyeliner giving her eyes a smoky sultry look. Her fiery red hair cascaded down her back in waves. As she noticed him enter the room, she stood up and walked over to him steadily, keeping eye contact throughout. Her eyes were dark with desire and his breath hitched in his throat as he realized if she came any closer he might just lose control.

"I don't care about Gwen," she said alluringly. "I don't care about the baby. I don't care about the fact you're getting married. I don't give a damn about the consequences," she was right in front of him now, her small hands playing with his tie entrancingly, "All I care about is _you_."


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen

James had really started to hate the sun or, in fact, just daylight in general. It always seemed to stream though his window pouring floods of light into the room deliberately purely to wake him up. He didn't hate the sun. The sun hated him. Perhaps it was his fault though. He did have some really nice curtains that worked beautifully at blocking the light. He just always forgot to close them on a night. Well, last night he was a bit preoccupied to be thinking about curtains.

He lowered his head to look down at his lean and muscular chest to stare at Lily whose naked body was draped over his own. His arms wrapped around her waist loosely and hers placed delicately on his chest next to her own sleeping head. Her face was cloaked by her tangle of red fiery waves. She was lying on her stomach and James didn't know how she could do that because he always found that sleeping position rather uncomfortable but she seemed to have no problem with it. She was beautiful, he had always though that, and he always would. He tucked her hair behind her ear to get a slight view of her porcelain slumbering face.

He sighed as he helplessly watched the hair fall back into her face. He still wasn't sure how last night happened. All he knew was that it did and it was amazing. He knew that it was kind of morally wrong and all but what red-blooded male wouldn't have practically pounced on the woman they loved whom at the time was wearing incredibly little incredibly sexily? Ok so he didn't exactly pounce but he certainly didn't reject her. He had remarkably fond memories of grabbing her thighs, as she jumped up around his middle, and kissing her senseless as she ran through his wild raven hair. Fond memories indeed. Then the ones involving taking off her pretty little lingerie were particularly delightful and many more that he would think about but he really didn't want to take a cold shower this morning.

Unfortunately for him though Lily was laying slightly on his left arm and it was starting to go numb. He'd either have to move her or his arm to stop it from cramping but he didn't want to wake her up as she looked so peaceful yet doing either inevitably would.

James slowly pulled his arm from underneath her and when she still slept calmly he let out the breath he didn't even realize he was holding. He shook his arm gently wanting to start blood flow in it again and regain feeling. He stopped to a halt as he heard Lily mumble incoherently. A minute later, as he subconsciously stopped moving in hope she wouldn't wake, the tangle mess of red lifted up from his chest to reveal the sleepy, yet attractive none the less, face of Lily. Whilst still lying on top of James she shifted herself around slightly so her weight was on her elbows and she could lift herself off of James a bit.

Her emerald green eyes were screwed up as she let them adjust to the light. Her make up that was done to perfection was now merely a couple of smudges on her face and her hair were a mess but the shy grin she wore made her whole face light up. She even looked amazing when she'd only just woke up. She did to him anyways.

"So…"

"So," he grinned back.

She started laughing. The light tinkling sound was always pleasant to his ears.

"We need to talk don't we?" said James as casually as he could.

Lily stopped laughing and stared fully into his breathtaking hazel eyes. "Yeah we do," she said softly.

"What was last night, Lily?" asked James running a hand through his already messy hair. "I mean, you knew I proposed to my pregnant girlfriend and yet you literally jumped me." He smirked as pink tainted her creamy cheeks. "Not that I'm complaining."

"You're not happy proposing to your pregnant girlfriend," she answered quietly as though not quite sure if she was stating facts or not. "And neither am I."

"I know you're not," he said gently, lightly stroking her face with his thumb. "You're right about me as well. I'm not happy with the fact I've got to marry her but the truth is that I have got to marry her. She is carrying my child after all. By the way the wedding is going to be August though you probably won't want to come of course."

"You deserve to be happy!" exclaimed Lily, as she wrapped the bed sheet around her body and sat up in a cross legged position. James sat up in the same position leaning against the headboard as he placed a pillow over his lower torso sheepishly. "At least until you have to marry her."

"And how do you suggest I keep happy?" asked James grinning.

"Be with me," said Lily earnestly and vulnerably. "Secretly, until August. James we had sex last night and I don't want it to be a one time thing, I can't handle that and to be honest I don't think you could either."

"Yeah it sounds lovely it really does Lily," said James seriously, "but you said you couldn't handle it if this was a one time thing. How are you going to handle it when I have to get married?"

"James you'll have finished working at Hogwarts by then and to be honest I think I might as well. It'd be different without you. I'll go back and be a healer again. Think about it, after this year we probably won't see each other again which means I won't have to see your face everyday and live with the heart ache in knowing what we could have had."

"You have a good point I guess," said James. "Just to let you know, I don't think I'd have been able to cope looking at you this year if we kept this a one time thing."

"Does that mean that me and you….are gonna…you know?"

"Lily I meant what I said the other day when I said that I was falling in love with you too."

Lily's face broke out into a huge grin and she literally leaped on him as she leant forward to press her lips hard against his. He responded fervently by slipping his tongue expertly into her mouth and letting his get lost in her tousled fiery waves. He skillfully rolled them over so he was on top as her hands glided over his well defined chest. They broke apart when in the need of air and James felt extremely giddy as he rested his weight on his elbows so he didn't crush her.

"You do know this is wrong on so many levels don't you?"

"I know James but it's worth it."

"Not only is it morally wrong and all that," said James with smirk. "But you do realize this is strictly forbidden at Hogwarts."

"It is?" asked Lily, tilting her head to one side.

"For someone who reads everything and always follows the rules you're not being your usual self," laughed James.

"Love makes you do stupid things," said Lily smiling softly. "But seriously, there's actually a rule written down that professors here are not allowed to be intimate with each other?"

"Yeah there is. I think it's written down in a booklet of all the rules of Hogwarts that Dumbledore gave me when I took the job."

"I didn't get one of those!"

"Probably because good old Dumbledore figured you knew everything already."

Lily laughed. "I'm not that much of a good girl you know. Did it say what the consequences were of being caught?"

"If you're caught in front of students you get fired," said James, biting his lip as he tried to remember. "But if the students don't have a clue about it then I think you just get reprimanded for it and are made to split up."

"Let's hope they don't catch us then," said Lily glumly.

James kissed her softly before grinning. "I'm a marauder, Flower. If there's one thing a marauder is good at then it's not getting caught."

"I always knew you marauders were good for something," said Lily smiling again.

"As much as I would love to have a repeat performance of last night we've got classes in an hour and I'm sure you want to shower and have breakfast and stuff."

"Awww you're being so sweet," said Lily giving him a chaste kiss on the lips. "Surrendering morning sex so I can have breakfast? Oh you're just too kind."

"I hope you're not mocking me," said James tickling her tummy lightly.

"Of course not Professor Potter," smirked Lily.

"You are a very bad girl and I would love to punish you but my stomach is rumbling. I need food!"

"Nice to know you put food before me, very nice," said Lily pretending to be hurt. James got up off of her and stood up. She held her hands out and he grabbed them pulling her up into a kiss.

"Food comes second," smirked James. "Although…it's a very close second." She smacked the back of his head softly before wrapping her arms around his neck.

"You do realize we're both completely naked don't you," said Lily suggestively.

"Oh I realize more than you think," said James, his voice strained. Her emerald eyes flickered downwards before smirking evilly.

"I think I'll take your invisibility cloak and go back to my room to take a nice hot steamy shower," she proclaimed wickedly before leaning upwards to kiss him passionately and press herself against him. "Enjoy your cold one." She gave him naughty wink before covering herself completely with the invisibility cloak and left his room leaving him with his mouth wide open in shock.

He glanced downwards and muttered profanities as he walked into his bathroom and turned on the shower at a _very _low temperature.

"I hate cold showers," muttered James darkly as he stepped in and grimaced.

Twenty minutes later he entered the Great Hall to see Lily sat smiling sweetly up at him. Her shiny red hair was no longer a tangled mess but it fell down her back flawlessly straight. Her make up had been perfected once again. Today she had opted for wizarding wear and she looked stunning in her silky aqua witch robes.

He walked up to the table as if to sit down but inconspicuously placed his hands on her shoulders and leaned towards her ear and tucked her hair behind it.

"You are pure evil," he whispered.

She twisted her head slightly towards him. "I know."

"I really do think you need punishing," he smirked.

"I'll be doing the punishing tonight."

"Even better."

"Not you, you idiot," said Lily laughing quietly. "I'm supervising detention. You'll have to have fun on your own."

James sighed. "I've always hated detention but never have I hated it this much."

He slipped into the seat next to her and twiddled a sausage about with his fork as he watched Lily start a conversation up with Aurora who was sat next to her. James had a feeling they were talking about him, especially when they both turned to look at him and burst out into giggles.

After breakfast James grabbed Lily's arm and pulled her into an empty unused classroom.

"Have you told Aurora?" he asked urgently.

"Of course I haven't told Rory," hissed Lily before softening her expression. "Do you really think I'm going to start telling everyone that I'm having an affair with a nearly married man?"

"Lils, don't say put it like that," urged James gently, taking her hands in his and pressing his lips to her fingertips. "That makes it sound so wrong and we both know it isn't."

"Sorry I didn't mean it like that," smiled Lily. "I've got to go I've got to teach a class of hyper first years."

"I'll trade you any day," grinned James. "I've got to put up with all the moody seventh years."

"You love those moody seventh years," smirked Lily. "Because they all love you."

"I know who I love the most though," whispered James as he leant into capture her lips in a sweet kiss. "Right I'll see you later, my beloved moody seventh years await me."

He strode into the full classroom with a grin on his face. It was noisy and chaotic as they thought he wouldn't turn up despite the fact that he was only ten minutes late. People were sat on the desks, some were showing off using magic and most were just having a chat.

"Quiet down! Go sit in your proper places please," called out James. "Sorry I'm late I had to discuss an important matter with another professor."

"Congratulations on your engagement sir," purred Courtney Summer, flipping her long blonde hair behind her shoulders.

"How do you know about that?" he asked bemusedly.

"It's in this week's Witch Weekly."

"Have you got the magazine on you?"

"Of course," she smiled flirtatiously as she pulled it out of her bright pink handbag. "There you go."

"Thanks I'll give you it back by the end of the lesson."

He flicked through the magazine until he found he article in question. His eyes widened as he saw it. On one page there was a picture of him and Gwen that was taken sometime last year at a party. He watched his picture self grin and lean in and kiss picture Gwen. He looked at the other page and read it as he sat down on top of his desk.

_Our Fave Celeb Couple Set To Marry_

_Yesterday our sources discovered that a certain ex quidditch super hottie James Potter proposed to supermodel cover girl Gwen barker. Potter, who is currently the Transfiguration Professor at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, is now completely unavailable! So sorry to all the girls out there that are crying their little hearts out no doubt. _

_Potter has one the title of number one in Witch Weekly's Twenty Five Sexiest Teen Wizards Under Twenty Five every year since he graduated school as well as other prestigious titles such as, Wealthiest Wizard under Twenty Five, Hottest Quidditch Player and six times winner of Witch Weekly's Most-Charming-Smile Award. He definitely is well loved in the wizarding community._

_His new fiancée Gwen is no different. She's got perfect blonde hair and gorgeous baby blue eyes. She's Witch Weekly's favourite cover girl and probably every other magazine's as well. But the modeling days are over for Gwen at least for a while._

_She's pregnant!_

_Our hazel eyed raven haired cutie is going to be a daddy! The baby and the wedding are both due sometime in the summer. I'm guessing it will be a pink themed wedding because they're having a baby girl. If I was James Potter's daughter I would definitely be a daddy's girl. I'm sure she'll be doted upon like a little princess all her life and perhaps, like her daddy, in twenty years she'll be the one making the headlines. _

_Congratulations James and Gwen!_

_By Freya Charmer _

"Stupid girly magazines should all rot in hell and all that read them," muttered James as he threw the magazine onto the desk.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty

A dark brown owl pecked and nipped at James's flesh that wasn't covered by his bed sheet. He moaned and flapped his hand at the bird in vain of scaring it away. The bird got more and impatient and pecked his ear lobe incredibly hard. James squeaked with pain and sat up and glared at the bird. Everything seemed intent on not letting him ever have a lie in. It was the weekend for Merlin's sake!

He rubbed his eyes and took the letter from the somewhat smug owl. He, rather immaturely, did some vulgar hand gestures at the bird as it flew back out of the window presumably to the Owlery to get some rest. He unraveled the rolled up parchment and instantly recognized the loopy cursive as Dumbledore's.

_James,_

_I __apologise__ profusely if my owl has woken you up but I needed to inform you of today's staff meeting at eight before breakfast. Please be prompt at arriving at the staffroom._

_Yours truly,_

_Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore _

James chuckled at the randomness of Brian, it always made him laugh. He glanced at his clock on the bedside table and he was alarmed to see it was twenty to eight. He shot out of bed and headed for the shower. By the time he had showered and dressed himself it was five minutes to eight. He hurried out of his room and down the ever changing stairways. Luckily for him the staffroom was merely a floor below him and he got to there at exactly eight o'clock.

"Glad you're here on time," said Dumbledore his cerulean eyes twinkling.

"Aren't I always?" grinned James, noticing all the other professors were already seated. Dumbledore smiled fondly at him and motioned James to sit down and join the others.

James rarely went to the staffroom, he usually spent his spare time in his office, classroom or bedroom or Lily's. The staffroom contained an assortment of different kind of chairs, a dusty looking wardrobe and a long, dark, wooden coffee table in the middle. He sat down on a quite uncomfortable rickety chair that James was worried wouldn't hold his weight. He caught Lily's eye and glared softly at her as she bit her lip trying not to laugh at him while she was sat on a squishy brown armchair free from discomfort.

"I know you're probably all confused to why I called you all here for a meeting," started Dumbledore, stood up facing the half nodding professors. "But it's about a matter the Governing Board of Hogwarts would like to address. They want to interview all the teachers personally and then they would like teachers to review another teacher whilst teaching. I want you to not worry as none of your jobs are on the line; decisions of that sort are up to me. That doesn't mean it isn't to be taken seriously. I expect all of you to answer any questions asked truthfully and that you act in an appropriate and respectful manner.

Whilst conducting a review on a fellow member of staff I hope that none of take personal thoughts into account. This is about their teaching conduct after all. The list of interview times is posted up on the wall behind you and you will be given the name of the professor you are reviewing by the Board at this time. The interviews themselves are to be taken place in the unused classroom eleven. I believe that's all and have a pleasant Saturday."

He exited the room and the professors started talking about the sudden news. They weren't impressed. James made his way up to the list on the notice board and stared at it until he found his subject.

_Ancient Runes – Bathsheba Babbling – 10:00_

_Arithmancy – Septima Vector – 10:15_

_Astronomy – Aurora Sinistra – 10:30_

_Care of Magical Creatures – Artemis Kettleburn – 10:45_

_Charms – Lily Evans – 11:00_

_Defense Against the Dark Arts – Marcus Warrick – 11:15_

_Divination – Melinda Castling – 11:30_

_Flying – Rolanda Hooch – 11:45_

_Herbology – Pomona Sprout – 12:00_

_History of Magic – Cuthbert Binns – 12:15_

_Muggle Studies – Charity Burbage – 12:30_

_Potions – Horace Slughorn – 12:45_

_Transfiguration – James Potter – 13:00_

For some reason, the Board's sudden need to interview the professors unnerved James. He didn't like it one bit. He felt Lily's presence next to him and glanced down at her. She too was reading the list with a scowl graced upon her pretty facial features.

"I take it you don't like the idea of these interviews either then."

"No, I do not," hissed Lily, enraged. "There's absolutely no point in interviewing us as they've got no power in firing or hiring us. In conclusion that means they're up to something and I want to know what."

"What could they possibly be up to?" asked James cynically. "After all, like you said they can't do anything. The worst they can do, if they want one of us fired, is to advise Dumbledore in doing so and Dumbledore isn't going to be sacking anyone. It isn't Dumbledore's style or nature for that matter. He sees the best in people and I for one trust his reasons for hiring people and so should the Board."

"But you do agree that these interviews are bad though?"

"Of course I do," said James, running a hand through his messy hair. "I know when something's suspicious and this is definitely suspicious. I don't like it one bit, but do I actually think they can anything about it if they don't like me? Nope. Besides I'm too high up in the Wizarding World for them to even try and fire me."

"Yeah but I'm not," said Lily worriedly.

"Lily you're a great professor you've got nothing to fear at all," said James softly. "The kids love you, the rest of the staff loves you, Dumbledore loves you and the Board will do as well."

She smiled meekly and sighed. "I've got to track down Courtney Summers now."

"Why?"

"Because I was meant to be tutoring her that hour before lunch," explained Lily. "But now I'm going to have to arrange it so it's the hour after lunch otherwise she's going to fail her Charms NEWT."

"I've got her in my class," smirked James.

"I know."

"How?"

"Because it's "Professor Potter this" and Professor Potter that" no wonder she's failing," said Lily bitterly. "Her and her little friends are all hopelessly, and quite pathetically might I add, in love with you."

"Awww is Little Lily jealous?"

She gave him one of her dirty looks. And her dirty looks were quite dirty.

"Or maybe not," said James smiling innocently. Lily rolled her eyes before giving into the smile that would have found its way onto her face one way or another. "If it's any help Courtney's probably having breakfast now and if you don't find her you could always leave a note on your office door."

"Yeah," said Lily as they made their way into the Great Hall. "I'll tell you all about my interview so you know what to expect on yours."

"You can't," said James, pouting slightly.

"Why not?"

"I've got my own tutoring to be done with a fifth year who is desperately struggling this year," admitted James. "You think you're bad at Transfiguration wait until you see this kid. He does try his hardest it's just not one of his natural abilities. I've heard he's a rather good potion maker though."

"I'll see you at lunch."

"I'm tutoring through lunch," said James glumly. "I promised this kid I'd help him and I will so I'm spending two hours purely concentrating on him. He is going to pass Transfiguration if it kills me."

"This interview isn't going to be a problem for you at all," smiled Lily.

"And why is that?" asked James, cocking his head to side.

"Because you care about your students," said Lily gently. "Oh Courtney's arrived I'll go tell her about the change of plans."

As Lily left him he found himself smiling. He had once doubted his teaching but to hear someone complimenting him on it, especially Lily who was a born teacher, made him genuinely happy.

Hours later he found himself running a hand through his hair and sighing every so often. The boy he was tutoring, Chris, really was trying his hardest, he just wasn't the smartest. He definitely wasn't advising him to take Transfiguration at NEWT level put it that way. He had been recapping old things as well as topics they'd covered recently. Now they were going over Animagi as they tended to be in the OWL paper although they were taught the year previous.

"Ok Chris I'm going to ask you a question that has been on past OWL papers," said James and Chris nodded. "What is the difference between Animagi and ordinary transfiguration of humans into animals?

Chris screwed up his bushy brown eyebrows in thought for a few seconds before answering.

"If a human is just transfigured into an animal it has an animal brain," answered Chris slowly as though afraid of saying the wrong thing. "So when transfigured back the human can't remember what they've done as an animal but an Animagi has a human brain with human thoughts and can remember things."

"Twenty points to Hufflepuff," grinned James clapping his hands together. "You write what you just said in an OWL paper if you get that question and that's an Exceeds Expectations right there."

Chris smiled himself and James felt proud of helping this student. If someone had told him in his own fifth year at Hogwarts he'd have been teaching and tutoring he'd have laughed in their face. But now it spread a warm feeling in his body.

"I think that'll be it for today then Chris," proclaimed James as he stood up from behind his desk. "We'll arrange another session depending on how well you do on your essay on the _Inanimatus Conjurus _spell. I'll see you on Monday for class then."

Chris bade him a good weekend before leaving the room with his books and scrolls of notes. James did a quick tidy of his office as his own notes and books had ended up scrawled across the room.

James once again found himself walking down the ever changing staircases (which luckily for him hadn't changed) and to the unused classroom. He walked past Slughorn who had just finished his own interview and briefly muttered hello to him. He knocked politely on the door and waited for a response.

"Come in!" The female voice sounded strict and unwelcoming. He nervously ran a hand though his hair for what seemed the millionth time that day before entering the room.

A woman, who James guessed was in her early fifties, was sat at a desk with one lone black chair in front. She had chestnut brown hair that was streaked with grey pulled back into a McGonagall type bun. She was wearing navy witch robes that were unflattering and made her look bulky even though she was currently sat down. James shook her hand as he sat down on the chair in front of her.

"Hi I'm-"

"-James Potter. Yes I'm quite well aware who I'm interviewing thank you very much," She said sternly. He had already decided he didn't like her one bit. "I'm Lysandra Connells, the Head of the Board of Governors of Hogwarts. I'll be interviewing you today. Any questions before we begin?"

"Just the one," said James seriously. "Why is the Board doing these interviews and reviews? You have no power over who works at Hogwarts so what's the point?"

"The only other professors who have asked that are Professor Dumbledore himself and the Charms professor." He chuckled inwardly as he conjured up mental images of Lily striking up an argument with this woman. "It is merely a check on how efficient the professors of Hogwarts are."

"You've never done before so why start now?" asked James guardedly.

"We've got a new policy to be more involved in the going-ons of Hogwarts," replied Connells primly. "After all the teaching of a young witch or wizard's mind is the most important of all, wouldn't you agree Mr Potter?"

"Of course," muttered James.

"Well then let the interview begin," She said moving the conversation along swiftly. "How long have you been teaching here at Hogwarts?"

"This is my first year as you probably already know," answered James dryly.

"Naturally. Have you had any complaints from the students about your teaching ethics?"

"No, the students I teach seem happy with their classes and each one of them should be doing well in their exams if they try."

"Very good that answers my next question as well. What brought you to teaching at Hogwarts?"

"Many reasons," responded James. "Minerva McGonagall wanted a break this year and recommended me for the job as she says I have a natural flair for Transfiguration. I myself wanted a break from my usual job. I wanted to get away from the all the fame and attention and well, Hogwarts is my home as it is for a lot of people I imagine."

"Very well then," carried on Connells. "Does your fame bring you unwanted attention or hassle from the students?"

"Not particularly. They were curious at first but that's only natural. They've never questioned my authority or teaching skills because of my fame and they see me as a professor not a quidditch star now."

"I believe you have quite a history with one of your colleagues, Professor Evans I believe?"

"Everyone's got a history," said James darkly.

"But does everyone keep their histories in their pasts?"

"Well all that depends on whether they want to or not, doesn't it," said James unperturbedly.

"Do you?"

"That's neither here nor there, Madam Connells."

"But, you see Mr Potter, it is," she replied. "It's my job to know whether two of this school's professors are romantically involved."

"You look like a woman who likes to be informed of things," remarked James coolly. "So I presume you read the Prophet and magazines such as Witch Weekly."

"Yes and that's to do with this conversation because?"

"Because if you are an informed woman who reads the newspapers and magazines then you should know that I'm currently engaged to my long time girlfriend who is expecting my first born baby," explained James vehemently. "Therefore have no reason to bring my past into my present."

"Why yes of course Mr Potter, I apologise for insinuating such things," stuttered Connells whilst filing through papers to hide her embarrassment. "You'll be reviewing Professor Slughorn on Monday, the second to last class. That's all you may enjoy the rest of your weekend now."

He left the room and smirked to himself as he walked back up to his room. Perhaps he didn't like his status or fame but if he could use it when he could he definitely would.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty One

James found himself on the Fourth floor wandering down the corridor towards the Library. After his interview he had gone back to his office to finish marking some of his sixth year's essays when he stumbled across something in an essay that he didn't know himself whether it was fact or not. Therefore he was going to try locating the mysterious fact in one of the Library's many books on the subject.

After seven years here of being a student here and another couple of months of being a professor he had rarely entered the library. Even before the OWL's and NEWT's when Remus had forced them to study Remus had brought the necessary books up to the dormitory. As a student he had actually only entered the Library to find Lily, something that Lily herself did not particularly like. Now that he was a professor he had kept his own books that had proven efficient up until now. In fact, he wasn't even sure where the Transfiguration section was.

He walked up to the main desk in the middle where Madam Pince, the vulture-like librarian, was keeping a suspicious eye (or two) on the students who had their hands on her precious books.

"Excuse me, Madam Pince, could you point out where the Transfiguration section is please?" he asked politely.

She stared at him apprehensively before answering. "Is James Potter actually going to use the Library as a place of studying or are you here to pester the non loud people or are you here to, perhaps, enchant my books to fly around hitting people again?"

James winced slightly. He had forgotten about that little incident. In his sixth year Sirius and he had enchanted several books to fly around and hit Snape around the head.

"I am terribly sorry about that Madam Pince," he said honestly. "I was a very immature boy but now I actually am here to use the books in the appropriate way."

"Very well then," she said, relenting warily. "The transfiguration section is the fifth section to the left."

He muttered a hurried thank you before going to where she had said.

"First section…second section…third section…fourth section…fifth section! Aha!"

He traced his index finger along the spines of the books as he walked along in front of the shelves. He muttered the names of the different books underneath his breath and promptly slipped the correct book out when he had found the right one. He leaned against the bookcase he flicked through the musty smelling book when he heard an irate female voice coming from the sixth section. He removed enough books off of the bookcase shared between the two sections so he could see through.

Lily and Courtney were sat at one of the desks with several book open strewn across it. Lily looked at her wits end, her hands rubbing her temples with her eyes closed and James could tell she was trying her hardest to not let her redheaded temper off.

"I don't even see the point of learning Charms," stated Courtney, arms crossed looking defiant with her blonde flowing around her shoulders and her baby blue eyes glaring in rebelliously. She definitely was the Gwen of the future. "When exactly am I going to need to use an _Unbreakable Charm_?"

"Well maybe in the future you might want to make something unbreakable," seethed Lily.

"Oh my God!" exclaimed Courtney in that irritating high pitched voice that she just had to use just to emphasise the point of _oh my God_ even more. "Could I use it on my nails so they'd never break and I could have the perfect nails forever ever and ever?"

Lily stared dumbfounded at the girl and seemed to have the lost the ability to speak. James thought he should go help her out as he was really starting to feel sorry for Lily. Courtney was…annoying to put it lightly. He walked around the bookcase to find Lily look relieved at the sight of him and Courtney smiling flirtatiously.

"If you're nails were unbreakable, Courtney, they'd never break," explained James grinning. "So they'd grow and grow and grow and you'd never be able to cut them or file them or what ever you girls do to your nails."

Courtney grimaced and Lily subtly mouthed 'thank you' and smiled.

"Well I think that's our hour up Courtney," Lily proclaimed happily. "I think I'll arrange it so that Aleesha Fleesham from Ravenclaw will tutor you from now on as she's top student in Charms and I think you'll benefit from her help. I shall see you on Monday in class."

Courtney nodded and packed her things up. As she left James sat himself down in her vacated seat.

"Poor Aleesha," noted James, smirking. "Dumping annoying students on her aren't you evil."

"Courtney's stressing me out on purpose," said Lily grumpily. "Besides it was that Madam Connells that put me in a bad mood to start off with."

"You too, huh."

"Why what did she ask you?"

"She mentioned some stuff about our 'past' and asked whether it was actually my past."

"Same here," said Lily sighing. "I felt bad because Dumbledore said to answer things truthfully and here I was lying through my teeth."

"Hey don't feel bad," said James softly. "You've done nothing wrong. It would be worse for the school if they fired you because you're such a great teacher."

Lily smiled gently up at him. "Thanks. You really are the sweetest person I know."

James reddened slightly. "I'm not so sure about that but thanks I suppose."

Lily laughed. "What brings you to the Library anyways? I wasn't sure you knew it existed."

"Hahaha," said James sarcastically but smiling all the same. "You think you're a funny girl don't you? I came across something in a student's essay that I didn't recognise. Turns out the student was just making up a load of things to make him look clever."

"Ooh guess who I have to review!" said Lily, her emerald eyes sparkling again. James looked puzzled for a moment and shrugged his shoulders. "You!"

James chuckled. "You better give me a good review then. I've got Slughorn. I've got no idea what to write though."

"Dumbledore's handing out a sheet at breakfast on Monday," explained Lily. "I suppose it's a bit like a questionnaire."

"You always have an answer for everything don't you," smirked James.

The weekend went by to fast for James's liking and once again he was sat at the head table in the Great Hall for breakfast holding on to the few precious moments he had before had to teach a noisy bunch of kids. The next time he saw McGonagall he was going to buy her the biggest bunch of flowers he could find to make up for all the times he must have drove her crazy as a student.

"Here you go," said Professor Sprout cheerfully, passing him a plain white envelope. "It's your question sheet for the teacher reviews."

"Thanks," said James as he tore open the envelope. Inside was two pieces of parchment. One, of which he briefly glanced at, contained the actual questionnaire and the other seemed to be instructions.

_The Board of Governors of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry would like to thank you for the time it has taken to review a fellow member of staff. We hope you will follow the instructions and answer truthfully to ensure the best review you can give to one of your peers._

_Fill in the correct name of the professor you are reviewing. Please make sure it is their full name and that you've reviewing the correct professor._

_Please use black ink only._

_Answer all questions as truthfully and don't let feelings towards people get in the way of honesty. _

_Do not sure the person you're reviewing what you've written about them._

_Give all forms back to Professor Dumbledore by the Wednesday of this week._

_Signed_

_Madam Lysandra Connells_

_Head Governor on the Board of Governors of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry_

He put the pieces of parchment back into the envelope and stuffed it into his back pocket. After all he wouldn't be needed it until later today.

"I'm going to have so much fun last period," sang Lily lightly. James turned around to face her with a bemused expression on his face.

"Why?"

"Because that's when I'm reviewing you," said Lily in the same sing-song voice as before.

"Yes but if you've read the instructions correctly then it means you have to answer all questions truthfully," smirked James. "Which means that you have to write how amazing and sexy I am."

"I can't write that though if they want me to tell the truth," said Lily smiling innocently.

James was struck puzzled for a moment as he worked out what she'd said before scowling at her as she giggled at his dumbfounded face.

"I've got to go anyway," said Lily, still laughing at him. "Professor Sprout is reviewing me first lesson and I want to be organised."

"You're always organised."

This was his first trip down to the Dungeons since he was a seventh year. He had always detested potions for several reasons. One of them being the location, it was cold and draughty, but the main reason was that it was something Snape was better at than him. And he hated Snape more than anything else in this world, well apart from Voldemort but James was pretty sure Snape was already one of the Death Eaters.

When James arrived the students were currently getting their equipment ready. Slughorn was at the front of the class looking nervous especially when James walked up towards him.

"You've got nothing to be worried about, Professor Slughorn," said James charmingly. "Just do what you usually do. These reviews are stupid. Everybody knows the professors of Hogwarts know what they're doing."

"Thanks," said Slughorn in his usual booming voice. "There's a seat at the back for you. I'll start the lesson now."

The class, James had determined were sixth years as they were starting to make _Everlasting Elixirs_ of which James had clearly remembered making as it was one of the few occasions he was partnered up with Lily. He remembered how brilliant she was at potions. She was a natural. To be honest, she was at most things. The only thing she struggled at were the compulsory flying lessons in First year and Transfiguration. Well She was dreadful at flying but she did manage to scrape an Exceeds Expectations on her Transfiguration NEWT as opposed to all her other Outstandings.

The class was soon over and James had completed all of the form.

**Professor James H D Potter of Transfiguration is reviewing: **_Professor Horace E F Slughorn of Potions._

**Does the Professor seem confident in their teaching? **_Yeah because he's been doing it for years, he knows what he's doing._

**Do they use appropriate rewards and punishments? **_Yeah he rewarded points to the people who answered the questions right and gave out a detention to someone who deliberately didn't do their homework._

**Do the students concentrate in their class? **_Most do but of course there's always the odd person who never concentrates._

**Do many students participate? **_A lot put their hands up to answer questions, they seem confident._

**Does the Professor include as many people as possible? **_He asks those who have their hands up, if they haven't he doesn't ask them._

**Does the Professor have favourites? **_Clearly. He has an eye for picking out students who are destined to do well in the future. He likes students who are intelligent or well connected. Despite of this he doesn't treat the people who aren't poorly though._

**Are there any dangers in the class that the Professor has overlooked? **_The only possible dangers are that the students add a wrong ingredient and it reacts in a dangerous way but that would only happen if the students even weren't listening or they did it to cause trouble. _

**Have you got anything else to add? **_I think Professor Slughorn is an excellent teacher who is an expert in potion making and adds a bit of fun to the lessons._

After saying a brief goodbye to Slughorn, he raced up the stairs so he wouldn't be late to his own lesson that coincidentally was also being reviewed by none other than Lily.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty Two

The students were just sitting down and getting out their wands and books as he entered. Lily was sat at the back of the room and smirking as she gestured to the clock. He rolled his eyes and got the right lesson plan out from his desk draw and placed it on top.

"Right I hope you all completed your homework on the _Inanimatus Conjurus _spell," said James confidently. "Before I collect them in and find out is there anyone who hasn't actually done it?"

A boy with dark brown spiky hair, who James knew as Jamie Neilson, raised his hand nervously.

"I was in the hospital wing the lesson you gave us the task."

"Of course," acknowledged James. "Will you please do the essay for next lesson, you know what it's about and what to include?"

Jamie nodded and James carried on with his class.

"Last lesson you all successfully managed to use the _vanishing_ spell on snails and various other invertebrates," said James proudly. "This lesson I would like you all to start practicing on vertebrates. We'll start off small with mice but although the spell and wand work are exactly the same it requires more magic and more concentration. The mice are in a cage at the back of the room if you have any problems see me immediately."

As the students all crowded round the back of the room to get a mouse, some rather reluctantly, James flicked his wand and around forty scrolls of parchment zoomed towards the desk and stacked themselves up neatly. He sat down at his desk and began marking them whilst keeping a watchful eye on his students.

"Joan you need to swish your wand not flick it," remarked James to a girl across the classroom. "Remember you had the problem with the snails but you corrected it then. It's exactly the same as that."

The girl nodded and tried the spell again. Unfortunately it didn't work but she had the correct wand movements which was an important thing.

By the end of the lesson only several of the students had succeeded in vanishing their entire mouse, for which they had earned ten points a piece. Most people had managed to vanish parts of their mouse and only a couple of people had failed to vanish any of it. James thought they'd all done well as a first lesson on it.

"Alright well done to all of you as you've all tried your hardest," announced James. "If you've still got a mouse left or parts of a mouse could you please return it to the back of the room and then you can go because the bells going to ring any second now."

As the students left Lily approached James's desk smiling.

"So how did I do?" asked James, as he ran a hand through his hair.

"See for yourself," replied Lily placing the form in front of him as she stood behind him.

"You do know that you're not supposed to show me?"

"Yeah but you'd have found a way to see it anyway," stated Lily, now rubbing his shoulders skillfully.

"True." James grinned as he read what she'd answered.

**Professor Lily L Evans of Charms is reviewing: **_Professor James H D Potter of Transfiguration._

**Does the Professor seem confident in their teaching? **_Professor Potter has always been confident in what ever he has done and he definitely seems to be a natural teacher._

**Do they use appropriate rewards and punishments? **_He rewards when necessary but hasn't had the need to punish as none of his students broke any rules._

**Do the students concentrate in their class? **_All of them and they all try their hardest even if they find the subject particularly difficult. I believe that it is Professor Potter's faith in each and every one of them that makes them want to try._

**Do many students participate? **_Today's lesson was a practical and all the students did what was asked of them. Not all of them succeeded but many did thanks to Professor Potter's help._

**Does the Professor include as many people as possible? **_All of the class were involved with the work._

**Does the Professor have favourites? **_He treats all the students the same despite the differences in house, ability or in any other way. He's fair to all of them and teaches them all the same. _

**Are there any dangers in the class that the Professor has overlooked? **_There is always going to be a danger anywhere in Hogwarts. Students are learning to control magic, something which is hard to do especially if somebody is feeling a strong emotion such as fear or anger. The only way the Professor could possibly avoid danger of outbursts of magic is to keep a close eye on his students of which he does. _

**Have you got anything else to add? **_Professor Potter is a wonderful teacher. Although he, himself, thinks he lacks what he take to be a good teacher I believe he is wrong from what I have seen today. All the students seem to like him and are happy with what he's teaching them. He has a great knowledge for Transfiguration of which comes naturally to him and he is happy to share it._

"This makes the one I wrote for Slughorn look really bad," moaned James.

"Why did you write him a bad one?" asked Lily surprised.

"No not really," said James. "Just I'm not as articulate as you."

Lily laughed and continued to massage his shoulders and neck. "Your shoulders must ache. All your muscles are strained and knotted."

"Mmmmmm," sighed James contently, with his eyes closed. "You're really good. Ahh that's nice."

"I worked at a muggle massage parlour during the summer holiday before Seventh year," explained Lily, whilst continuing to knead his skin skilfully. "I can do your back if your want."

"You can do more than that," hinted James suggestively. "You know what they say about massages and happy endings."

"If you play your cards right," smirked Lily. "Then maybe you'll get yours."

"I'm a good boy," said James dramatically, grinning. "Take me to the bed and have your wicked way with me."

Lily rolled her eyes and a small smile crept its way onto her pretty face. "Take your top off and lie on your bed face down."

"You don't waste no time you, do you?" said James cheekily. She smacked his arm lightly but he stood up anyways.

"I'm just going to go back to my room to get the right aromatherapy oils," said Lily. "You go do what I told you to."

"You're going to make me smell like a girl aren't you?"

Ten minutes later James was naked from the waist up and had Lily straddling his bottom.

"Someone better not walk in on us," noted James smirking, his head turned sideways so his face wouldn't get squished into the pillow. "We're in a _very _compromising position. One I would hope to become even more compromising…."

Lily pinched him.

"Ow!" exclaimed James. "That hurt!"

"Stop being a baby," said Lily, before muttering, "Typical man." Under her breath.

"I heard that."

"Why do you think I said it loud enough?"

"Good point."

"I know," said Lily smiling as she covered her hands with generous amounts of lavender scented oil.

"That smells incredibly girly to me," said James, scrunching his face up.

Lily laughed serenely and leaned down towards his ear, her hair tickling his face and back, and whispered playfully, "That's because it is."

James turned his body around underneath her brushed his lips against hers, slipping his hands down to her waist. Before he could go any further Lily pulled herself back and sat up looking down at him smirking as he pouted.

"You need a massage," she said firmly.

"But I'm too impatient to wait for my happy ending," grinned James.

Lily rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"It was worth a try," said James smiling, turning over back onto his tummy. "But you know, you shouldn't tease a guy like that. It's just not fair for the guys who really can't control their urges."

"Well you better control yours," said Lily, massaging his back expertly.

"Mmmmmm," moaned James dreamily. "Yeah…course…."

Lily laughed and continued to knead up and down his back in between kisses and random chats for a good few hours before James suddenly moaned not in content but in pain.

"What?" asked Lily, anxiously. "Did I hurt you?"

"No," winced James as he tensed up and pressed his hand to his lower back, just below the waistband of his trousers. "It's not you."

"James, what is it then?" asked Lily fretfully. "You're scaring me."

"It's nothing," said James more relaxed. "It's stopped. I'm sorry for scaring you it's not a big deal."

"Yes it is," said Lily forcibly. "You were in pain. And that may not be a big deal to a big macho man like you but it is to me."

She slowly tugged down on his trousers until she found what caused the pain. The thin, red, slightly raised, curse scar that ran across the bottom of his back. He flinched as Lily traced it lightly with her fingers.

"Don't," said James harshly.

"Sorry," said Lily meekly, hastily retracting her fingers away from it.

"No I'm sorry," sighed James. "I didn't mean to snap. It's just that it's repulsive I don't know why you'd even want to…Gwen hates it."

"Why?" questioned Lily. "I mean, okay, so it's not the prettiest thing in the world but why hate it? Your trousers cover it up and if you think about it, it's only a line on the bottom of your back."

"Yeah but it symbolises weakness," explained James, still lying down on his front. "It shows that I was too weak. Too weak to dodge it. Too weak to fight back."

"James Harold Darwin Potter that is the most ridiculous thing that has ever come out of your mouth and let me tell you there has been quite a few ridiculous things," exclaimed Lily. "You are not weak. You were flying high up on a broom celebrating your win. You weren't expecting to get cursed. Nobody did. It was an especially dark and unheard of curse as well and you fell from about fifty feet, maybe more and you survived by miracle only. That doesn't make you weak it makes you a fighter."

Then she did something James never thought she would do. She bent down and pressed her lips tenderly against the scar. She trailed light kisses along slowly as if savouring each one. James smiled softly. It wasn't exactly what she was doing that meant so much, it was the gesture.

After she had placed the last kiss she sat up once again and James turned over so he was on his back staring up at her. She smiled sweetly down at him and he saw, for the first time as he had previously not being able to see her that her brilliant green eyes were glistening with tears. He gazed at her questioningly, not needed to ask in words, with his own hazel orbs filled with nothing but concern. He patted the space gesturing for her to lay down with him. She smiled sadly and crawled into bed beside him, her head resting on top of his bare chest. One of her hands next to her on the bed the other wrapped across his chest. His arms were securely around her and as she was lying on her side he rested his hands on her hip.

"Why are you crying?" asked James softly.

"I'm not," said Lily stubbornly.

"Yes you are," said James determinedly. "I can feel your tears dripping from your eyes onto my chest."

"I'm sorry."

"Hey I don't mind I just want to know why my Lily Flower is crying."

"You're bringing back memories."

"What of?"

"You," replied Lily, her voice weak. "And the day you were cursed. I didn't even know you anymore and I was still angry at you as you probably realised at the beginning of the year but it scared me so much. I thought you were dead. I'm not really into Quidditch much as you probably know but I always went to the Gryffindor matches at school out of house spirit.

After school I never really cared for it much and didn't go to any matches. Alice persuaded me to go to the World Final; after all it was the final. I didn't realise you'd be playing until I got there. I almost went back home but Alice made me stay. I spent the whole match glaring at you wishing you'd fall off your broom but then you actually did and I felt so bad. I felt like it was my fault and everybody in the audience thought you were dead and so did I.

Everyone was in a panic wanting to know if England's best chaser was alive and everyone was trying to run down to the pitch to see if you were okay but me, I was frozen. I was just stood there transfixed. Staring down at the pitch unable to move. Alice had to shake me for me to realise I had tears streaming down my face. As soon as we found out you were alive I wiped all my tears away and went back to hating you as per usual. But, in the time of not knowing, I didn't hate you, I didn't hate you at all. I don't know whether I was loving you or not but for that short amount of time I felt as though my world was turned upside once again by you. The funny thing is though, that afterwards I hated you more for being able to do that to me. I hated that you could have such an effect on me without actually being there."

James had kept himself silent and let her talk, and stroked her hair continually, soothing her. At the end he bent down and placed a sweet kiss on top of her head.

"That's all in the past now Lily," He said tenderly. "I don't care what you thought of me back then all I care about is how you think about me now. Me falling off my broom was in no way your fault and don't you dare think that again. It was just a very bad coincidence. All I hope is that you don't hate me anymore and that you're not tearing yourself up over what happened months ago."

Lily looked up at him and brushed her lips against his softly. He smiled and grabbed his wand and waved it around so the room fell into darkness.

"Sweet dreams, flower," murmured James before they were both taken over by sleep in each other's arms.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter Twenty Three

The rest of the week went by with no tears or depressing conversations of death and James was thankful for it. He didn't like reliving what he was feeling then either. He, himself, thought he was going to die that day and he never wanted to think like that again.

It was a Saturday today and he was excited for two reasons. For starters, it was a Quidditch match today and it would be the first one he would be going to see at Hogwarts as a professor. It was actually the fourth match of the season but he didn't have the time to see the others and he wasn't particularly interested in them. Today it was Gryffindor Versus Slytherin. James had always thought this pairing was always the best match because although Gryffindor were the best (a bit of favouring there) Slytherin were the team who could challenge them the most.

As well as Quidditch it was also Valentine's Day today and he wanted to do something special for Lily. He had already sent a pink teddy bear and a bunch of roses to Gwen and she had sent him a bottle of firewhiskey. He had thought about it for a bit and decided to not give her a material gift of sorts, well not the main part of the gift anyways.

In the evening Dumbledore had planned a Valentines Ball for the students. It was going to start at six in the evening for all students and they were to have a Valentines themed meal, then afterwards most tables would vanish and the band Dumbledore had organised would come on. First Years through to Third Years could only stay until nine but for the older students the Ball would end at midnight. The attire was to be formal but it could be either Muggle or Magic formal wear.

Although the Ball started at six the professors were required to be there at three until five to help decorate the Great Hall. The Quidditch started promptly at eleven and would probably last about an hour. That left him three hours to do something special for Lily.

He was lost in thoughts about all of this whilst eating his breakfast. He was only brought out of these thoughts by someone pulling them into a hug unexpectedly. He looked at the person to see Lily smiling radiantly at him.

"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" exclaimed Lily. "It was the perfect gift ever."

"The book?"

"Yes," laughed Lily. "A first edition of The Complete Illustrated Stories of The Brothers Grimm. It must have cost a fortune. You really didn't have to."

James smiled warmly. "Yeah I did actually and I don't care if cost a fortune as long as you liked it. You did like it didn't you?"

"I loved it."

"Then that's all that matters," grinned James. "Besides that's only part of your Valentine's present."

"James you've already spent enough as it is!"

"The next present didn't cost any money at all," protested James. "Come on everyone's going down to the Quidditch Pitch."

He'd guess that the entire school had turned up to see the match as the stands were packed full. Luckily for him the professor's stand was a lot less cramped then the Gryffindor stands he used to dwell in. As the commentator, a cheeky fourth year from Gryffindor, Michael Turner started announcing the players coming on to the pitch it brought the memories of his first ever Quidditch game at Hogwarts.

_Twelve year old James Potter stood nervously at the front with his captain and fellow chaser, Nicola Hopkins. She was a tall seventh year with long dirty blonde hair braided into a plait so not to bother her whilst flying._

"_Are you scared?"_

_James just nodded his face pale as snow. Usually he was the most confident boy at Hogwarts, cocky one might say, but now he was petrified._

"_Don't worry," said Nicola kindly. "Everyone feels like that just before their first game. Just play like you do in practice and you'll be fine. You're a natural at Quidditch."_

"_What happened in your first game?" asked James, finally finding his voice._

"_I was a second year and feeling scared just like you," said Nicola. "I scored ten minutes in and then a Seventh Year Slytherin chaser knocked me off my broom. I woke up in the Hospital Wing a week later. But don't worry you'll do fine."_

_James nodded with his eyes wide and terrified. He was even paler than before. _

"_Ooh it's started," exclaimed Nicola, "Come on lets make our entrance."_

_James gulped and gripped his broom tightly, his knuckles whiter than his face._

James grinned. After his first match, which they won and James had scored three times, he wasn't scared at all at the beginning of Quidditch matches. Okay so he was always a bit nervous but he was confident. Over the years, especially when he became captain in his Fifth Year he used to show off to the audience at the beginning and was cheered on like a hero. Yeah Lily was right about the arrogance thing.

He looked over to see Lily next to him, her fiery hair blowing around in the wind, her cheeks tinged pink with excitement. He grinned at her, feeling happy that she was happy, after all Quidditch was more his thing and she was having a good time. She smiled back before casting her eyes once more at the pitch.

It was a close call but Gryffindor scraped a win by thirty points thanks to Felicity Miles the scrawny third year seeker. James had to admit she was really good. She could play professionally one day he thought. The beaters weren't too bad although one of them had a dodgy aim but he made up for that with the sheer force he could hit the bludgers with. All three chasers worked in perfect harmony with each other. It made James yearn to be back on the pitch flying around with the Quaffle with the England team again.

"The game's over James," said Lily waving a hand in front of his face. He didn't even realise that everyone was leaving and he had zoned out into his thoughts. "Are we going to the Great Hall for lunch?"

"Sorry about that," said James with a flash of his lopsided grin. "No I'm taking you somewhere for the rest of your Valentines present."

Lily tried to look stern but failed as her soft pink lips bowed into a smile. "James you didn't have to even get me that great book let alone anything else."

"Yeah but I found out something the other day which means you deserve so much more," grinned James, glancing around noticing they were now the only ones left in he stadium. "Why didn't you tell me it was you're birthday over two weeks ago?"

"Because I don't like a big fuss on my birthday," admitted Lily, looking down at the floor.

"Lily, Aurora only found out because she saw a birthday card from Alice in your office," said James. "And she told me that was the only birthday card there. Why don't you celebrate you're birthday?"

"I stopped ever since my parents died!" snapped Lily, a tear tickling down her face. "Every birthday all I remember is them. The way my Dad would always give me a piggy back down the stairs and my mother would always have strawberries and cream ready for breakfast. I miss them too much to be happy on my birthday."

"But you deserve to be happy," said James softly as he gently wiped away her tears and caressed her cheek. "Yeah you'll always miss them at times like that but that doesn't mean you still can't celebrate them. Your parents would want you to be happy Lily."

"I know," said Lily smiling again. "I'm just being stupid."

"Yes you are," grinned James. "So are you going to stop complaining about how much have I may have spent on you and let me actually give you the best Valentines Day slash Birthday ever?"

Lily leaned forward slightly and brushed her lips against his.

"Well I guess that answers my question," said James happily, grabbing Lily's hand. "Come on then."

He led her down the stands to the empty Quidditch pitch where one lone broomstick was set on the floor.

Lily raised an eyebrow questionably up at James who now had a big grin on his face.

"I am going to teach you how to fly," said James, gesturing to the broom.

"I know how to fly a broom James," said Lily in a bored tone. "And you know I don't like to fly."

"That's the thing. You don't know how to fly a broom," said James, as Lily started to protest he held a hand up. "You can ride a broom but you can't fly it."

"There the same thing," objected Lily.

"No there not. You've only been on a broom when you have to. That's riding. When you see it as a chore," explained James. "Flying is so much different. It's exhilarating and calming. Everything's different when you're up their. There's no Voldemort, there's no war, there's no problems, there's no Gw-. It's just nice."

Lily smiled. "You really love flying don't you?"

"Yeah."

"And you won't let me fall?"

"Course I wouldn't."

"Ok then," smiled Lily. "Teach me how to fly."

James grinned. He grabbed his broom, mounted it and hovered low in front of Lily.

He offered out his hand and put on a posh old fashioned accent. "Mi'Lady."

Lily giggled but took his hand and he helped her on the broom so she was sitting in front of him with his arms securely around her and controlling the broom easily with one hand. He could feel her tense up as they started ascending.

"It's ok," whispered James, into her ear. "I'd never let you fall." She relaxed against him and James smiled.

He did a few laps around the pitch at a fairly low height until she got used to being on the broom with him.

"Close your eyes."

"What?" said Lily, turning her head around to face him in alarm.

"You heard me. Close your eyes."

Lily shook her head stubbornly.

James sighed before asking, "Do you trust me?"

He searched her emerald green eyes for the answer as she seemed to be frozen. The question was more serious than it intended to be. Before he spoke he meant it in the now but now he knew he was asking whether she trusted him with her life.

"I think so," breathed Lily.

"Close your eyes then," said James softly. "It'll be worth it believe me."

She didn't protest this time and she closed her eyes for him. He gently kissed each eyelid before speedily flying upwards. He felt her tense up once more and heard her breath in deeply. He gave her a reassuring squeeze with his free arm and felt her relax again once more. He slowed down a bit so she wasn't too scared by the change. Once he had reached the right spot he quietly told her to open her eyes.

She gasped and James couldn't blame her; the view was spectacular. They were incredibly high up and it made Hogwarts small compared to the huge snowy mountains surrounding it. The Black Lake was iced up and it glistened and shone. The forbidden Forest still had remains of snow upon the tree tops.

"You like it?"

"It's beautiful," said Lily with her dazzling smile. "I love it. It's the perfect spot to see Hogwarts and all its scenery."

"During school I used to fly up here all the time," confessed James. "Usually because of you."

"Because of me?"

"Yeah," admitted James. "I came here nearly every time I asked you out and you said no. I know I was incredibly tactless and a big jerk but it hurt every time I was rejected so I'd come up here and it would calm me down. I'd come up here determined to forget about you and move on but I'd come down again filled with hope."

"I'm sorry."

"What for?" smiled James, bemused.

"I used to think you were always joking around," explained Lily. "You always put on a big show when asking me out and every time I rejected you you'd always smile and laugh it off. I never realized I hurt you for all those years."

"Nah it wasn't your fault," grinned James. "Like I said I was a tactless jerk Lily but I was only ever a tactless jerk around you. I was always a tactless jerk to impress you. Stupid really when you think about it."

"You weren't stupid. Well actually you were stupid," laughed Lily.

"Thanks," said James pouting, yet his eyes were twinkling with amusement.

"Awww don't worry I'll make it all better for you," she whispered as she managed to wriggle about on the broom so she could kiss him properly. As she wrapped her arms around his neck the broom moved sharply causing them to break apart and James having to grab Lily's waist to stop her from falling off. She was breathing deeply. James didn't know if it was from the kiss or the sudden jerky movement from the broom but he suspected it was from the latter.

"I did say I wouldn't let you fall," said James with his trademark lopsided grin placed firmly on his face.

"We are never ever kissing on a broom again," said Lily firmly, slapping his arm yet smiling all the same. "And we need to go down and go to the Great Hall to set up for the ball."

James smiled mischievously. Lily's eyes widened when she saw his look.

"James Potter don't you dare di-VVVVVVEEEE!!!!"


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter Twenty Four

James and Lily were the last professors to arrive at the Great Hall. Lily with a pink tinged face and James adorned with a sheepish smile. Dumbledore beckoned them to join the others, stood in the centre of the hall.

"Now that everybody is present," started Dumbledore, staring at James slightly suspiciously. "We can begin. Lily, Aurora and Charity I would like you to take care of the indoor decorations. Pomona, Marcus, Rolanda and Melinda to take care of the grounds. Try making it extra special. Horace and Artemis, I need you to go don to the kitchens and work out a menu with the house elves." 

There was a brief pause before everyone scurried off to where they needed to be, leaving James stood there awkwardly, his hands stuffed inside his pockets.

"Don't worry James you're with me," said Dumbledore with a smile that made James feel uneasy. He returned it with a queasy looking smile. Surely Dumbledore didn't know; how could he? Then again, Dumbledore seemed to know everything.

"And what will we be doing?" asked James, looking at Dumbledore, but his eyes set their sights just beyond him. Lily was laughing at Aurora, harmoniously. Her face bursting with amusement as Aurora literally got tangled up within her own spell.

The sound of Dumbledore's old, wise voice brought James back into focus.

"We shall be transfiguring the house tables into smaller tables and chairs," explained Dumbledore. "I think I will do the stage later, whilst everyone goes to get ready."

"Yeah sure," said James, nodding his head. "Which do you want to do then: tables or chairs?"

"I'm quite partial to a certain type of chair," replied Dumbledore wistfully. "I'm sure you'll be ok with the tables."

James nodded and twiddled his wand between his fingers before setting off to work. At first he chopped up all the house tables, into smaller bench like tables. As he was doing this, Dumbledore had taken on chair and was transforming it every few seconds, trying to find the right style. James couldn't really do anything else the style of chair had been determined so he could make the tables match.

"Do you remember what I told you at the beginning of the year?" asked Dumbledore offhandedly, testing the comfort levels of a light pink, cushioned, metal chair. He had a smile on his face so James figured that chair had all the perfect chair requirements.

"You've told me a lot of things, sir," started James, feigning confusion even though he had picked up on what Dumbledore had meant. "You're going to have to remind me."

"The rules about professors being intimately involved," replied Dumbledore, his usually twinkley blue eyes looking him dead in the eyes.

"Oh that conversation," proclaimed James, running a nervous hand through his messy hair. "Yeah, it rings a bell."

"Really? After looking at both yours and Miss Evans's behaviour, I thought you'd forgotten all about it."

James frowned but tried to look innocent. Dumbledore never raised his voice, he always spoke calmly but when angry at someone, that calm voice would be smothered in disappointment. It was enough to make even a heartless person feel guilty.

"Lily and I are friends," said James slowly. "Only. Our friendship hasn't always been this smooth, as you already know, but it's wonderful now and I cherish it. I wouldn't do anything to ruin it."

"You have a hot head James," explained James sighing. "You think after you act. I wouldn't want you to do something you'll regret."

"Look, Professor, you may think I'm the same hot headed arrogant boy I was back when I was a student," argued James coolly. "But I'm not. I've grown up. I thought you knew that in my seventh year when you made me Head Boy or even this year when you gave me the job of professor."

"I know you've grown up James," sighed Dumbledore, get smiling fondly at James, like a father would when proud of their child. "You're more mature than most people I'm acquainted with these days but it only takes a small reminder of your past, to make you act immaturely. I'm only afraid that Lily is your reminder."

"Professor, I'm happier now than I have been in years. I have a great job, fabulous friends, a wonderful family and a loving girlfriend who's carrying my child," said James, almost pleadingly. "Why would I want to ruin that? Why would I ruin that for something you say is only a reminder?"

Dumbledore smiled. "Either you have truly, truly grown up, James, or you are a really good liar."

James laughed before quickly going back to transfiguring the now smaller tables into circular, silver tables. After a while and all the tables looked like that he walked around the room, tapping each table three times with his wand. Pink sparks flew out of his wand each time and light pink place mats appeared where Dumbledore had placed the chairs.

"Wow you've even made them match the chairs," teased Lily, from behind him. "Who knew that straight guys could be so colour coordinated? Or maybe there's something you're not telling me."

"Hahaha very funny," said James, glaring at her playfully. "You know, more than most, that I am straight. Very straight. Straighter than straight. In fact I am super straight."

"You seem very insecure about your sexuality, James," smirked Lily. "Who are you trying to convince me or you?"

She giggled at his shocked expression, and even more so when he started spluttering in his defence.

"Oh don't have a hissy fit," said Lily, stifling her giggles with the back of her hand. "I know you're not gay. I've got gay friends and you're not gay."

"Who do you know whose gay?" asked James, curiosity getting the better of him.

"Marcus."

"Marcus? As in Warrick?"

"The one and only."

"Seriously? I mean, apart from me obviously, I thought he was the most macho man here."

"Being gay doesn't always include pink glitter and feather boas you know."

"I know that," said James exasperatedly. "Cause, you know, if it did, I would have suspected Sirius of being gay a long time ago."

"Sirius likes pink glitter and feather boas?"

"Loves them," replied James, with a serious face but with laughter dancing in his eyes. "In his apartment he's got two bedrooms: his room and his real room. His room is just the room he uses when he brings home girls, or I use it occasionally, his real room is… different to put it likely."

"Okay so now I'm intrigued," chuckled Lily.

"His room is more girly than yours," smirked James. "Well it's black with a great giant black bed with sparkly pink pillows and lots of pink drapes everywhere."

"Why doesn't he bring girls there?" asked Lily, confused. "It sounds like a really nice room, girly yes, but really nice."

"Oh he's also got lots of posters of muggle women wearing bikinis or even less."

"Well that explains it then," laughed Lily. "You haven't commented on mine, Aurora and Charity's decorations."

"Sorry, I'd only just finished what I was doing when I started to talk to you," apologised James softly.

He then took the time to look around the newly transformed Great Hall. It looked amazing. The candles flickered pinks and reds instead of oranges and yellows. Silver and pink drapes adorned the stone walls. A strange yet oddly beautiful pink moist floated around James's ankles and the rest of the flooring. He found it incredibly that it created warmth. The best feature of all the decorations was something he guessed to be Lily's clever wand work. Floating up high, near the sky-like ceiling, were twenty or so pink heart shaped balloons. Every so often one would explode and silver glitter would sprinkle don over everything yet it would disappear several inches above James's head. After that the balloon would reappear again and another balloon would explode.

"Nice, huh?"

"It's incredible," smiled James, completely in awe. "I take it, that this is all your doing?"

"I did the balloons and it was my idea for the pink mist but Charity did that. Aurora did the drapes and lighting. Do you really like it?" asked Lily, hopefully.

He thought that she looked like a child waiting for their parent's proud praise, at that moment. He smiled warmly and smiled even more she herself wore a radiant smile.

"I love it."

James had decided to wear muggle formal wear for the ball and to stick with the Valentine's Day theme he was wearing a pink shirt, with his black suit jacket and trousers. His shirt was untucked and he had left the top buttons undone, but instead of looking scruffy he thought he looked rather good. Then again his own opinion was probably a little biased, thought James.

The Ball, itself, he thought was a huge success. It was now past eleven so only the older students and professors remained, although some professors had left to patrol the school to make sure the younger ones were in bed. Thankfully it wasn't James's day to patrol so he was stood by the drinks table, holding a cup of punch, taking a sip of it every so often.

"Hey," smiled Lily, about to take some punch from the bowl nearest James. He grabbed her wrists and redirected them to a different bowl. She gave him a questioning glance, her eyebrows high on her forehead.

"That one's been spiked," simply said James.

"And how would you know?" asked Lily, her hand on her hip.

"Because I was the one who spiked it."

"James!"

"What?"

"You put alcohol into a punch bowl that underage students are drinking out of," said whispered Lily furiously, as though afraid someone would over hear them. "You do realise how irresponsible that is."

"I spiked it after all the younger ones went to bed," said James, taking another sip of his drink. "I'm pretty sure everyone here has had alcohol before anyways."

"James that's not the point, if Dumbledore had seen you, or anyone else for that matter, you could have been in serious trouble."

"If I was going to get through the night I needed a drink," said James dryly. "Ball's are only fun when you can actually participate properly and even then they're over-rated."

"They're not over-rated," scoffed Lily. "Why wouldn't you let me drink the spiked punch anyway?"

"Because you can't take your alcohol and you'd do something stupid in front of everyone," laughed James. "I thought you'd appreciate me stopping you from doing so."

Lily scowled but reluctantly smiled a few seconds later. James had to admit, she looked good tonight, and he couldn't touch her. The world was so incredibly unfair. She was wearing a beautiful periwinkle blue, full length dress with spaghetti straps and gently curved neckline. The bodice was beaded with pretty floral embroidery. With that she wore simple silver stilettos and silver studs in her ears. Her long red curly hair had been fashioned into an elegant French twist at the back of her head. Her make up was very discreet and she only wore it to accentuate her features not paint all over them as most girls did recently.

"You want to dance?" she asked, smiling brightly.

James frowned. "I don't think we should."

"Why not?"

"It's not that I don't want to because I do," said James sincerely. "It's just that Dumbledore is kind of onto us."

"He knows we're secretly a couple behind everybody's backs, you mean?"

"Yeah," said James, "Whilst we were doing the tables and chairs he was saying that he had worked out, from our behaviour, that we were together or that we wanted to or something of that nature."

"And by us two dancing he would automatically assume that he was right earlier?"

"Well yeah."

"I've danced with every male staff member tonight," commented Lily, putting down her drink. "Including Dumbledore himself and I am going to dance with you."

He couldn't exactly say no, could he?

He took her hand and led her out to the dance floor, pink mist, swirling around their feet. He placed one of his hands at the small of her back and the he held hers with the other. She had her free hand resting on his shoulder. As they gently swayed they chatted away.

"At least we know Voldemort isn't going to ruin this ball," grinned Lily.

James sighed softly. "Don't joke about things like that Lily, you have no idea how I felt that night."

"I do."

He nodded knowing she was talking about the Quidditch World Cup.

"Let's just dance," he said smiling warmly. She nodded smiling sweetly back up at him, as they both lost themselves in the music and each other.

"Do you want to go?" asked Lily, biting her lip, fifteen minutes later. "The ball's going to be over soon anyway."

"Yeah sure, you want to leave together separately or together," he asked grinning, laughing about earlier and how they thought Dumbledore knew. She rolled her pretty emerald green eyes.

"How about you go to my room now and I'll meet you there in ten minutes?" suggested Lily, smiling flirtatiously. "Whilst I go say bye to Rory."

"That sounds like a good plan to me," he exclaimed smirking.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter Twenty Five

The Easter holidays had arrived early this year and it made James incredibly happy for many reasons. First off, well of course it was Easter which meant chocolate. Secondly, he knew Gwen was at some modelling thing in Milan so he could spend some alone time with Lily. It made him feel guilty all this sneaking around but he couldn't stop himself.

The intense feelings he had for Lily were insatiable. He knew it was wrong, so wrong, but he had a plan. He would spend the remaining year with Lily and when he was finally married to Gwen he would be completely faithful to her and spend the rest of his life with her and their daughter. Simple.

Of course, another reason as to why the Easter holidays were so great – his birthday.

James was giddy at any time he received presents but he especially loved his birthday. Christmas is shared by practically everybody that meant it wasn't as special but James knew no one who shared his birthday. It was his day. Party time!

It was the night before they left Hogwarts for the holidays and he and Lily were currently relaxing in his rather large bathtub, glass of wine in hand, the white foamy bubbles completely covering them up to their collarbones.

"Stay with me in the Easter holidays," blurted out James spontaneously. Oh crap, thought James, as he saw her perfectly groomed eyebrows raised in an arch.

She laughed. A good sign? Or not?

"James I stayed with you over the Christmas holidays," explained Lily, smiling. "I don't want to be a trouble to you or your family again. Besides, I do actually have my own place you know."

"You're not a trouble," he insisted, splashing through the water to get to her hand. "I have my own place too so it's not as though you'd be a burden to the whole family - just me." He smirked. "You only stayed last holidays on Dumbledore's orders anyways."

"What about Gwen?" sighed Lily, leaning back against her side of the tub. "I've got a feeling she wouldn't like the dirty mistress staying with you two."

"Gwen's not going to be there. She's in Milan for some modelling thing," said James exasperatedly before softening his tone. "And you're not a dirty mistress, Lily."

"Then what am I to you?" asked Lily, her voice calm yet he knew that she was doubting herself and even him. Lily always appeared confident but if you knew her the way he did she was an open book.

He smiled softly, gently pulling her towards him through the water and put his forehead close to hers, their noses brushing against each others.

"You're the woman I love," he whispered. "You should know that by now."

"I'm sorry," she smiled. "I'm being stupid."

"You're only being stupid if you don't stay at my apartment over the holidays," grinned James.

"Looks like I'm going to be a very clever girl than," smirked Lily, before closing the gap between them completely.

Both wine glasses dropping to the floor.

"Hey stop running!" called out James to several first years who went flying past him desperate to get to the train despite the fact they had another thirty minutes before the gleaming red train departed. He sighed as one of them tripped up and crashed into a suit of armour.

"Are you ok?" he asked the blonde headed girl. Her cheeks flushed rosy pink as she nodded. "Up you get then." He stretched out his hand to her and hauled her up on her feet gently.

"Thank you sir," stammered the little Hufflepuff.

"You're welcome," said James as he smiled comfortingly. "You're friends seem to be waiting for you."

She nodded and scampered off towards her giggling friends.

"Awww aren't you thoughtful," smirked Lily, leaning against the stone wall, arms crossed.

"I'm just so wonderful," grinned James playfully. "You sure you want to stay with me? You don't have to if you don't want to."

"It beats being lonely in my apartment," laughed Lily. "Will it just be me and you?"

"Not really…."

"What do you mean?" she asked suspiciously.

"Well I have my birthday bash tomorrow night so they'll definitely be more than just us then."

"You're having a party?"

"Not really," explained James. "It'll be me, you, the Marauders, Frank and Alice are coming and I've invited Aurora too."

"I didn't know you and Aurora were such good friends," said Lily bemused.

"We're not really, but I figured you'd want some female company," laughed James. "I'm friends with Alice so I might as well be friends with Aurora too."

"You're sweet," smiled Lily. "Wow, I haven't seen Alice since the summer. Sure, I write to her but it's not the same."

"You've got Aurora here though, that must help."

"Yeah Rory's become one of my best friends now," admitted Lily. "I hope her and Alice get on."

"Course they will," said James confidently. "Sirius didn't get on with Remus at first but now he's probably closer to Remus than he is to me."

"I somehow can't believe that," said Lily shocked. "For as long as I can remember all four of you have been so close knit. I used to be so jealous of that."

"Sirius is a good actor when he wants to be," laughed James. "Why were you jealous of that? You had Alice and other friends."

"You were like brothers but you're not even related," described Lily. "I had, have, friends but I didn't have that with my sister."

He rested is hands on her shoulders. "That's her fault not yours; don't blame yourself because of her jealousy."

"When are we leaving then?" asked Lily brightly, swiftly changing the subject.

"Whenever you want," smiled James, taking a mental note to bring up this subject once more.

James was glad he had written to Sirius previously to kick him out whilst him and Lily were going to be there. He was also glad he made sure Sirius tidied and cleaned before they arrived although he had his suspicions that Remus had done the cleaning and tidying as the place was spotless and Sirius and cleaning spells just didn't mix.

He was slightly nervous about the fact Lily had never been to his apartment but then again she had met his parents and going to his place is nothing compared to that. He felt stupid standing awkwardly as Lily explored his lounge, picking up various photographs from his mantelpiece and inspected each one with interest.

"You've got a nice place," commented Lily.

"You've only seen the lounge."

"Well then you've got a nice lounge."

He laughed.

"One thing though."

"What's that?"

"All the photographs and everything else are yours; where are Gwen's things?"

"She's basically moved out," admitted James, running a hand through his hair. "She doesn't ant to be alone during the pregnancy so she moved back in with her parents until we're married. Sirius and Remus are actually living here now but I kicked them out whilst we're here."

"Why are they living here?"

"Because I have a better apartment?" offered James as an explanation. "I have no idea to be honest."

Lily laughed. "Are you going to show me around then?"

He grinned and grabbed her hand.

"Well obviously this is the lounge and up those steps is the kitchen as you can see," said James excitedly.

The room was spacious but it definitely had a lived in feel despite the fact James was rarely at his apartment at all these days. The red carpet was soft and springy, the black leather sofa and armchairs were squishy and the black marble fireplace gleamed wonderfully.

The kitchen, only a step up from the lounge, had no wall separating the two rooms so it automatically looked bigger. The sparkling counter tops were black marble, matching the mantle piece. In fact, the whole kitchen was done in black. It was sophisticated and everything was top of the range. There was no dining table but there was coffee table in the lounge. In the middle of the kitchen there was a rectangular table with a black marble top with four red stools along one side of it.

"Your kitchen actually makes me want to cook and I hate cooking," laughed Lily.

"I hope you have the same reaction to my bedroom," smirked James.

"You hope your bedroom makes me want to cook?" she giggled.

"You know what I mean," grinned James, sticking out his tongue light-heartedly.

"We'll have to wait and see won't we," she teased as she started swinging their hands, indicating she wanted to move on.

"Right which hallway you want to go down first: right or left?"

She scrunched her nose up in thought. It was such a cute thing to do.

"Right," she decided.

"Ahh the guest quarters," remarked James in a posh English accent. Lily giggled softly.

"You're so immature," she said rolling her eyes.

"You know one day you're going to do that and they'll get stuck," warned James playfully.

"Well then you'll have to stop doing stupid things then," she replied sticking out her tongue.

"Now who's immature," he muttered as he led her down the hallway as she laughed.

The white walls of the hallway were bright but in a friendly way not a horrible sterilised hospital. There were three dark wooden doors; one to the left, one to the right, and one straight forward.

"The one on the left is just a bathroom," explained James, clearly not too interested in this part of his apartment. "The other two are spare bedrooms. Sirius and Remus usually crash their occasionally but they're not their rooms officially. They're unimportant rooms though."

"What about Peter?"

"What do you mean what about Peter?" asked James bemused.

"You say Sirius and Remus crash there. Peter is your friend too, what about him?" inquired Lily curiously, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

"We haven't really heard much from him since he started travelling abroad about a week before I started teaching," answered James. "He's due to arrive home for next Christmas. Lucky guy's probably having way too much fun to write to us."

"I feel happy for Peter," said Lily smiling. "He seemed to always be in the background at school. I mean you, Sirius and Remus practically ruled the school together, you were the golden boy quidditch prince, Sirius was the playboy that broke nearly every girl's heart at least once, and Remus was the clever prefect that everybody liked. Everybody used to wonder why you hung about with Peter; they all thought he was a loser compared to the three of you."

"That's because most teenagers are shallow," said James bitterly. "Just because Peter wasn't the typical popular boy it doesn't mean he's less of a person. He's a loyal friend to me, like a brother."

"I know," she smiled. "He has his own charms I suppose."

James laughed and nodded. "Come on I need to show you the rest of my oh so fabulous apartment."

They retraced their steps back to the lounge and then went through the other door. This was his part of the apartment. Of course the whole apartment was his but he spent his time here, in fact he rarely ventured into the other area. Only to show guests where they would sleep or on an occasion like this when he was giving a tour of his home.

"To the left is my study, which you will be delighted to know is filled with books," smirked James smugly.

"Wow you can read?" gasped Lily mockingly.

"Hahaha and I can count to ten," grinned James. She giggled and pushed open the door.

Her face was overflowing with excitement. Three sides of the wall were crammed from floor to ceiling with books. James smiled gently as she walked around the room, her finger tips brushing against the different books. Occasionally she'd pull it out and read the back of it then nod as though saying 'I'll be reading you later'.

On the other side James kept all his trophies and awards, each neatly placed in glass display case. The awards ranged from Quidditch to old school ones to Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award. What could he say, he was a versatile man.

Lily gazed up at all the shining and glittering trophies in awe. She turned and smiled proudly at him.

"Even when I used to hate you at Hogwarts I knew you'd be the student most likely to succeed," she admitted, smiling.

"You call this succeeding?" he asked, gesturing to all his awards and shaking his head in disagreement. "Nah that's just me showing off on a broomstick and being able to look good. That's not succeeding, at least its not succeeding in something worthwhile. You're the one who succeeded the most: you have a brilliant mind and you used it to save lives as a healer and now you're passing down your knowledge to students. You deserve all the awards in the world."

"James you underestimate yourself," she said gently, softly cupping his face. "You made people smile during these dark times. You may have been showing off on a broomstick but that showing off made people happy. Now you're passing down your knowledge as well. Dumbledore gave you head boy in seventh year for a reason James. You are one of the most intelligent people I know. You should be proud of your achievements, all of them, even your award winning smile."

He grinned briefly before swooping his head down to meet her lips in a sweet tender kiss. However their romantic euphoric moment was shortly interrupted by shouts coming from the living room.

"James? Come on out. I know you're home," came a voice that sounded awfully like Sirius. "Everybody's here we thought we'd start the party early. Don't have a clue where Lily is though but hurry up!"

"They're all going to think we were doing something we shouldn't if we go into the lounge now," whispered Lily frantically. "They'll think we came from your bedroom."

"Oh crap."


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter Twenty Six

"Should I apparate out?" suggested Lily, biting her lip nervously. James's face lit up at the clever idea but the little happy light in his head distinguished.

"My apartment is surrounded by an anti apparition shield," explained James, his face annoyed. "To stop crazy fans from stalking me."

"Brilliant," muttered Lily sarcastically.

"You wanted to see the library," snapped James, running a hand through his messy black hair forcefully.

"You wanted to give me a tour!" argued back Lily, her voice steadily rising louder and higher.

"You wanted to come here for the Easter Holidays!"

"You invited me!" screamed Lily, her fiery red hair had been in an immaculate French plait only several hours ago. Now strands were flying loose all over the place. It only added to the scariness of her red head temper thought James.

"You do both realise the neighbours are just positively amused by your little debate," commented Sirius smugly, leaning against the doorframe casually, yet elegantly. Honestly he looked like he'd just walked off from a random photo shoot.

Lily and James's heads both turned around to stare at Sirius in shock before realising how close they had gotten whilst fighting with their chests heaving up down. If Sirius hadn't heard them shouting then he'd have been having rather suspicious thoughts about the two although he probably was now – arguments between two sexes clearly meant sexual tension. They sprang apart suddenly. It was almost comical.

"My, my, my isn't this cosy," remarked Aurora, popping her head around the doorframe briefly, her long black hair swishing about.

"We were just discussing something of no importance," said Lily shrilly, walking out of the door with her head held high and her face almost the same shade as her hair. Embarrassment really wasn't kind to redheads James decidedly sympathetically.

"God, you got to love her, haven't you?" he said, following her out, grinning like an idiot. Aurora had gone with Lily to go greet Frank and Alice with shrieks and hugs but Sirius held him back.

"You're an idiot," Sirius stated stonily, with an added flick of the hair. Ooh a strand was out of place whatever shall we do?

"Why?" asked James bluntly, his attractive face bemused.

"Because you've got a gorgeous yet somewhat annoying pregnant fiancée somewhere in Milan and you're flirting with your past; some fling."

"You know damn well Lily was more than a fling," argued James, getting angry.

"Yeah I do. I know how much Lily meant to you, that's in the past though. It's not worth the risk now," shouted Sirius. "She's not worth the risk."

"But what if she is?" bellowed James.

"Is she worth your fiancée? Family's reputation? How are you're parents going to feel when they find out you've been shagging your ex-girlfriend behind your future wife's back? Is it worth all of that?" barked Sirius. "Is she worth your job?"

"Maybe she is!"

Neither of them had noticed that Lily, Aurora, Remus, Alice and frank where stood watching and listening in interest. None of them had seen them argue this much since fifth year when Sirius lead Snape to the Whomping Willow on a Full Moon. Lily's face showed a mixture of embarrassment, shame and shock. She looked helpless as the scene unfolded before them.

"What's the point James? I've known you all your life and you've never been this reckless over anything. When you think about it you're willing to take all those risks just before one last fling before marriage. She's only a fling."

"Don't say that, I love her!" shouted James before punching Sirius right in the face. The girls screamed. Sirius staggered slightly backwards, blood dripping from his nose, his expression holding anger, surprise but mainly hurt. That didn't stop him. Although wounded he managed to send a pretty good punch James's way. It was his turn to stagger backwards. Alice and Aurora were in hysterics. Remus seemed unsure what to do – it was rare he saw his friends like this. Sirius and James were usually like brothers and even if they did fight it was little scraps not fully blown punch-you-in-the-face kind of fights. As a precaution he held his wand out steadily before him, in case either o the two idiots were clever – yet in a way stupid enough – to start duelling.

As James raised his fist to punch Sirius again Lily quickly darted forward and bravely stood in the middle of the fighters, whilst her friends shrieked in fear. They obviously thought she would get caught in the crossfire, thought James, but he'd never hit her – ever.

"Don't you dare," she warned him, her voice deadly low. James looked at her with such a defeated face it almost broke her heart. He was ashamed of his own brutish antics. He rarely raised his fist to a stranger who really offended him let alone his own best friend. Remus and the girls were now cleaning up Sirius as he glared at James.

Lily raised her own fist and slapped James swiftly across the face. He was shocked to say the least as he rubbed the stinging red mark on his already hurt cheek.

"That's for being a jerk and hitting your best friend." He was ashamed of himself but Lily wasn't finished. She slapped him sharply for a second time.

"And that's for saying you love me." James's heart broke in two. I mean, how many girls slapped you for saying that you loved them?

Then she reached up on her tip toes and pulled down the back of his head and kissed him hard and quickly stepped back before he even had the chance to wrap his arms around her waist. James was confused and slightly dazed. Lily smiled.

"That's for saying you love me." James burst out into a grin and hugged her, spinning her around so her feet were off the plush carpeted flooring.

"Wow, she's confusing. Even for a girl," commented Sirius, massaging his jaw. Alice smacked him over the head.

"Let them be happy, Siri," she said softly, tucking her curly blonde hair behind her ear. "Everyone here knows it can't last forever – we know it can barely last another couple of two months. Then we all know they're going to have to part and be miserable. They really are in love; let them enjoy it whilst they can."

Sirius smiled. "I know that. Part of me wants them to live happily ever after forever but deep down I know they can't. It was the wrong time and wrong place for all this to happen. Lily was meant to be getting married to James not Gwen but things happen. If they hadn't have split up all those years ago they'd have probably had a family by now. Even though Lily claimed she hated him all those years at Hogwarts everybody could see there was a spark between them."

"You actually sounded like you were an intellectual who knew what emotions were then, Padfoot," chipped in Remus, smirking.

Sirius pouted and tossed his glossy black hair back.

"Awww don't be mean," said Aurora. "I'm sure he has many good attributes."

"Hmmm," smirked Sirius sexily. "Can I escort you to the lounge my fair lady?"

"You may indeed Sir Sirius," answered Aurora giggling, taking his offered arm.

"That poor girl," muttered Frank. "We've unleashed evil."

Alice laughed and started to drag her husband and Remus out of the hallway leaving James and Lily alone.

"You shouldn't have punched Sirius," said Lily softly. "He was only telling you what's right."

"He is right," agreed James, putting his forehead against hers softly. "But I don't care. I am madly head of heels crazy in love with you Lily Evans."

"I love you too," she murmured before they pair kissed so softly their lips were barely touching but it was special. They both knew it. They both also knew that their happiness wouldn't last forever.

"You know I've still got to go through with this wedding," he said miserably, stroking her hair comfortingly. She nodded not looking him in the eye. He lifted her chin up forcing her emerald orbs to gaze into his hazel eyes. "Let's not worry about that until we have to, flower, let's just go celebrate my birthday and be happy."

Lily smiled and placed his hand in front of her for him to take. He grabbed it lovingly and they both entered his lounge hand in hand. The others knew their love and they also knew the agony they were both going to have to go through but for now it didn't matter. They were having a party.

"I fully apologise for whatever Sirius may do to Aurora," said James sincerely yet his hazel eyes were dancing in amusement.

"She's a big girl I'm sure she can handle him," laughed Lily for a second before looking at James with a serious expression. "But you need to apologise to him."

James nodded gravely and made it over to where Sirius was spinning Aurora around to some random muggle music. She was shrieking with laughter until Sirius accidentally let go of her hand when he saw James. She went flying into the wall.

"Oops," muttered Sirius sheepishly before hurrying to where she was laying on the ground in a heap.

"I'm so sorry, are you alright?" he asked, biting his lip nervously.

She grinned up at him. "That was fun! Let's do it again."

He laughed. "You know what Rory? I'm started to really like you." He grabbed her hands and pulled her up easily, her long black her swishing side to side.

"Can I have a word Siri?" asked James ruefully. "It'll only take a moment Rory then he's all yours."

She nodded whilst rubbing her head. Sirius followed James into his bedroom.

"I'm so sorry Padfoot," said James sadly. "I didn't mean to hit you, well, in that split second I did but I regretted it the second after."

"I know," smiled Sirius. "You my best friend James, my brother even. Of course I forgive you but just think about what you're doing here. If you'd have never have taken this job, you'd have never have found Lily again, you'd still be happy with Gwen."

"You know I wouldn't be happy with her," admitted James, sinking into his bed, running a hand through his messy tresses. "Our relationship was cracking long before Lily came along. We're too different. She's happy with money and fame; I'm happy with friends and family. She doesn't even like my best friends! The moment, I saw Lily; I knew that I had to break up with Gwen. I've never loved anyone as much as I've loved Lily. You were at Hogwarts with me you know that. Whenever I imagine my future I picture Lily. I always have. But then Gwen got pregnant.

Most fathers-to-be are ecstatic when they find out but when she told me I thought she was playing a sick joke on me. I was waiting for someone to jump out and tell me it was all a prank and that makes me sick. It isn't the baby's fault. The funny thing is, is that I've always wanted children. A beautiful baby boy with messy black hair like me and Lily's emerald eyes."

"You have one complicated life, mate," commented Sirius. "But it will get better. Sure it might not be the way you've planned but you've still got friends, family and you've still got Gwen. In a few months time you'll have a gorgeous baby girl with messy black hair and dazzling blue eyes. She'll become the most important person in your life Prongs. I know you, you'll give her the best childhood a child can possibly have because I know despite all the feelings you have for her mother you will still love her no matter what."

James smiled. "You're one of the smartest people I know Sirius although I know many would disagree. Thanks. You've put a lot of things in perspective for me but I'm not married until August and I deserve those few months with Lily. When that time comes though I'll pull through cause of the baby."

"But for now let's get wasted and have a good time!"


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter Twenty Seven

James rolled over in his bed trying to escape the penetrating rays of sunshine that would force him to awake from his slumber. The sharp tug of his curtains had woken him up but he didn't want to open his eyes. His head felt too heavy to move from all the alcohol he had consumed the previous night. Never again, he thought pensively, although he knew he was lying.

"James," said a soothing voice in his ear. "Come on, honey wake up, it's your birthday."

His first thoughts were that it was Lily waking him up but the voice was slightly deeper and less of a tinkle to it. It was his mother's warm voice instead.

He opened his eyes and squinted as his eyes became accustomed to the brightness.

"Morning mother," he croaked, before coughing to regain his voice. He pulled himself to a sitting position, discreetly looking at the other side of the bed to check if Lily was still lying there. She wasn't. At least that would prevent any awkward questions. "Hi dad."

"Happy Birthday James," smiled Lou, fondly.

"So how does it feel being twenty four?" asked his father, smirking.

"I feel a whole day older than yesterday," grinned James, sarcastically. "Nah it's same I'm just going to worry when I turn thirty."

Harry laughed. "My thirties were the best time of my life, son."

"Is that because it was life before little old me?" chuckled James.

"Nonsense, darling," said Lou with a tut. "You were the best thing that ever happened to us."

"That's her opinion," muttered Harry.

"Hey!"

"All I'm saying is that you were a bit of a handful," said Harry, his hands up in defence, his eyes twinkling with laughter." 

"James you've ran out of-" called out Lily, walking in from his connecting bathroom, with only a white fluffy towel wrapped around her. "Oh."

James eyes widened and he smiled sheepishly at Lily, who was blushing red, as he could feel his parent's eyes in the side of his head.

"Hiya Lily," smiled Harry, his eyes questioning James. "It's nice to see you."

"You too, Harry," replied Lily, several octaves higher than her usual voice. "Morning, Lou."

"Good morning Lily, what brings you here?"

"Just using James's shower," she answered nervously. "Well obviously. Anyways I better go to-"

"Happy Birthday James," cried out Sirius as he burst into room, completely ignorant of the extra people there. "I do hope you and Lily are decent after your very loud activities of sexual fun last night."

Lily's eyes widened, James gulped and his parents had shock splashed across their features. No one said a word, until Sirius finally found a reason for the domineering silence.

"Ohhhh oops," said Sirius, laughing sheepishly. "Well I'll just be off."

"Oh no you won't," growled James, has he practically leapt out of bed to pounce on him. Lily rushed in between them, as Sirius ran off. She had her hands on his bare shoulders, the towel staying up on its own, as he still tried to get past her.

"What did I tell you about hitting Sirius?" she asked, sternly.

"I'm not allowed to hit Sirius," said James, dejectedly like a little child who knew he'd been caught.

"Well don't hit him then!" exclaimed Lily, taking her hands off him, as she was satisfied he wouldn't hunt Sirius down. "What is it with boys and their fists?"

"I'm not sure."

"It was a rhetorical question, idiot," she sighed. "I'm going to get dressed before anyone else happens to pleasantly drop in."

He followed her with his hazel eyes as she walked out of the room, her head held high. Then, he turned around to face the wrath of his parents. James couldn't determine whether or not they were angry or disappointment; it was a disturbing mixture of the two.

"I thought I brought you up better than this, James," sighed, Lou. She was shaking her head; she couldn't even bear to see his face. "I'm going to go make breakfast for everybody. How many people are here?"

"You, me and dad, Sirius and Remus, Alice and Frank, Aurora," answered James, pausing for a second. "And Lily."

"I presumed Gwen wouldn't be here," his mother chided. "You may not be able to keep it in your pants but at least you're not stupid about it."

James looked away; too ashamed to reply. He heard her leave the room, the door shutting quietly behind her. His father sighed and James turned to see him sit down on his bead, sinking down into the soft mattress. Harry patted the patch of bed to the side of him, gesturing for James to sit. He grabbed a t-shirt that had been strewn across the floor and sat on the bed.

"You love her." It wasn't a question; the situation had gone past questioning.

"Yeah," sighed James, running a hand through his messy raven hair.

"And you're still marrying Gwen?"

"Yeah."

"Why, James?"

"Because she's carrying my child," proclaimed James. "You know that!"

"What if Lily became pregnant?" mused Harry. "Then you'd be in a bit of a predicament."

"That would be a predicament," he commented. "I'm careful with that, dad, it will never happen."

"I'm glad you are careful but just imagine that Lily was pregnant, what would you do?"

"I don't know, I'd marry her I suppose," answered James, bemused.

"There you go then!" said Harry, half smiling, half frowning. "If they were both in the same situation you would pick Lily so that doesn't mean you can't now."

"Are you telling me to get Lily knocked up so I've got a reason to leave Gwen?" he asked, extremely confused.

"No, of course not son," replied Harry, shaking his head. "My point is that if they were both the same, say Gwen wasn't pregnant, then you could happily be with Lily."

"That's obvious though," groaned James, putting his head in his hands. "In theory, I could leave Gwen, be with Lily and see my child but you know it's not that simple. If I wasn't a Potter and if I hadn't been a Quidditch player then maybe that would be possible. The way it is now though, the way my family will be hounded by the press I just can't do that. Being with Gwen is a safer and easier option."

"But it's not the happiest solution."

"Of course it isn't but c'est la vie and all that crap."

"You're being very strong, I'm proud, not necessarily by how you're handling the situation but by the fact that you are handling it."

"Well that's me, James Potter, the strong one," grinned James, sarcastically.

"Just promise me you won't hurt Lily too much."

"I'd nev-"

"I know you wouldn't intentionally," interrupted Harry. "But you're marrying someone else and it's going to hurt her at some point. She's a lovely, determined, spirited young woman and it's clear why you love her but I don't believe she's as strong as she makes out to be."

"I know," said James softly. "I'll do everything I can for her. What about mum though? She seemed really disappointed in me."

"Your mother and I have had our suspicions about this ever since Christmas," smiled Harry, reminiscing slightly. "You're different around her. You're freer in yourself."

"So when I go into the kitchen I'll smell the delicious aroma of pancakes and maple syrup?"

"Of course you will," laughed Harry. "Even just the thought of it is making my belly rumble. Come on, let's go eat, your birthday breakfast."

The kitchen was busy with laughter and general noises a kitchen should have. Alice, Frank, Sirius and Rory were sat on the high red stools; plates of pancakes stacked high. His mother was tended to some more pancakes, bustling around. Remus was sat on the couch with his legs sprawled across the coffee table flicking through the Daily Prophet. Lily sat opposite him, her feet curled beneath her body, avidly reading a book. She paused and looked up briefly and hazel met emerald as their eyes connected. He barely noted the fact that everybody else turned to look at him as he walked in.

He strode up towards her, bent down, cupped her face gently and pressed his lips to hers. He could feeling her smiling against his mouth.

"Everyone knows now," he said softly, a grin stretching across his face. "We don't have to be a secret."

"Unless we're at school or your fiancée is near by," pointed out Lily.

"But at this moment, right now, we're all that matters."

"Happy Birthday, James."

"I'm off to get a big plate of pancakes," smiled James, happily. "You want some?"

"No thanks," whispered Lily theatrically. "Don't tell your mother but I'm not really a pancake person."

James laughed. "Ok then. Has she said anything to you? You know about us."

Lily smiled softly. "She told me she wishes I was the bride-to-be."

James's heart nearly broke at the cruel realisation that because he was marrying Gwen, Lily would have to move on. One day she would be a bride-to-be and he wouldn't be the groom. It was strange really, ever since he was thirteen he wanted her to be his bride yet now they were together and they both loved each other, he was never going to watch her walk down the aisle towards him.

"I think most people do," he said, gently cupping her face, wishing that all his troubles could just disappear.

"Go get your pancakes I can practically hear your belly rumbling."

He laughed, gave her a quick peck on the lips and walked into the kitchen area smiling at his friends on the stools. His mother turned around to face him as she saw everyone waving and saying 'good morning'. He looked at her like a little lost, sad puppy. She smiled and opened her arms to embrace him. He hugged his mother warmly

"I'm sorry that I've let you down," said James truthfully.

His mother chuckled. "You haven't let me down because I knew this would happen. You've always loved her even when you were small and scrawny and she's always loved you even if she didn't quite realise. I just wish you two could be together in other circumstances. I know why you're marrying Gwen and I know why you're having an affair. Just please understand why it will have to end when you're married. I don't want to twinkle in your eyes to fade away."

James was about to reply when someone knocked loudly on his front door. He made to move to the door when Lily shouted, "I'll get it!" He turned back to his mother and smiled.

"My twinkle isn't going anywhere, mum," he assured. "After all, isn't it better to have loved and lost than never have loved at all?" He shuddered as he heard the door slam loudly.

"Only those who have never loved at all claim that, James," sighed Lou.

He opened his mouth to reply but a huge explosion came from his front door. Everyone screamed from shock and fear but there was one scream the loudest; Lily's. She'd been next to the front door, realised James terrified.

"Lily!" he exclaimed. He grabbed his wand from the kitchen counter; lucky he'd left it there last night really and ran over to what looked like a muggle bomb site. The door had been blown off its hinges, dust and debris everywhere including bits of ceiling that had fallen off with the force. He looked down to see Lily unconscious, in some man's arms. He couldn't see the man's face as it was bent down towards Lily, mumbling something.

"Let go of her," ordered James, his wand pointed sharply into the stranger's neck. He could feel Sirius, Remus, Frank and his father stood behind him too wands at the ready.

The man slowly looked up and both of their eyes widened.

"Snivellus," exclaimed Sirius.

"What are you doing here?" asked Snape viciously and confused.

"I live here," answered James. "You on the other hand have no right to be here. Why are you here? And why did you feel the need to blow up the door? What did my door ever do to you?"

He could hear Sirius and Remus chuckling behind him but no sound came from Snape so he dug the wand in harder.

"Come on Snape be nice it's my birthday," smirked James. "I don't like getting pissed off on my birthday I have a tendency to get very violent."

"I was looking for Lily," said Snape. "She slammed the door on me."

"Well I'll have to reward her for that," grinned James. "Do you think she'd prefer chocolates or just really good sex? Because I can supply her with both." He heard his mother gasp behind him but he knew this is what would aggravate Snape the most.

"W-w-what?" spluttered Snape. "You and her… you're engaged, you're lying." 

"Well you always said I was a no good womaniser."

"She wouldn't," sneered Snape. "She hates you. You cheated on her!"

"Oh believe me she would and she has," explained James, enjoying the power he had over him. "I only cheated on her because somebody spiked my drink."

"James," mumbled Lily, as she started coming back to consciousness.

"Lily it's me Sev," said Snape softly. "It's your best friend."

"Get off me!" she screeched, wriggling around trying to escape from his arms. He loosened his arms as the rejection shocked him. She crawled to James and he helped her up, gently moving her behind him. She however had other plans. She whipped out her wand and pointed it firmly at Snape. He managed to stand himself up and watched in disbelief as the wand pointed at him.

"You're not my best friend," she said darkly. "You lost the privilege the moment you became a Deatheater." 

"I did it for you!"

"When did I ever ask you to become evil?" exclaimed Lily, tears down her face.

"To show I was better than him," shouted Snape, pointing at James. James merely raised an eyebrow. "I was your best friend, always there for you and he was the annoying jerk who used to annoy and embarrass you yet you fell for him. How is that fair?"

"He didn't hang around with people who were plotting the death of all muggleborns," said Lily. "Why are you here?"

"Because I love you, I always have," said Snape. "I just thought I could prove it to you."

"Get out and leave me alone," ordered Lily, stonily. "This is my life now; you have no place in it."

"You heard what the lady said," smirked James. "I'd ask you to shut the door on the way out but obviously you've hindered that impossible. Off you go."

Snape sighed and glared at James menacingly but did exit the apartment dejectedly. Sirius and Remus and Frank started repairing the door as James out his arms around Lily comfortingly. He felt her collapse and shouted his mother over.

"The poor things drained out I suspect," commented Lou. James felt something warm and wet where his hand was on Lily's side. He looked at his hand to find it soaked in blood. He looked at his mother alarmed. She gently lifted up Lily's top and James almost collapsed himself. A huge chunk of wood had lodged itself in near her kidneys. It was deep and she was growing cold.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter Twenty Eight

"James, James," moaned Lily, her eyes focused on his. They looked misty and he couldn't help himself of being reminded of the ominous orbs from Divination. If he believed in that sort of stuff it would have scared him more. Luckily (or more likely unluckily) for him, that seemed impossible. "It hurts."

"I know," muttered James, stroking her hair that was now dusty from small pieces of debris. "It'll all be over soon I promise. My mum's going to make you as right as rain." She tried to smile but she started to cough. The colour in James's face drained as he saw blood trickle down the side of her mouth. Her eyes started flickering shut. "Please Lily, stay with me."

"James I need you to leave," said Lou as gently as she could manage.

"No I'm not leaving her side," argued James, his voice breaking and his eyes growing teary.

"You need to go now," ordered Lou. "Leave the apartment and don't come back until I send Remus to get you."

"How come he gets to stay?"

"Because I know he won't get too emotionally involved."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"He understands when you have to give up," said Lou quietly.

"No, Mum, don't you dare," shouted James. "Please. You know what she means to me."

His own mother could barely look at him and he didn't know what to do. His mum, the hero of the Healers didn't look hopeful. He felt a hand on his arm and turned to see Sirius staring at him solemnly.

"Come on," he urged gently, practically pulling James out of the apartment.

"Let me back in there," commanded James angrily.

"You know I can't."

"She could die," whispered James, sliding down the wall with his head in his hands. "She could die and I haven't had the chance to say things that I should have. The last kiss we had wasn't nearly as special enough."

"The last one is always special," said Sirius thoughtfully. "And don't think like that, mate, in a couple of hours you'll be able to say all the things you want to say and kiss her as much as want."

"What a great birthday this has turned out to be," sighed James miserably, tears trickling down his face. He shuddered as the salty water dribbled down onto his lips.

"You want to know a way to make it better?" smirked Sirius. James looked up ashen faced with no expression what so ever. He couldn't bring his face to move to be quite honest. "We get him back." 

"What?" asked James, croakily.

"Are you going to sit there moping or are you going to show Snivellus just how much you hate him right now?"

"We don't even know where he is."

"But we know plenty of people who could track him down," reckoned Sirius.

"Like who?"

"You know a lot of people at the Daily Prophet. I'm sure one of them would be willing to cooperate with us. All we need is his address."

He could tell by the look on Sirius's face that he wanted to hurt Snape just as much as he did. After all, Lily was a close friend of his too. It wasn't just him who would be hurt by her death. She had touched many hearts.

James thought very carefully. If he did find Snape who knew what would happen? He certainly wouldn't be responsible for his own actions. However he knew he would never be able to live if he was busy going after Snape and he wasn't there if Lily died. He was angry and he wanted revenge.

"Come on."

They both apparated into the apparation centre of the Daily Prophet headquarters. After gathering himself together he and Sirius started walking into the main building. James knew it was time to put on a façade. Reporters could smell out a lie and, if figured out, his situation would make a hell of a story: Quidditch Hero Breaks Down When Secret Lover Dies. The public loved a tragic sordid affair when famous people were involved.

"Which reporter should we go for?" asked Sirius. "The busty blonde?"

"Rita Skeeter? No way! I'm not having a nasty exposé written about me," exclaimed James, causing several people to look their way causing him to lower his voice significantly. "As soon as I ask her to dig up Snape's address I'll have some article written about how he's my long lost love or something equally as daft."

Sirius laughed. "She does seem to have a nasty streak about her. No matter how busty, she scares me anyways. It's the long red talons and the weird jewelled glasses. No matter how elaborately she curls her hair she isn't going to look pretty any time soon."

In any other circumstance James would have chuckled heartily but now he could barely find the energy to exist. It was as though his heart was splitting in two. He finally understood what the term 'heartbroken' felt like.

"We need Jacobs. He's a sports reporter so he won't be looking for a tawdry story," explained James. "I've had a drink with him one or two times. He's an alright bloke. He should give us what we need hopefully."

The pair walked over to the front desk and waited patiently in the queue.

"We're looking for a Lucas Jacobs," said James. "Tell him James Potter needs an urgent word with him."

"I'll send the Sport's Department secretary a memo right away Mr Potter," smiled the brunette secretary, flirtatiously. "Please take a seat whilst you wait."

"Thanks."

Sirius eyed her up as they sat down. When he caught her eye he winked enticingly. She smiled and blushed prettily.

"So how are we going to go about this?" asked Sirius, thoughtfully. "We're going to need a reason why we're after his address."

Decisions whirled around in his head. Even though he could trust Jacobs he also knew he was a reporter. If he knew the truth it was front page worthy which would mean a huge bonus for Jacobs. Money and good stories were of huge importance in the world of media; it was a dog eat dog and James was fully aware of it.

"We tell him the truth," stated James, with his eye on the secretary as a pink memo fluttered through the doors and onto his desk. "I have something that will make him want to keep quiet though."

"Mr Potter," called out the secretary. "Mr Jacobs is ready to see you now. He's on the fourth floor."

They muttered their thanks and went into the lift. They kept themselves to themselves as other witches and wizards glanced at the curiously. James looked down towards the floor, worried they could read his emotions as easy as they read this trashy newspaper. To be honest, his actions were just as trashy if not more. If people knew what he had been doing the past few months a tide of national hatred would hit him with such an unnatural force. Sirius had pressed the button for the fourth floor and they waited patiently in an awkward silence until the ping of lift sounded.

The sports floor had an uplifting atmosphere. Perhaps it was because it held reminders of an easier time when winning a Quidditch match were all he had to worry about. There was an office at the other end of the floor which was no doubt the sport's editor's office. There were no other offices and reporters worked in fairly spacious cubicles. They walked down the aisle in the middle not stopping until they reached the very last cubicle: Lucas Jacobs, Head Sports Reporter. James looked down to see a head of spiky dark blonde hair which slowly looked up to reveal a cheeky face with what looked like a broken nose.

"Your nose looks a bit wonky since the last time I saw you," pointed out James.

"Well you know what those angsty Quidditch players are like," smirked Jacobs. "What are you wanting Potter? The secretary said it was urgent."

"We need an address," said Sirius. "And we'd prefer it a little hush hush if you know what I mean." Jacobs face turned serious, as he led them to the side of the room were they were less nosy ears listening in.

"We can reveal information like that but you know fully well it goes down on record," he muttered inconspicuously. "I'll need a pretty damn good reason for me to break the rules."

"Please get us the address and you'll get more than a reason," promised James.

"I don't take bribes James," said Lucas softly. "I'm merely curious."

"It's not a bribe it's more of a thank you gift."

"We'll take the stairs down to the basement," instructed Lucas. "It's where all the records and information is kept."

After they reached the dim lighted basement Lucas locked the door behind them for the strictest privacy.

"Won't somebody want to come down here?" asked Sirius.

"No, it's past lunch time most people have already done their research for their stories. I'm going to need a name."

"Severus Snape," said James darkly, a surge of anger and hatred rushed through him.

They waited as Lucas searched through a tall cabinet marked 'S'. It was clearly much unorganised leading to a long pause in the action as the searching went on. Finally James exhaled as he pulled out a yellowing folder out of middle draw.

"Interesting," mused Lucas. 

"What?"

"According to this Snape was asking for information himself just last week," he explained, whilst grabbing a piece of parchment and taking an ever handy inkless quill out of his back pocket as he scribbled down the details they wanted. "It says he wanted the address of a Miss Lily Evans." James visibly paled and the reporter didn't fail to notice. "I presume he found her."

"Not at her address," said Sirius bemused. "At his."

"It doesn't say anything about your address."

"We should check her apartment out," suggested Sirius. "Could we have her address as well please?"

"Yeah, sure, but I'd like to know what's going on."

"He's a suspected Deatheater and he blew up my front door when she wouldn't let him in," informed James, in a voice he barely recognised. "They argued, he told her he loved her and she wouldn't have any of it. When he left we discovered part of my front door is now embedded in her and she's dying; bleeding to death. We want revenge." Lucas nodded not even bothered by the almost fictional sounding explanation. He dealt with ludicrous stories every day.

"That's not everything is it?"

"I love her. I've been seeing her for months and yes I know I have a pregnant fiancée. I'm fully aware that if I said that loudly enough one of the reporters upstairs would gladly tear my life apart and shout it out to the world from the front page." James couldn't look him in the eye. Not because he was ashamed but just because he couldn't bear it if Lucas had the nearly maniac glint in his eyes. He didn't want a friend to sell him out.

"Wow, the rich and famous really do have it all," commented Lucas. "Well apart from the bleeding to death thing, which I wouldn't wish on anybody. Here are your addresses and your requests have gone completely under the radar."

"Now I can tell you what you get in return," said James solemnly. "How would you like to do an exclusive on my wedding day? I know you're a sport's writer but it's going to be big news."

"Your fiancée is a model for Witch Weekly surely they'll be reporters from there present at the wedding."

"There will be but they've been made to sign legal contracts making them agree not to publish anything about our much _loved _day."

"That's more than a thank you," smiled Lucas. "Don't forget to send me an invitation." He has unlocked the door and James and Sirius had began to ascend the stairs. "And James?"

"Yeah?"

"Just don't go crazy," warned Lucas. "Ex Quidditch player beating the crap out of Deatheater will sell stories. Make sure anybody who'd write them will never find out."


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter Twenty Nine

Chapter Twenty Nine

The apartment building was not dissimilar from his apartment building. Apart from the fact hers was muggle it and his was for magical beings only he could have got them confused. The hallways even had the same boring cream walls as his. They stood in front of her door, slightly unsure what to do. It would be rude to let them in but then again it wasn't as though she was waiting in there to let her in. They didn't have to decide as an elderly woman entered the hallway from the apartment next door. She had an odd scent of cats and mint imperials and she dressed in layers of woollen shawls and a long simple dress. His heart when out for her as she gave out the impression of living alone.

"Are you looking for Lily?" she asked, with a kind smile.

"Not exactly," answered James politely. "We were just wondering whether you knew if anyone else came to see her."

"A young man like you came to visit her yesterday in fact. Unlike you he was rather rude and he looked like is hair could do with a bloody good wash," said the old woman, as Sirius chuckled. "I'm Betty Cullen, her next door neighbour. She asks me to look after her apartment from time to time. She teaches at a boarding school in Scotland so she isn't around much to take care of it yet she is adamant not to rent it out or sell it. She's such a lovely young girl; whenever she's at home she always makes me a nice cup of tea so we can have a good chit chat." James smiled fondly: that was definitely his Lily, caring and sweet. "I was just off to do the weekly dusting and plant watering now, if you'd like to join me for a cuppa."

"We'd love to," grinned Sirius. "So the visitor yesterday, what did he want?"

"He was asking where she was and I told him she was staying at a friend's for the Easter Holidays," answered Betty as she searched for the right key as around ten jingled on simple silver coloured key ring. "He was adamant to see her so I gave him an address she asked me to give if someone came looking for her."

Why did Lily have to be so organised? Snape would never have found her without that address. She would be spending his birthday with him happily.

"Did he say why he wanted to see her?" asked Sirius, knowing that James was far too much in thought.

"Not really," said Betty dismissively, not understanding the seriousness of the matter. "He just said it was urgent. Is there something wrong with her? Is she ok?" She finally opened the door and the three of them were stunned to see the state of Lily's apartment. Books were thrown off shelves, pottery smashed, furniture turned over, curtains slashed, papers all over the floor, drawers pulled out from desks and that was only the lounge. It was a disaster area

"No she's not," said James sadly. "Now she's definitely not. Sirius, could you just look in the other rooms?" His friend nodded and scampered off through a door.

"I didn't know he'd come into the apartment," said Betty, in shock. "I don't even know how he could. The door was locked." James knew; magic.

"Do you have family elsewhere, Mrs Cullen?" asked James seriously.

"My daughter, she lives up in Yorkshire," she replied, scared.

"Right, I need you to go stay with her for a few weeks," advised James. "You're better off living away from here. Just as a precaution."

"Do you think they (who ever they are) would do this to me?" asked the frightened old woman.

"Probably not but I'd rather be safe than sorry," said James. "You're the link; the one who knows where she is. If whoever did this came back I wouldn't want you to be anywhere near them."

"I'll go phone my daughter now," announced Betty. "She'll drive down immediately. I should pack as well."

"I wish we could wait with you, Betty," said James, with a slight smile. "But we really should get back to Lily."

"You go to her as soon as you can," she smiled. "You obviously care for her a lot." He watched as she left the apartment quickly and Sirius came back.

"The whole apartment is like this, mate," said Sirius sensitively. "What do we do now?"

"We go find Snape," said James seriously.

The pair apparated near a river away from peering muggles' eyes. The water was dirty and litter was scattered around the small bank of which they began to walk up. James looked around his surroundings and a small part of him felt sorry for Snape. The place felt dirty and even though the sun was shining down it felt dreary. The immense chimney of a disused mill loomed down on them ominously. They both climbed over the shoddy metal railings that separated the bank from the narrow cobbled street. He looked across at the rows of dilapidated brick houses; their windows dull and empty.

A few children were playing in the street, free from school for a good week or two. James tried avoiding eye contact with them; they must look strange to them as they'd just suddenly came up the bank. He and Sirius continued to walk past the first row of houses through an alley to the second. James walked up steadily to the one he knew to be Snape's and calmly rang the door bell, Sirius by his side.

In any other situation James would have laughed at Snape's facial expression as he opened his front door. Shocked at first with a splash of annoyance and then slowly turned to defiance, nervous defiance.

"What do you want, Potter?" Snape spat venomously.

"You visited my humble abode so we thought it was high time we visited yours," smirked James. As he pushed past Snape and entered his lounge, sitting leisurely on one of the armchairs, whilst raising an eyebrow at all the books.

"What do you think you're doing?" fumed Snape, angrily. With him with his feet up, Sirius stood by the door, it left Snape stood in the middle of the room unsure of what to do.

"I wouldn't ask him that if I were you, Snivellus," warned Sirius, threateningly. "Thanks to you, he's not in the best of moods."

"What do I care what mood he's in?"

"Would you care if I told you, that thanks to you, Lily is in my lounge possibly dying or even dead already?" asked James, quietly, anger quickly bubbling up inside of him.

"W-w-what?" stammered Snape, stumbling backwards slightly. "You're lying."

"Nope when you blasted my door down you blasted a chunk of wood into her side," snapped James.

"But she was talking, she was fine," argued Snape, not believing what he was hearing.

"Adrenaline," stated James. "Seeing you it made her angry, it got her pulses and adrenaline racing. She probably didn't feel her could be fatal injury. You left and the adrenaline was replaced with pain. Most likely unbearable pain. Thanks to you."

"She was never meant to be hurt," said Snape quietly. "It was just supposed to look like I scared her."

"It was you who destroyed her apartment," said Sirius, it was not a question, yet Snape nodded in answer anyway. "What was the real reason you came to see her?"

"To tell her that I love her."

"Then why bother breaking into her apartment?" glared James. "Why bother come at all? Surely you knew it was a lost cause."

"He ordered me to," he replied shakily. No one needed to ask who He was. "He wants me to scare you. Scaring her or hurting her gets to you. I didn't know she was staying with you though. I just thought it would get to you by friends and stuff."

James angrily jumped up from the chair and slammed Snape up against the wall so hard, several books fell to the floor. With one hand around Snape's neck, the other jabbed his wand into his head through Snape's greasy mat of hair.

"She is dying thanks to you," shouted James. "Just because you're 'master' ordered you to you hurt the one you supposedly love. You obviously don't care that much at all. Well, I do care, and if she does die then I'll be back and she won't be the only one going through the so called light."

He let go of him and turned around before turning back sharply and punching Snape in the face. It wasn't necessary but it gave him satisfaction. He inspected his hand; grazed knuckles. They stung but he was better off than Snape. He was kneeling on the floor clutching his quickly swollen face. James looked away ashamed. Doing childish jinxes on him when they were at school was one thing but actual bodily harm was completely different. He had never liked physical fighting, even wizard duels seemed barbaric to him as he grew older but he couldn't deny he got a sense of pleasure from that one punch. He realised he only ever threw about his fists when Lily was involved. It felt like a life time ago and yet it was only last night. Besides he wasn't punching properly; no matter how angry he could never punch his best friend as hard as he could.

He looked around the tiny enclosed room. The walls were completely covered in books, including the back of the door. Apart from the room only contained one thread bare sofa, an old armchair and a rickety old table all under the dark light of the candle filled lamp hanging from the ceiling. James's bathroom was bigger than this. For the first time, James held more pity for Snape than hatred. Yet he kept it concealed because knowing you were pitied was what often broke a person down.

"Let's go," whispered James.

He was too scared to enter his own apartment. Who knew what was in there; his Lily or a corpse? He was being crazy, he was a Gryffindor. He could be brave enough to open a door. He was thankful that his friend understood him and was waiting patiently in the hallway with him.

"You don't have to go in yet, you know," said Sirius, as they both stared at the door expressionless.

"I know but if I don't I'll regret it," said James, a tear rolling down his cheek. "What if right now I'm missing her last moments and I was just on the other side of the door?"

"You can't lead a life of 'what ifs' you'll end up going crazy."

"I think I already have," said James, with a bitter chuckle. "It's a door. A simple door and yet it seems so much."

"If it's a simple door then open it," urged Sirius. James slowly put his hand around the door handle keeping his hand there for a few seconds before he opened the door at a snail's pace.

At first the difference between lives hit him, his apartment seemed so spacious and bright compared to the small dingy lounge he had just been in. Everything was quiet which he often perceived to be a bad sign. He was scared, he wouldn't deny it, but Sirius was with him every step of the way. Tears trickled down his face but he didn't care.

He saw his mother and father, and Remus and Frank sitting on his kitchen stools sipping quietly from their mugs. They all turned to stare at him sympathetically. He looked away from them towards the fireplace to see Aurora and Alice huddled together on the black leather sofa looking mournful.

"No it can't be," he heard Sirius whisper sadly, before he collapsed to the floor sobbing. He couldn't breathe properly, his vision seemed to go blurry, his ears buzzed, he was losing all strings of thought until someone gave him a sharp slap to the face bringing him back to the land of fully consciousness.

"She's not dead, James," he heard as he felt his mother's soothing hands rub his back in a circular movement as his sobs subsided.

"Where is she?" he asked, his voice sounded so small and fragile.

"You're father put her in your room," replied his mother with a smile. "She's sleeping, I made her drink a sleeping potion so she can sleep until the pain goes away. She lost a lot of blood but I made your father go home to my stock cupboards and I've been injecting blood replenishing potion to her system every hour which will need to be done for until she wakes up which she will when the extreme pains are over. She'll probably have a dull ache for the next week or so as well. Also, they might be scarring." James nodded taking it all in silently; all the while thanking Merlin that she was alive. He was just about to ask his mum whether he could go see her when a familiar high pitch voice from the door way startled him.

"Happy Birthday Gorgeous!"

Gwen was back.


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty

Chapter Thirty

"W-What are you doing back?" asked James shakily, wiping his tears away with the back of his hand, standing up. "I thought you were in Milan."

"I was but do you really think I'd miss your birthday, silly," she giggled, with that sickly sweet voice that he once thought he loved. Was it still his birthday? The morning seemed so long ago. "It's a good job your friends and family are already here."

"Why?" asked James bemused.

"You really are being a silly this morning aren't you," she smiled giving him a quick kiss on the lips. "For the joint birthday party/baby shower. People will be arriving in an hour."

"What?" exclaimed Lou, in shock. "You could have given us a little bit more notice, Gwen."

"Well, Mrs Potter, there was no need because I had my assistant arrange it all," said Gwen, briskly. "I've invited your old team mates as well, because I know you haven't seen them in ages. And my friends of course. Surprise!"

If it was any other time or from any other person James would be ecstatic about the 'surprise'. Gwen though, she infuriated him and yet he knew she didn't though. She didn't know he was in love with another woman. She didn't know that other woman was sleeping on his bed.

"Is there any way you can arrange it for another day? Next week perhaps," asked James, as nicely as he could. She looked taken a back and actually hurt by what he said.

"I-I thought I'd done something nice for you," muttered Gwen. "I know I haven't been the best girlfriend in a while and I'm not blaming the fact I'm pregnant but it is a factor. I started to resent you for it. I didn't want to be pregnant at this time in my life; I'm a model for Merlin's sakes! But now I've come to understand that this baby is a blessing for both of us. I just wanted to make it up to you."

James noticed everybody else look away in shame. He was disgusted with himself. No matter what he felt for Lily, Gwen still loved him. She didn't know what had happened. She didn't know about his affair. She was just trying her hardest at being a good girlfriend- a good fiancée even.

"I'm sorry Gwen," he said with a genuine apologetic smile. "It's just been a very stressful morning."

"It's ok," she smiled back, taking his hands in hers. "I should have checked with your parents or you first. I'm sorry but people are coming in an hour maybe even earlier I can't tell them not to come now."

"That's fine," said James reassuringly, to himself more than anyone else. "But we have no booze in the fridge and the place isn't decorat-"

"Sshhh. Like I said, my assistant has got everything arranged. I planned it all myself though but my parents didn't want to risk hurting the baby with the added stress of making sure it all goes to together," explained Gwen. "Jenny, my assistant will be here in about ten minutes to set up everything."

"OK sounds like you've got everything under control," said James. "I'll be right back there's… something I need to check on. You can catch up with everybody and I'm not sure if you've met Aurora before but I'm sure you'll like each other." He flashed a warning smile at Rory which clearly read, 'I know you won't get on with her but for the love of Merlin try your hardest."

"Ok darling, but hurry back I have an announcement to make."

James briefly nodded. It was probably about the baby or something as tedious as a new hairstyle. He walked into his bedroom, nervous about what awaited him. He pushed open the door gently and sat down on the edge of his bed.

She looked as though she was just sleeping peacefully, her red hair sprawled across his pillow yet he knew he wouldn't be able to wake her up if he tried. Her skin had regained its creamy colour no longer that transparent white that had scared him so much earlier today. He pulled down the quilt to her waist and slowly lifted up her top to see a four inch gash a couple of inches above her pelvic bone. He kissed smothered it in little kisses, tears falling down his face.

Memories of the Christmas Ball flooded back to him. This was the second time she was close to death because of him. She was in danger because of him. He couldn't bear it. He stroked her hair and face wishing in someway that they had never met again. She was innocent and him being near her was tainting her. Not only was she a target he had turned her into a mistress. She deserved to be treated so much better and he knew his friends thought that too. They all thought they were perfect together of course but frankly that situation was dirty.

"James, are you ok?" his mother's voice asked from the doorway.

"Yeah I'm fine," smiled James sadly. "I just wished she was."

"She'll pull through," said Lou, warmly. "Maybe not today maybe not tomorrow but it will happen soon."

"You're the only person I believe about stuff like that," said James sincerely, then he added as an after thought. "And her."

"You can always believe that in some parallel world that there is a James Potter happily married to a now Lily Potter," offered Lou, looking down at Lily's serene face like James.

"Why can't it be in this world though, Mum?" exclaimed James. "Why does everything go wrong here?"

"Just because you're upset you're forgetting all the good things in this world, James, you're losing sight. Lily might have got hurt on a few occasions but the good thing is that she's always pulled through. So you have to get married to a woman I know you don't love with all your heart, at least you got the chance to reconnect with the woman you've chosen as you're soul mate. Some people never even get the chance of meeting theirs once let alone twice."

James looked up at his mother confused. "What do you mean 'the woman you've chosen to be your soul mate'? I've always thought soul mates were a predestined thing."

"To some extent they are predestined but really it's through our actions and our heart that we chose them," smiled Lou.

"That's a really nice sentiment," James admitted with a small smile gracing his face as he looked down at Lily. "But how have my actions made her my soul mate? I've been horrible to her. I'm stringing her along as far as I can until the day I'm going to have to cut the strings and then she's going to fall."

"She knows what she's letting herself in for, James," said Lou, forcibly, determined for him to understand. "She's hanging herself on that string waiting for you to cut it because when you do she's free. She can move on just like she managed to when you first broke up. She'll probably go back to Healing, something you're not related to and she'll be in exactly the same position she was before you saw her again."

"I should have cut her off a long time ago though," laughed James bitterly. "But I've always yearned for things I can't really have and I've always been greedy enough to go back for more. Oh well, it's too late to change things now. I'm responsible for her and Gwen."

"Speaking of Gwen," his mother said quickly, wanting to change the topic for her son's sake. "She wanted me to get you. She wants to make her announcement soon."

"I'd have thought she'd have wanted to make the announcement when all the guests are here."

"I really do think she means what she says about being a trying to be a better fiancée," said Lou, honestly.

"I know," sighed James. "I just think I should try a little harder too."

"Right, go now," ordered Lou. "I'll be in the lounge in a minute. I just need to give her another injection."

"Does Gwen know Lily's in here?" asked James worriedly.

"No I didn't think it would be wise to mention it."

James nodded and left the room with one last longing glance at Lily's sleeping form.

The lounge had completely changed. His couches had been pushed against the wall, his kitchen table was stacked high with booze and snacks. Balloons floated above his ceiling; some saying 'Happy 23rd Birthday and others saying 'It's a girl!'. His friends were scattered around the room. Remus and his father looked fully engaged in some thrilling conversation, Alice and Frank were chatting happily together, Jenny the assistant was scurrying around aimlessly and Sirius and Rory were talking to Gwen not particularly enthusiastically. James was amused and intrigued to see Sirius's arm wrapped lazily around Rory's waist.

"James, darling," exclaimed Gwen, a huge smile gracing her face. "I'll wait for your mother to come back and then I will make my announcement." A minute went by and his mother entered with an encouraging wink for James. He smiled back knowing his mother was someone in his life he could count on. "Right, if I could have everybody's attention please."

Everybody piled into the lounge area; sitting themselves down on the couches or on plush cushions on the floor. Excluding James, he wanted to stand.

"As you all know that I'm four months pregnant and getting bigger everyday," said Gwen with a tinkered laugh. "We originally planned to have the wedding in the summer after the baby was born but there's simply no way I could lose all my baby weight by then. So I've decided I'd rather look pregnant on my wedding photos and not fat."

James knew what she was going to say; he just wished with all his might for once he had predicted wrongly.

"I've moved the wedding forward."

Merlin really had it in for him, thought James.

"To April."

"What the fuck?"

"Sirius!" exclaimed Lou, slapping his knee.

"Sorry," he muttered sheepishly. "But April? That's like -"

"- A month away," James finished off for him, taking in a deep breath. He turned to Gwen, his hazel eyes appearing many years older than what he actually was. "I'm still teaching in April. I thought I told you I won't abandon my students."

"Which is why the wedding will take place at Hogwarts," smiled Gwen.

He was taken aback that's for sure. He'd always pictured his wedding to take place at Hogwarts; of course he'd always pictured a different bride. Hogwarts was a special place for him and the fact that Gwen was even inspired enough to think of having the wedding there really touched him. It was just so soon. April was less than two weeks away. He had a minimum of ten days left with Lily; unconscious or not. It seemed so unreal. Everything was happening so fast. In ten days he could be an unhappily married man with a baby on the way. In ten days his whole life could be changed forever.

"What do you think?" asked Gwen, somewhat shyly for the usually straight forward blonde. "I know it's fast but everything's arranged and Dumbledore loves the idea. He said we can have it outside and he'd even organise the food and drinks. His only request is that the students can come to the after party. We could set up a big marquee on the lawn."

He looked at Gwen; stared at her intensely. Her bleach blonde hair was fake and repulsive yet her blue eyes seemed innocent and childlike even. She was just a little girl yearning for acceptance. It was had for her. None of James's friends or family had really make her feel welcome. She was trying to do something to make him happy; finally thinking about someone other than herself.

"I think that a wedding at Hogwarts would be perfect," smiled James, hugging Gwen, inhaling her now foreign scent. His eyes staring beyond her, at the door he knew Lily lay behind.

A wedding at Hogwarts would be perfect, thought James sadly, it's just a shame I'm not thinking about the same wedding.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter Thirty One

James leant against his kitchen counter, glass of butterbeer in hand, surveying the room. As far as he could tell, everybody was having fun. Apart from himself that was. He was used to parties where he'd have to smile and pretend like he was having a good time. He was good at doing that. He was just finding it excruciatingly difficult doing all that whilst Lily was sleeping with horrific injuries just down the hallway. So close...

"Hey James," said a thick, male voice from the side of him. He looked to see it Tony Skuller, his ex team mate, one of the finest beaters he had ever seen. He was several inches shorter than James's tall height but he was very broad shouldered, and built like a rock compared to James's leaner muscular athletic build.

"Hi Tony," smiled James genuinely. "How are you doing? How's your wife?"

"I'm doing ok but you'd have to ask Karen yourself," sighed Tony. "We just got divorced."

"I'm so sorry," sympathised James. "I didn't know."

"I figured," laughed Tony. "But don't let me put you off marriage."

"Don't worry everybody knows why I'm getting married and that's not going to change any time soon really," said James.

"You're only getting married because of the baby?" asked Tony, surprised. "It won't last."

"I would have proposed at some point," replied James earnestly, just not necessarily about the same woman. "The pregnancy just brought everything sooner."

"I suppose it's the honourable thing and all," smiled Tony, taking a swig of his firewhiskey. "Congratulations by the way. You're a good man, James."

"Thanks," said James, joining Tony in having a drink. "How's the new chaser holding out?"

"He's young and cocky; a lot like you," smirked Tony. "He doesn't have the natural talent and ability like you though. He needs more practise."

"He'll be fine I reckon, just persevere with him."

"We're all hoping you're going to come back in the summer and we won't have to persevere," admitted Tony.

"I don't know, I love Quidditch, you know I do," sighed James, rubbing his forehead. "But I think I've already moved on from it. It will always be a part of my life but I have so many other things as well going on right now."

"I suppose having two women must keep you occupied enough without Quidditch as well," grinned Tony.

"I only have Gwen," stated James quickly, confused. "I'm not quite following what you're trying to say."

"The redheaded girl," said Tony, making James nervous slightly. "Lily wasn't it?"

"Yeah Lily," answered James bemused. "But she's only a colleague and a friend."

"I know but when you're teaching surely she's like a girlfriend," reasoned Tony, thinking hard about how he was wording what he was saying. "She's your best friend there, so you're always going to be with her; like a girlfriend. It's just a shame she isn't actually your girlfriend because, no offense, she's hot."

"Following your logic I must have been gay at one point because I spend so much time with Remus and Sirius," pointed out James.

"I was only trying to say she seems a big part of your life."

"She's probably the one of the biggest, time wise," divulged James. "My thirteen year old self was madly in love with her after all."

"You've probably been through it all with her," smiled Tony.

"Yeah I have," said James, with a reminiscent smile. "She's a really good friend."

"Is she a single friend?" asked Tony sheepishly. "I thought you were the best person to ask after all. You know for permission and all."

James stared at him blankly for a couple of moments. He had never even thought of this situation before. To everybody else, Lily was a single woman but to him she was taken. He wanted her to stay his forever even though he knew they were selfish thoughts. Why couldn't she be happy as well? He looked properly at Tony; he was rich with lots of future career prospects when he retired from Quidditch, fairly good looking, and James knew he was a nice guy who would treat Lily with respect. He didn't want her near him though.

"She's single," said James reluctantly. "But to be honest mate, I wouldn't bother trying. She's really ill at the moment. That's why she's not here. Besides she's kind of hung up on this guy so I don't think she could handle a relationship just yet."

"Oh well, thanks anyways," grinned Tony. "It was worth a shot."

"Present Time!" called out Gwen's shrill voice. "Come on James, come sit yourself next to me."

James tried his hardest to make his smile appear natural and easy but he presumed it looked painful and fake. Not that Gwen or her blonde highlighted friends noticed. Sirius shot him a sympathetic smile as the couch heaved under his weight.

"We'll open a baby present first," said Gwen excitedly, her cheeks flushed. "Just because I've been dying to ever since the guests arrived."

"Yeah sure, I don't mind," replied James with a polite smile, barely seconds before bright pink, shiny wrapping paper had been dumped in his lap in tatters. He looked to Gwen's hands to see a pair of baby shoes: the colour surprise, surprise; pink. He barely heard the 'Awwws' from around him. The shoes made him smile and a warm feeling spread throughout his body. They were so small. He couldn't believe that in a few short months they would be on the tiny feet of his daughter. Gwen brought him out of his warm felt thoughts as she handed him a small velvet black box. He presumed it was his present from her so he gave her a smile of thanks.

He lifted the lid off and he felt his heart smile inside. It was a silver pocket watch with a beautiful inscription on it, _"There is only one thing that lasts longer than time, and that is true love,". _He couldn't be certain but he was sure it was from Lily. It was with her he was running out of time with and she knew it too.

"Aww Gwen, it's gorgeous," squealed one of her model friends, he had a vague recollection of her from other parties. Nicola; she might have been called. "Where ever did you find such an exquisite antique?"

"I didn't," seethed Gwen, with a hollow laugh. James knew she wanted to shout and scream but she was trying to keep her cool in front of all the guests. He opened the pocket watch as slyly as he could without her noticing but she grabbed it off him before he could look at it. "How sweet."

She glared at him as she gave the pocket watch back with an angry force. Why did he have to open Lily's present in front of the guests? Nobody needed to see him and Gwen arguing. The painful silences, not knowing what to do whilst a couple argued in front of you, it was horrible especially having to pretend you hadn't heard them when they've either made up or one of them storms off. He glanced at the open pocket watch; '_With Love, Lily,'_.

"James," called out Remus, from near the hallway door, with an apprehensive tone. "There's someone who wants to see you."

James looked up to see Remus supporting Lily up, she was practically having the cling on to him. She was wearing an old Quidditch jersey of his that went down to her knees. In any other situation he'd find that alarmingly attractive but he would have to be a sick man to think that now. She was startlingly pale, transparently white and pasty. She looked dazed and weak as she would collapse at any moment.

"James," rasped out Lily, with laboured deep breaths. James noticed everybody's eyes on her with shock and confusion.

"We'll finish opening the presents another time, please go back to party," announced James, standing up.

"We'll take this to your room," said Lou softly.

"I'm coming too," said Gwen icily. "I want to know what the hell is going on, James."

"Please Gwen, go back to your friends and have a good time," pleaded James. "This doesn't concern you."

"If your little girlfriend has been hiding out in supposedly our bedroom then it does concern me."

"She's not my girlfriend, you know that," sighed James. "Can't you see how bad she looks? She's seriously ill; touch and go kind of ill. She was attacked by a deatheater. That's why she's here because this apartment is protected more than hers."

"Here's your pocket watch. It fell to floor when you stood up," said Gwen, dismissively, handing him the silver watch before stalking off to go talk to her friends.

"Bloody hell mate," exclaimed Tony. "When you said she was really ill I didn't think you meant that ill."

"Deathly," said James with a sad frown.

"I hope she gets better," said Tony with a poignant smile. "She's such a nice girl."

"Me too, Tony, me too," whispered James.

"Hey," smiled James, his voice cracking ever so slightly, as he leant against the doorway. He'd been watching her for a few moments beforehand, as she lay looking small in his big king size bed. His mother sat dutifully in the chair beside her talking quietly to her about things he couldn't hear. He'd walked past Rory, Alice, Frank, Remus and Sirius in the hallway already, their smiles enthusiastic. His father had stayed in the lounge answering questions about the non expectant arrival of the sick girl who was 'apparently' a charge of his mothers.

Lily looked up at him, her face deathly white but with a huge smile. He watched as she tried to stand up and walk to him. She was stumbling, and clutching her side in pain so he strode up to her quickly and held her steady just as she collapsed.

"I've got you," breathed James, putting his arms under her knees, deftly picking her up and carrying her back to the bed where he gingerly laid her down. He sat on the bed at her side, his warm hand holding her cold one. "You gave me quite a scare today, Lily, please don't ever again."

"I'm sorry," said Lily, her voice sounding a lot better, no doubt his mother had supplied her with a throat potion.

"Don't you dare apologise," said James bitterly. "It's that bastard Snape's fault. Don't worry though; he got what was coming to him.

"I hope you didn't do something stupid," said Lily alarmed. "I don't want you hurt."

"Don't worry, my darling, I can look after myself," smiled James. "You on the other hand are determined to give me a heart attack."

"It hurt so much," cried Lily, tears running down her face. "I thought I was dying and I would never see you again."

"Aww, come here, flower," hushed James, snuggling up to her and holding her close. "We need to forget about that now. The fact that you're still here with me is all that matters. I love you so much."

"I love you too," said Lily with a tearful smile. James brushed her last tears away with him thumb. "I know that we only have until the summer but today has made me realised that life has got to be lived to the full so we are going to treasure the couple of months we have left."

James's smile faulted and he knew he had to tell her but he didn't want to. She had been through so much today and now he was about to break her heart. She suddenly looked confused as her emerald eyes stared piercingly into his hazel ones.

"I'm so sorry," apologised James, stroking her face lovingly.

"What?" asked Lily, with a tint of panic. "What's happened?"

"April," said James dejectedly. "We have until April."

"But that's two weeks away," exclaimed Lily angrily. "Why?"

"She moved it forward," explained James, sorrow in his eyes. "The wedding is going to be at Hogwarts."

"Sounds perfect," laughed Lily bitterly.

"But that doesn't matter because we will make our time together special, Lily, and that's all that matters."

"I might not even be fully recovered by your wedding day."

"You're strong," said James, touching his forehead to hers. "My mother didn't expect you to wake up for another couple of days and yet here you now after only a couple of hours. Besides even if you can barely walk, I will make this two weeks the best two weeks of your life."

"Why does nothing go right for us?" complained Lily, as she nestled her head on his chest and he drew his arms more tightly around her.

James placed a kiss at the top of her head, her hair tickling his chin, wishing he could answer her. But how can you answer a person when you're asking yourself the same question?


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter Thirty Two

He'd been back at Hogwarts for about a week now and he'd already got back into the jumbled way of things- breakfast, teaching, lunch, teaching, marking, dinner, marking, bed. He'd barely seen Lily; Dumbledore had made her stay in the Hospital Wing until she was fully fit to teach again. Despite the fact she had woken up quickly after the traumatic event, it had taken a while for her to recover properly. Today was her first day out of that despicable place and he couldn't wait to see her again.

"Professor Potter," said Nick, waving his hand in front of James's glasses. "Sir, the bell just went. Are we okay to go?"

"What? Oh yes, yeah of course," said James distracted, running his hand through his dishevelled hair. "Sorry about that; I was deep in thought. I'll see all you lot tomorrow."

He watched as his Seventh Years shuffled out of the classroom with only thoughts of their school work and what they'd be doing tonight. When they'd graduate they'll get a shock to the system, thought James with a cynical laugh. Everything gets so much harder. He remembered when he was a student without a care in the world; the only problems he had were trying to win the Quidditch cup and Lily's heart.

Lily.

He had missed her. Just a week and he knew he'd have to last a life time without her; he couldn't do it. Sure, he'd get by with a smile on his face but it wouldn't be real. Soulless. He couldn't even imagine himself like that. He was usually the person who brightened up the room. He was the one who made people smile, laugh. Would Lily feel soulless as well?

He grabbed his ink pot and an elegant eagle feather quill and snatched up a large stack of Seventh Year essays on Advanced Conjuring Spells. Marking was a tedious chore, a past time he had to endure. A smile graced his lips as he watched the emerald green ink slither onto the yellowing parchment. He remembered months ago when he and Lily sat marking together whilst Nick was in detention; playing footsie under the desk. It was a sweet and innocent memory, long before they'd even got together. He wanted that image of her to linger in his mind forever. With a fond grin he set about marking the numerous amounts of essays.

With a slight spring in his step he made his way down a narrow staircase towards the Charms classroom. He'd always liked that classroom as it was never any trouble to get to the Third Floor. Also his seat was next to the window which over looked the school drive. Being a nosy Marauder, he liked seeing who was coming and going to Hogwarts. Charms itself was a lesson of no importance; to him it was only a few spells that could come of use and a whole barrel of ones that humoured him. Of course he would never admit this as it was one of Lily's specialities. She was clever enough to know when they were applicable and useful.

He pushed the wooden door open with very little strength and stepped into the class room with a big grin on his face. All he wanted to do was wrap his arms around her and feel her lips on his.

Oh crap.

He'd forgotten that just because he didn't have a class did not mean she hadn't either. The room full of students looked at him in slight amusement and bemusement. Lily herself who was stood at the front of the classroom, writing something on the board, turned to look at him, her eyebrow raised. He gave her a sheepish smile and his cheeks turned a little rosy.

"Sorry, I didn't realise you were teaching at the moment," smiled James, apologetically. "I'll come back later."

"No wait," said Lily, with her radiant smile. "What is it that you wanted, Professor Potter? I'm sure my Third Years won't mind you interrupting their Cheering Charm theory lesson."

"It was nothing that important; I just wanted a quick word with you," said James, his hazel eyes twinkling.

"Oh well, take a seat at the back of the room," suggested Lily. "After all, lessons are almost over for the day. I'll be with you in five minutes."

He smiled and walked towards the back of the room. He watched Lily teach with interest. It was the first time ever he had seen her interact with a class despite the fact he'd taught at Hogwarts for two terms now.

"Alright girls, as much as you find Professor Potter attractive, I'd prefer it if you stared at him in his lessons and not mine," reprimanded Lily. "Please face the front, there is still five minutes of class left."

A group of red faced teenage girls shuffled around in their seats, embarrassed. James chuckled lightly, he was teaching those girls tomorrow morning. However, he was always tactful enough not to embarrass them, purely because he found fawning fourteen year old girls partially embarrassing for him.

"Could you all turn to page 256 in your text books please," instructed Lily, as she turned to write something on the board. "For your homework, I would like you to use this page to help you write a foot long essay on the uses and dangers of the Cheering Charm. Not only will it be good preparation for your practical class later on week, I wouldn't be at all surprised if the Cheering Charm features in your end of year theory exam."

He stopped listening as she explained exactly what she wanted them to put in their homework. He stared at her properly; there were slight differences in her appearance. No one but him would probably notice- he'd taken it upon himself to notice these things ever since he was a thirteen year old boy. She looked smart as per usual. Her long, wavy, fiery red hair had been tied back, swishing around as she moved. Her emerald green eyes accentuated with a bit of light makeup. Her clothes weren't creased, they never were, the black pencil skirt that showed off her lovely legs and the green, silk blouse that matched her eyes so well. Her appearance was immaculate.

There were just subtle differences. Her complexion was paler than usual, not deathly white as it had been but not the creaminess it should be. The skin under her eyes was dark, she looked tired. She was thin. Well, she'd always been slim, her stomach always flat but she had curves- like a real woman James used to say. She had lost weight. That was to be expected but it still came as a bit of a shock to him.

His fingers came to the piece of parchment in his pocket; a letter from Gwen. He knew he had to show it to Lily but he really didn't want to make her feel any worse than she already did. He sighed as he heard the general rowdy sounds of a class hurrying to get out of a class room.

He looked up to see Lily stood up in front of him, looking down questioningly at him. There was a look of concern lingering in her eyes.

"James, what's the matter?" asked Lily, sitting down in the seat beside his and taking a hold of his hands gently. "You look... broken."

He silently handed her the parchment that he hadn't even intended to show her just yet. The reason he came was to see her not to think about what lies ahead. He watched as she read the letter, her face turning into a frown.

_Dear James,_

_I hope you're having a good time back at Hogwarts. I don't understand why you prefer it to playing Quidditch but for some reason I feel you're more at home there than anyway in the world. That was one of the reasons I decided that the wedding should be held at Hogwarts._

_I have finished arranging everything with Dumbledore. The wedding is going to be this Saturday! Can you believe that soon me, you and our baby are all going to be one little family soon enough?_

_I've been thinking about after the wedding as well. We could buy a little house in Hogsmeade and live there until you've finished teaching. That way we'll be able to live together and you can still teach at Hogwarts at the same time. It's the perfect solution. Although I'm used to a much higher class standard of living I do find the little village very quaint. _

_I know what you're like James, and you probably think that the wedding and the house arrangements are all a big rush but although you are at Hogwarts you are not a teenager. Life is all one big rush! _

_I know you hate wearing dress robes so I've been researching muggle weddings and I love them! So I can't wait to see you in your tux!_

_Lots of Love,_

_Gwen_

_Xxx_

Lily placed the letter down on the table calmly. "At least now we know," she said, staring at it.

"Is knowing exactly when I have to get married, really a good thing?" asked James with a bitter laugh.

"James, please don't be like that," requested Lily, sadly. "Of course it's not a good thing. It was never going to be a good thing whenever you had to get married. Whether it was this Saturday or next year it would still be hard on the both of us."

"This wasn't the plan though," frowned James. "It was supposed to be easier than this. We were supposed to have until the end of the year and then we'd never have to see each other after my wedding. A clean break. Now though, now we'll have to see each other every day for a good three months, knowing we can't be together."

"You're very naive if you thought it would have been a clean break," said Lily, with a sigh. "I think we both know it never would have been. It's going to be really hard at first. After all, we are used to being together every day. Gradually it will get better though, because you'll have your daughter to occupy your thoughts and I'll be working back at the hospital most likely. Working there I won't even have time to think about anything let alone you."

"How can you talk about that so calmly?"

"Because I know I can talk about it calmly or hysterically but either way it's going to happen," replied Lily with a sad smile. "I can't prevent the wedding from happening so there isn't any point in being hysterical."

"You're a better person than me," smiled James, fondly. "If it was you that was getting married, I would be screaming, stomping hitting your fiancé. Anything I could do to stop it."

"I would do too if I knew it would have any impact," smiled Lily. "I'm so proud of you."

"Proud of me? Why?" asked James, surprised.

"Because you have matured so much," said Lily, with a tear rolling down her cheek despite the smile on her face. "You matured from an arrogant git to a decent person in Seventh Year and since then you have just become so much more. You're brave, strong, sensitive, caring, loving. You affect so many people's lives with your mere presence just because you are you. I don't know whether you actually changed or I just changed my prospective on you but I am proud either way and I am so happy I got to be a part of your life if only for a few months."

"Why does this feel like a good bye?" asked James, his cheek damp, he hadn't even noticed he was crying.

"Because it is one," said Lily, shakily placing a kiss on top of his forehead.

"But we still have a couple of days left," protested James, his voice breaking mid sentence, as he wrapped his arm around Lily, clinging on for all his might. "It's only Tuesday, the wedding is on Saturday."

"If I don't say goodbye now, James, I don't think I'll ever be strong enough to," cried Lily into his chest. "If I spend any more time with you I won't be able to let go."

"You were never in my life for just a few months, Lily," admitted James, breathing in the scent of her sweet hair, his tears spilling onto it. "You have been my life since I was thirteen years old. It has always been about you."

A/N: Hey, I don't know whether I'm sorry or happy to tell you this lol, but Strictly Forbidden is nearing an end! I've already written the last few chapters so I will only update when I get twenty five or more reviews for this chapter!!! I know it is harsh conditions but I really want a few more reviews and the ball is in your court!!! Hope you enjoyed this chapter!!!


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter Thirty Three

James stared off into the room as he had a sip of firewhiskey, his eyes focusing and un-focusing. He wasn't drunk although he suspected many would have presumed he was. In his own little world, feelings of dread and sadness ran through his mind and heart as he thought about tomorrow. His wedding day.

"James, I know you might not be able to handle the fact that she's not the girl of your dreams and tomorrow will not be the happiest day of your life," said Sirius, seriously. "But that doesn't mean that you can't still have a great stag night. It's your last night as a free man and as your best friend, your brother; I think you deserve to celebrate."

"I can handle the fact that Gwen is not the girl of my dreams," said James, without emotion, looking at Sirius with vacant hazel eyes. "I just can't handle the fact that I will be marrying her when the girl I really love will be sat only a few metres away."

"Lily's coming to the wedding?" asked Remus, a little surprised. He was sat on the squishy brown leather couch next to Sirius across from James who was slouched in the matching arm chair, in James's living quarters. His friends had come to Hogwarts in preparation for the wedding, which all the school was buzzing about, and tonight they were supposed to be having a stag party. James did not possess the party spirit.

"It would look strange if she didn't," explained James, placing his empty glass on the table in front of him, with a stretch. "Everybody knows she is one of my closest friends. Especially with all the Witch Weekly staff there, it's gossip and suspicious."

"So you are putting her through all of that just to avoid a bit of gossip," stated Sirius, disgusted. James looked up at him, hurt flashing in his eyes.

"You think I want to?" exclaimed James, feeling like a piece of dirt. He treated the people he loved awfully when all he wanted to do was make them happy. "We both decided months ago that she was going to come. In fact I left it to her to make the decision. To be honest, I don't care because either way this is going to be the hardest thing I have ever had to do."

"You're stronger than me," admitted Sirius. "If I was in your situation, I'd have grabbed Lily, shoved her on the back of my motorbike and you'd never see us ever again."

"Now that would never happen," laughed James, for the first time that week. "You'd get bored far too easily."

"I don't know why I'm still friends with you," smirked Sirius. "I think my brilliance is unappreciated."

"You would be correct," sniggered Remus. "It's kind of nice this you know, despite all that's happening, us three together again. If only Peter was here, it would be the Marauders reunited."

"It's a shame Peter can't make it tomorrow," said James. "It's been ages since I've seen him." He heard his fellow Marauders, 'hmmm' in thought and he could hear the Wireless Radio in the background, playing songs he'd never had the chance to listen to.

"Whatever he is doing I hope he's found something worthwhile to do with his life," said Remus thoughtfully. "He spent so much of his life hanging around with us I don't think he ever found out his own personality."

"Well I did and he's a wimp," laughed Sirius.

"Sirius, be nice, he's still your friend," smiled James. He had missed times with his friends and they were managing to cheer him up but he still felt something missing. He could kid himself and pretend that missing person was Peter but he knew it wasn't a person that was missing; it was a piece of his heart.

"James, we're running short on drinks," noticed Remus, looking at the empty glasses and bottles on the coffee table on front of them. "Sirius and I will nip down the kitchens to get some butterbeer. I don't think you should drink anymore of the hard stuff. You are after all getting married tomorrow, you don't want to be hung over or something like that."

"Yeah sure," said James, with a brief smile. "Although hung over or not I don't think that would make much of a difference."

"Please be a bit happier, James, for us," said Sirius, softly, before he disappeared out of the room with Remus in tow. James cringed as the heavy wooden door creaked loudly to a shut.

The silence was deafening. Between teaching and spending time with Sirius and Remus, he hadn't had a moment's peace to himself apart from when he went to sleep. He didn't like the silence, it made his thoughts dominant. In fact, it made his thoughts scream. He turned up the volume on the radio, anything to drown out the sound of his own mind. He vaguely recognised the song that was playing, his mind tuning into the words.

_I'm sittin' here all by myself  
just tryin' to think of something to do  
Tryin' to think of something, anything  
just to keep me from thinking of you  
But you know it's not working out  
'cause you're all that's on my mind  
One thought of you is all it takes  
to leave the rest of the world behind_

Oh, I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did  
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did  
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did  
And you didn't mean to love me back  
but I know you did

I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself  
that you're not the one for me  
But the more I think, the less I believe it  
and the more I want you here with me  
You know the holidays are coming up  
I don't want to spend them alone  
Memories of Christmas time with you  
would just kill me if I'm on my own

Oh, I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did  
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did  
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did  
And you didn't mean to love me back

I know it's not the smartest thing to do  
we just can't seem to get it right  
But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight  
one more chance tonight

I'm sittin' here tryin' to entertain myself with this old guitar  
But with all my inspiration gone it's not getting me very far  
I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you  
Oh please, baby won't you take my hand  
we've got nothing left to prove

Oh, I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did  
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did  
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did  
And you didn't mean to love me back  
but I know you did

And I didn't mean to meet you then  
when we were just kids  
And I didn't mean to give you chills  
the way that I kiss  
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did  
And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did  
Don't say you didn't love me back 'cause you know you did  
No, you didn't mean to love me back  
But you did

Whilst listening to the song he hadn't even notice his eyes become watery. He had wanted to drown out his thoughts but if anything he had made them louder. The song has been so... relevant. Sure, it wasn't Christmas time soon and he didn't have a guitar having never played one in his life. It was the song's meaning that struck him hard; it explained everything he was going through. He was trying to convince himself to not think of Lily but '_One thought of you is all it takes to leave the rest of the world behind,'. _He hadn't meant to fall in love with Lily and he knew she hadn't meant to fall in love with him but it had just happened.

He had been a kid when they had just met, and when he had first fell in love but that did not mean it was any less important or special because that love had stayed with him forever and he assumed it always would._  
_

"Go spend this last night with Lily," said Sirius firmly, from the doorway, with a sad frown on his face, mirroring Remus's who was stood next to him.

"We already said good bye on Tuesday," replied James dismissively.

"You didn't have a proper good bye," said Remus gently, trying to persuade the broken man in front of him. "You both deserve one more night of happiness."

James nodded mutely.

"Think of it as closure."

"I can't just leave," retorted James, running a hand through his tousled raven hair. "What about you guys?"

"To be perfectly honest, trying to pretend that everyone is going to be okay and it'll turn out happy in the end, is tiring Remus and I out," said Sirius, unbuttoning the top buttons of his shirt and slumping down on the couch with a sigh. "We wanted to give you the best stag night we could in the situation and we believe the only way to make you happy is to let you have this last night with Lily."

"You are the best friends any bloke could ask for," smiled James, standing up to give them both a manly firm hug. "I know that you'll always stand by me no matter what happens."

"Of course we will," laughed Remus. "Go to Lily, James, you need to."

James drew in a nervous deep breath as he stood outside Lily's sleeping chambers. Not only was this little visit completely unexpected as they had already parted ways, it was now one o'clock in the morning, and no doubt she'd be fast asleep. He raised his hand shakily (although he would never admit it) and knocked on the door sharply.

He could hear the shuffling sounds which he presumed was Lily's feet padding along the cold stone flooring. Moment later, the wooden door was pulled out of sight and was replaced by a surprised Lily; he hoped pleasantly surprised. The mere sight of her made his heart flutter and his lips bow into a smile. Her bright, red hair was slightly rumpled as it cascaded around and over her shoulders. She was wearing a thin, black, silk kimono over a matching short night dress which had thing straps and a plunging neckline. The sleeves of her kimono had been rolled back to her elbows and he noticed her creamy coloured arms had goose bumps. He looked at her face, memorising it for the last time, and did not like what he saw. Her lovely green eyes were accentuated by puffiness and redness from crying, exhausted.

"Remus said you were having your stag night tonight," said Lily confused. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to see you," said James softly, resting his palm on her cheek, caressingly it gently. "I had to."

"We've already said goodbye," cried Lily, tears streaming down her face.

"Not properly, Lily," muttered James, placing kisses on her face to wipe away her tears, his mingling with hers. "I need to say goodbye to you; all of you."

Lily's watery emerald eyes pierced through his, gazing with sadness. She laced her fingers through with his and gently pulled him into her bed chambers, closing the door behind them. She grasped his shirt as she sobbed, unbuttoning his shirt haphazardly. With his own salty tears rolling down his face, he slipped off her kimono and night dress with ease, leaving her with only a pair of white lacy knickers on.

His eyes trailed down her body with longing and hunger. He grasped her close, with his hands on her waist, smothering her neck with kisses. His hot breaths making her shiver.

"You are so beautiful," breathed James, heavily, as his hands roamed her body greedily.

Lily responded by pulling his shirt off over his head and unbuttoning his pants. She led him over to her queen sized bed and sat down on it, pulling his trousers down before leaning back onto the pillows and waiting for him to follow. He felt her eyes travelling down his naked body and he felt shy for some reason.

They had done this countless of times but for some reason this occasion was different. He felt pressured. Not pressured to perform, he knew he could do that quite easily considering how much he was attracted to Lily and how much he loved her but pressured to make it memorable. He wanted to memorise every bit of her of her body; every contour, every crevice, every little bit he cherished. It was like their first time together all over again, they wanted to get it right.

He sat on the bed, his hands tracing around her bellybutton softly, with a smile on his face. He lowered himself over her so he was on top of her comfortably for both of them, a familiar position and yet it all seemed so new; senses heightened. He let his fingers hook on to the sides of her underwear and he tugged them down. The heat, the arousal, the sad longing.

"Are you sure about this?" asked James, stroking her hair lovingly, staring into her lovely green eyes which were usually a source of comfort, his haven.

"We need to say goodbye," stated Lily hollowly, pulling his head down to hers for hungry desperate kiss.

James stared at Lily as she slept peacefully in his arms. The tears hadn't stopped tumbling from his eyes since he had arrived at Lily's room. He was glad she was asleep; she couldn't cry when she was asleep. It broke his heart to see her like this. Lily was a strong woman, she wasn't a crier. He remembered from Seventh Year that she had barely cried at her father's death, instead she chose to think about the future. Now though it seemed so much more intense.

James himself never cried. Even Sirius cried at a sad movie once in a while, but James was the one who realised it was make-believe. He wasn't cold hearted; he just always thought tears were supposed to be kept for the things that really mattered. The thought of making Lily cry and having to leave her made him want to sob his heart out.

He never once imagined he would cry whilst having sex. Sex was one of his favourite things he wouldn't deny it; it was a thrill he loved to do. They had both cried throughout tonight because they both understood that this was goodbye. This was it.

He glanced at the clock, counting down the inevitable hours until his wedding. Tick tock. Tick tock.

A/N: wow thank you for all the amazing reviews, they mean so much to me. Oooohh the wedding is soooo close. Now I think it's time to up the game a little bit. Considering for the last chapter I got over forty reviews (thank you again so much) I think now I need fifty reviews for this chapter for the next one to be updated. I would appreciate any advice you have to offer, thank you again x x x


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter Thirty Four

The glass window pane felt cool against his forehead, as he stared out into the grounds. A beautiful wooden altar had been set up upon a slightly raised stage where he would say his vows. Intricately placed white and pink roses had been entwined and twisted around the arch way. Hundreds of white chairs had been placed on both sides of the aisle, on the right his side and on the left Gwen's side for friends and family. He felt honoured that so many people had come to show him support and share his 'happy' day with him. Flowers lined the sides of the aisle. It was a pretty sight and one that made his heart glow warm despite the heavy sadness weighing it down.

The sun mocked him, as he looked up towards the sky. It was so bright; sunny and warm, perfect for a wedding. He'd half expected it to pour it down with rain with thunder clouds hovering high above them; to match his feelings.

He had managed to fall asleep at some point during the night although he did not know when. His eyes had flickered open this morning, when he felt a pair of soft lips brush gently against his cheek. He remembered grabbing a hold of her thin, creamy wrist and placed a tender kiss at her pulse point, and watching as she took a deep breath in, before leaving the bedroom. Leaving him.

He himself had then left her room, to get ready and to start a new life. This led him to where he was now, his head full of thoughts resting heavily against the cold glass of the window. His bow tie was hanging loosely around his neck; he could never tie them up correctly.

"Are you ready for this?" asked his dad, as he began doing James's tie for him.

"I have to be," sighed James, looking into his father's crystal blue eyes that had always contained all the answers James needed; now they were merely sympathetic.

"I never wanted your wedding day to be like this," admitted Harry.

"And you think I did?" scoffed James, before weakening his glare. "Sorry, I'm not in the best of moods as you can imagine."

"It's not too late to call it off, you know," said Harry, his hands on his son's shoulders.

"I can't, you know I can't," replied James with a sad smile. "It's the day of my wedding and the guests have already started being seated! I can't do that to Gwen or Lily. I've treated them both so poorly; at least I can start making it up to one of them."

"But it's not the one you want to make happy."

"There's the Potter's name and reputation to uphold."

"I care a lot more of the welfare and happiness of my only child than what people think of our family," said Harry with warmth and sincerity. "And your mother does too."

"I know you do, Dad, that's why I love you both," smiled James. "I've got to do this though. I've got to decide what's best for that little girl who will be in my life so soon."

"I'm proud of you, James," said Harry softy, making a few final touches and tweaks to the bow tie.

"I wish I was," muttered James quietly, as he stared out of the window one last time before making his way down to the altar himself.

As James stood on the slightly raised altar, he was wishing by some miracle that Gwen was the one who didn't turn up. How messed up was he? He wanted to be jilted at the altar more than he wanted to get married. He knew Gwen wouldn't do that though; she was ecstatic to marry him. This wedding was all she had thought about for the past couple of months. He glanced around the grounds nervously; it was quite stressful being stood at the front, with hundreds of peoples' eyes on you. The aisle was even more elaborate and beautiful from this angle although he knew no angle would make him feel happy about this wedding. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Sirius, who was stood with Remus and Peter (who had finally managed to show up), give him a comfortingly and assuring smile. He could count on his brothers. Behind James, Dumbledore was stood behind the ornate eagle podium that usually resided in the Great Hall. His mere presence made a person in awe of him; wearing his best robes, his long white hair and beard neatly groomed and his periwinkle blue eyes twinkling behind his half moon glasses- yet the wizened wise wizard always put people at ease. James was glad Dumbledore was officially allowed to perform the wedding as he didn't like the idea of a ministry representative who he didn't know involved in something so personal. Everything would be ok with Dumbledore here.

James looked up as he heard the string quartet start playing the wedding march. He'd always placed strings as a sorrowful type of music not happy but then again he supposed that was quite fitting. Gwen linked with her father, made their way gracefully down the aisle and the swoons and sighs of emotion started occurring from the guests. Gwen had a glowing smile on her radiant face and her eyes had a glint of determination. She was attired in her long, flowing strapless white dress that swished and dragged on the floor behind her. Her hair had been pinned up elegantly and beautifully ordained with small pink roses. He couldn't deny she wasn't beautiful and his heart seemed to miss a beat as his eyes caught sight of her baby bump, which seemed to have grown in the two weeks he had not been with her.

She had seemed to reach him in no time at all and before he knew it, the wedding had begun.

"We are gathered here today on this beautiful spring day to witness a beautiful occasion," said Dumbledore, his voice both full of authority and tenderness. "The uniting of two people loved by society, friends, family but more importantly by each other. Love is something special and should be treated with respect and cherished forever. Now on a slightly negative and legal note, I have to ask if there is anyone who objects to this union; please speak now or forever hold your peace."

James meekly looked towards the right side of the aisle where his family and friends were seated. He knew some of them were probably desperate to say something but knew better than to ruin his 'happy day'. He glanced at the front row and saw his mother, Lily and Rory. Rory and his mother were both holding Lily's hands tightly in comfort, his mother with a sad smile on her face and Rory with a slight glare. Lily herself was smiling that beautiful smile he had fallen in love with all over again this past year. However it was tainted by the tears streaming down her face and he could see just how broken she really was. To anyone else it would look like she had tears of happiness for her best friend but people who knew the two of them knew that she was empty on the inside. He knew she wouldn't say anything; she had come to accept her fate. James looked back towards Gwen and Dumbledore when he started speaking again and James couldn't help but notice the smug expression on Gwen's face.

"Thankfully, no one has any objections, and I may proceed with this special wedding," smiled Dumbledore. "Do you, Gwendoline Elizabeth Barker, take this man, James Harold Darwin Potter, to be your husband, according to Merlin's lawful decree? Do you promise to be to him a loving and loyal wife, to cherish and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, to be faithful only to him as long as you both shall live?"

Gwen looked towards Dumbledore briefly before turning to James with a smile and happiness shining in her eyes. She took his calloused hands in her soft manicured hands and squeezed them gently. Staring into his hazel eyes she said ever so softly, "I do."

James's heart, felt a pang of guilt as he realised Gwen may actually love him; her words had been so rare and emotional. She deserved better than his lies and empty nonexistent love for her. Part of him thought that she knew he didn't love her and that it was the fame and attention from marrying him she desired therefore love didn't particularly play a part in any of this but today he felt bad for thinking that. Although, she might have had a better acting ability than he had first suspected. Dumbledore had begun uttering the words he had been dreading.

"Do you, James Harold Darwin Potter, take this woman, Gwendoline Elizabeth Barker, to be your wife, according to Merlin's lawful decree? Do you promise to be to her a loving and loyal husband, to cherish and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, to be faithful only to her as long as you both shall live?" 

Everybody stared at him expectantly. It was his turn to answer; to lie. The glowing smile on Gwen's face dimmed just a little as she could see the intricate and confused cogs turning and getting jammed in his mind. People started to whisper and conspire quietly amongst themselves.

"James?" prompted Dumbledore, his periwinkle eyes no longer twinkling behind the half moon glasses.

"I-I-" stuttered James, his face paling.

"James, what are you playing at?" muttered Gwen, through clenched teeth.

A sob broke out and the gentle thuds of running filled James's ears. He turned around to see Lily, running up the aisle, getting away from the wedding. Her knee length green dress swishing around and her left down glorious red hair swinging from side to side.

"Lily," shouted out James, calling after her. "Lily."

"It's our wedding day and it's still all about her!" exclaimed Gwen, angrily.

"She's my friend! I'm allowed to be worried about her," snapped James, barely thinking about the fact there were reporters and guests currently watching their little argumentative spectacle.

"She was never just a friend though was she James?" said Gwen venomously. "I've been competing with her ever since you started teaching here. She dumped you years ago and you're still madly in love with her!"

"You don't know what you're talking about," said James with a sigh.

"Yes I do," cried Gwen, frustrated. "I saw the both of you dancing at the Halloween party."

"You told me to dance with her!"

"Something I regret everyday because I saw how the two of you connected; how you fitted together. That's why I slept with Ethan." Gasps were heard by his ears.

"Don't blame me for your mistakes," said James. He couldn't bring himself to be angry because he knew he was guilty. "If it wasn't for the fact you're having my baby I would have left you as soon as I found out you betrayed me."

"Why do you think I had to be pregnant?" said Gwen hysterically. "I don't want kids! I just knew that if I wasn't it wouldn't be long before you left me for her." She grabbed her wand from her bridesmaid and pointed it towards her stomach. James's blood went cold and people screamed.

"No Gwen don't!" he shouted, but he was too late as he watched the red shot of light shoot into her body. "You're a murderer!"

She rolled her eyes and watched him as he stared at her stomach in confusion as it shrank back to her usual slim model figure. Everybody was confused.

"I was never pregnant," spat out Gwen. "It was a charm; anything to keep you from that wench."

"How dare you!" shouted James lividly, his heart slowly turning to stone. "You have no idea how close I am to hitting you as hard as I can. You deserve it. When I first met you I knew you were one of those superficial bitchy girls you hang around with but I never thought you could be so callous. I'm just thankful you're not actually pregnant; I think a child would rather burn in Hell than have you as a mother. You are a sick person."

"We were great together until she came along," proclaimed Gwen. "She ruined it all. We were the 'it' couple."

"We were the never the 'it' couple, only to the magazines we were," explained James, hatred burning his hazel irises. "We would have made each other miserable in the long run. You should have let me go instead of being a spiteful bitch."

"How can you call me a bitch for trying to keep us together?"

"Because it tore me and Lily apart!" shouted James. "She and I were happy when we were together; in love. An experience, which a person like you, will never have. You made me put her through Hell; you made me break her heart into tiny little pieces. You were never the one who I wanted standing next to me at the altar. You disgust me."

"I don't have to listen to you," said Gwen viciously. "I have a better life I can be having without you so I'm going to leave."

"Good as long as we never have to see your face again," smirked Sirius, as James turned away from everything; his mind was too full. The chairs were almost empty as Remus had been directing people back up to the castle all the way through their quarrel. He could count on his brothers.

"The ring," said James, softly.

"What?" snapped Gwen.

"The engagement ring," clarified James. "I want it back."

Gwen ragged it off her finger, with a force that made James wince, and threw it down to floor at James's feet angrily before stalking off to Merlin knows where.

'What a wedding' thought James bitterly, his head spinning with so many other thoughts, as he bent down to hold the precious family heirloom in his grasp.

A/N: I am soooo sorry!!! I know I got my fifty reviews a long time ago but my laptop broke  but now its all fixed and I added more to this chapter to make up for it hehe and I won't ask for a number of reviews but it would be nice if you did review  sorry again x x x


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter Thirty Five

He was surprised that they had not bumped to each other near the Lake more often when they were students as they both seemed to come here to think and recollect. His feet always carried his body towards the patch of trees, where he could sit in the cool breeze of the shade and not be disturbed. However he knew Lily favoured one of the bigger rocks at the Lake edge so he let his feet lead him to there.

He saw her sat on the rock, her feet dangling in the dark water with her ballet style green shoes sat beside her, the material of her vivid green dress sprawled around her. He watched her stare out towards the vast still lake, a lone tear dribbling down her face. As he stood leant against a beech tree, he wished he would never have to see such sadness on her face again.

"Fancy seeing you here," said James softly, as he sat down next to her, unlacing his own shoes. He shivered slightly when his feet were first engulfed in the chilly water.

"How did you know I was here?" asked Lily, as she hastily wiped away her tear with the back of her hand, still staring out at the water.

"I know you either come here or to the library to think and considering you're likely to bump into people in the castle, you'd come here," explained James, picking up a flat, smooth rock and making it skim across the surface of water a few times before it sank in the murky waters. "That and it's a nice day."

"I'm sorry for ruining your wedding," apologised Lily, quietly. "I just couldn't bear to hear you say those words to somebody else. I thought I was strong enough but I'm not."

"Lily, you're the strongest person I know," said James with a scoffing laugh. "Most people would have cracked a lot sooner than you did."

She turned to look at, casting him a scrutinizing glance. "Surely you're little wife will be missing you."

"I didn't get married."

"What?" exclaimed Lily, with a soft gasp. "But the baby-"

"Is nonexistent."

"I don't understand," said Lily, confused. Her eyebrows scrunched up and he had to suppress a small smile.

"There never was a baby," explained James, with a sad smile, running a hand through his course hair as he stared out onto the lake. "She tricked people into believing she was pregnant with a charm because she thought I was going to split up with her to be with you instead. She was probably going to fake a tragic miscarriage too."

"How can a person do such a thing?" cried out Lily, outraged, with her fiery red hair she looked wild and vivacious. "It's practically evil."

"Jealousy causes people to do stupid things," said James with a wry smile.

"I don't understand why you're not livid," said Lily furiously, her emerald eyes ablaze. "How can you not be angry? She did the most awful thing and you're just giving her excuses."

"I was angry at first, of course I was, but now that I've processed it I am relieved," said James, with a huge grin on his face, his hand gently squeezing her waist. "I don't care what she did because now I can be with you. It feels like a great weight has been lifted off my shoulders and my arms are no longer tired so they're free to wrap themselves around you."

"It's not that simple," said Lily, running her hand through her hair, a habit James was proud to say came from him. "It will be in the papers, everyone will know! Including the students. Including Dumbledore!"

"Then marry me!" The words had barely registered in his brain before they were spoken very clearly and loudly by his lips. They were both surprised by what he'd said but he knew it was right. The way things were supposed to be. "Do it. Marry me. Be my bride. My wife. The woman who I'll kiss every morning, every night and every minute in between without having to hide it. I want to spend the rest of my days with you Lily. This is it. You're the one for me."

She looked so painfully broken yet innocent. Her lips formed a sad smile and her eyes shone with confusion and shock, tears rolled down her porcelain cheeks. She had never looked as beautiful to him as she did then. He knew through the tears and smiles, happiness and upsets; no matter what happened to him she would always be beautiful, always be his.

"How will that solve anything?"

"Because I love you."

"James, you know I love you too but we are in an impossible situation," stated Lily seriously. "There are repercussions that are unbearable to imagine. What about the fact that it's against the rules? It's strictly forbidden. What about Dumbledore? What about the horrible Lysandra woman?"

"Screw the rules, Lily. Screw that wretched woman and screw Dumbledore. If I'm forced to pick you or my job; I pick you every time. I'll resign today if I have to."

"Think about this carefully, this is your career we're talking about."

"No, it's not, it's my life and quite frankly, it's not worth living without you by my side," smiled James. "Marry me Lily. Please, I have a ring and everything."

Lily's lips formed a wry smile as she let out a small laugh. "Yes, the one left over from your previous engagement. You're really selling yourself here James."

"This ring was never meant for Gwen," sighed James. He played with the valuable ring, flicking it from finger to finger cautiously, aware that it could fall into the Lake. "My grandmother died the summer before Seventh Year and she left me this ring and a letter explaining what to do with the ring. It had to be saved so I could give it to the woman I love the most; the girl with the red hair and the green eyes that I spoke so fondly of. When I knew I had to propose to Gwen, I didn't have time to get another ring, I had to use this one. It was always supposed to go on your finger."

"James, getting married is a ridiculous idea," said Lily, her voice sounding so raw. Her beautiful green eyes looked torn and tired. He hated to see her at such distress. "It feels right now but we haven't even dated."

"Yes we have," stated James, fighting for their love.

"For a few weeks, James!" exclaimed Lily. "And that was five, nearly six, years ago. We all know how badly that ended."

"You can't be saying this, Lily," said James shaking his head sadly. "That ended through no fault of ours."

"Yeah but look how quickly I turned against you," said Lily, rubbing her eyes with the heel of her hand. "What if something else stands in our way like that again? How am I going to react knowing that you easily cheated on Gwen with me?"

"None of that matters if you trust me," said James, capturing both of her hands in his, holding them close to his chest. "I love you, Lily. To me, nothing else matters. I know my track record is nothing to be proud of and of course it must worry you that I'll repeat myself. But, I did what I did for you. I cheated on her for you and I would never do it for anyone other than you. I trust you and I need to know that you trust me because if you don't then I don't think we can go any further.

"I- I-"

"Do you trust me?" asked James urgently, his grip on her hands tightening. She looked up, her brilliant green eyes staring at him uncertain. He tried his hardest to practically pour his love out of his own hazel eyes. They seem to be stood there for hours yet he knew it was most likely only moments. He willed her to speak, the silence unbearable.

"Yes," relented Lily, softly. "Of course I trust you, James. Even back in Hogwarts before we started dating, probably before I even liked you as a person I trusted you. There's something about you that's so trustworthy. That's not the point though, James. Sure, we're good in bed together and I do love you but in the real world we could rubbish together. Or perhaps without all this secrecy to keep us occupied maybe we'll get bored of each other."

"I could never get bored of you, Lily," sighed James. "I spent a good five years chasing after you at Hogwarts without getting bored. Despite all that's happened, this year has been the best; I've had you. I am not going to lose you now. I don't care that we've never really dated properly but I don't understand why we should, cause I know everything important about you and I love you."

Lily smiled, happily. "I love you too."

"Well, thank Merlin for that."

Lily grabbed the ring from in between his fingers and stared at it, mockingly inspecting it. She slipped it on her ring finger on her left hand, holding her hand up towards the sun with a cheeky smile on her face. "Hmm, well I suppose it fits nicely."

"Is that a yes?" grinned James, jumping up onto his feet, pulling Lily up onto hers. He cupped her face softly with both hands, smiling into her deep emerald eyes.

"Yes!" laughed Lily, before he captured her mouth into a sweet, loving kiss. He grinned as he could feel her smile against his lips. He moved his hands down to her waist where he got a firm grip so he could pick her up and twirl around. He put her down after a few spins, not wanting to slip on the rock and tumble them both into the Lake. He grabbed her hand and kissed her ring.

"Oh I feel like royalty," smirked Lily. James laughed before dipping his head down to give her a quick kiss.

"This is how carefree and happy life should always be," smiled James.

"It won't feel carefree when we have to tell people."

"Let's go to the Great Hall now and get it over and done with," suggested James.

Lily bit her lip. "Gwen and her family... I'm going to get my eyes clawed out."

"Gwen stormed off," said James, with a slight chuckle. "Her bunch of shallow friends and family went with her. Remus told all my lot to go to the Great Hall and start the party. He knew we needed privacy and knowing that clever git, he knew we'd be in a party mood."

"You've got very respectful friends of your family in there," reminded Lily. "They're not exactly going to approve. Don't forget Dumbledore – I know you said you'd resign but what if he fires me?"

"I'll tell him it was my entire fault. That I led you astray so to speak," smirked James, waggling his eyebrows.

"Be serious," asked Lily warningly.

"Lily, I am being serious," said James, his voice soft, his hazel eyes pleading with her. "You mean more to me than my job, my friends, and my family. As long as you're by my side, you're all that matters. If I have to get into trouble instead of you then I will. I just want to see you happy and, this could just be me being hopeful, but you seemed happy a moment ago when you put that ring on your finger."

He watched hopefully as she stared at her left hand with scrutiny, the precious stones glittered in the bright sunshine. He felt his heart glow with warmth as she smiled, her emerald eyes glancing up at him timidly.

"Do you remember when we first saw each other at the beginning of the year? When I stormed into your classroom?" asked Lily, with a smile. He nodded and waiting for her to continue patiently. "You blew me away. I think I actually staggered a little when I first saw you. Even though I was furious with you, you still had that effect on me. You always will."

"I'm going to presume that's a good thing," smirked James, cupping her face lightly. "I think we should go now. I need to introduce my new fiancée to everybody."

"Ooh I look forward to meeting her," grinned Lily. "I've heard she was rather attractive."

"Stunning," murmured James, as he leant down to capture her lips in a sweet kiss.


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter Thirty Six

James paused as they entered the entrance hall. The double doors of the Great Hall were open but for the moment they were out of view from everyone in there. A loud buzz of chatter and general party gathering noises filled their ears. He knew that as soon as they walked in, an uncomfortable silence would wash over everyone. He looked down at Lily, who looked incredibly nervous, and placed his hands on her forearms, his thumb gently rubbing them.

"If we go in there, Lily, there is no turning back," said James, gazing at her with a sad longing as he grabbed her left her hand and held it by her ring finger. "I have wanted to put a ring on your finger ever since I was thirteen years old but if you have any doubts at all you have to take it off. This has to be a definite thing if we walk in there."

"I don't know whether I should be angry or not about the fact you doubt me but this ring is staying on my finger," said Lily with a smile, her hand reaching up entwine into his raven tresses. "I may not have liked you or loved you for as long as you have me but I know how you've made me feel this past year and I know how you're making me feel right now."

James grinned, placing his hand over hers and taking it out of his hair so he could clasp it warmly in his own. "I don't think my thirteen year old self would have quite believed this."

"I don't think my thirteen year old self would believe this either," laughed Lily, giving his hand a squeeze.

"We're going to do this," said James, a large smile spreading across his face. "I'll go in first, they'll be too determined to find out what happened to notice you sneak in."

"I'm not ashamed of the fact I've been sleeping with you all year," admitted Lily hotly.

"I know you're not, flower, and neither am I," soothed James. "But like you said there are a lot of respectable people in there not to mention all the students. I don't want you subject to the stares and silence until they know."

"I understand," smiled Lily. "I'll weave my way to Alice and Rory."

"I sort of feel like I did before my first professional Quidditch match," claimed James. "Scared and nervous but filled with such an excitement."

"And you'll do just as brilliant now as you did then," said Lily, placing a soft kiss on his lips.

"I will do now," smiled James. "Right here I go, if I run out screaming make sure you follow my lead."

James inhaled deeply before walking into view of the Great Hall and calmly strode into the Hall with determination splashed across his face. Unnervingly, everybody hushed and the huge hall was cloaked in near silence. The only sounds were that of his shoes thudding along the floor. He walked briskly up to the head table where he and Gwen were supposed to feed each other wedding cake and act sickly in love. He stood still bravely as everyone's eyes were on him. Luckily James was used to crowds and public speaking but this was still nerve wracking for him.

"Hello everyone," said James loudly, capturing everyone's attention. Nobody even noticed Lily slipping in quietly. "I suppose you're all wondering what an earth happened here today and I owe those who don't know the details an explanation."

"An explanation would be appreciated," said Dumbledore in an uneasily even tone.

James nodded with enough respect to look ashamed with himself. "I never wanted to marry Gwen, and I'm sorry all of you had to be involved in today's activities. Wow... standing here is like being in that dream where you are walking around school naked."

"Well you should know," laughed Remus. "You did it sixth year." James grinned, remembering the memory fondly as the hall erupted in chuckles.

"It's probably how you got Lily to fall for you in the first place," smirked Sirius, wiggling his eyebrows up and down. James flushed red and waiting for the mutterings to cease. He glanced at Lily who was slinking behind Rory, she peaked out and sent an encouraging smile at him.

"Thanks for that, Sirius," grinned James, laughing when Sirius shouted out, 'Anytime." "I'd actually forgotten I'd done that, it was against my will as a dare may I add but I apologise for anyone who was mentally scarred by that." He grew more confident as the crowd laughed. Although he was slightly disturbed as some of the female students had dreamlike expressions across their faces.

"Anyways, I'm here to explain what happened today," said James, back to point. "I only proposed to Gwen because she was pregnant but she was never with child and it was all a ploy. A lie. A lie to stop me from breaking up with her so I could be with the one person I have always loved. I love Lily Evans, I always have and I certainly always will." Gasps ensued among the students, but the adults (especially the ones who were acquainted with James in his youth) had already been filling in the blanks.

James turned slightly, to look at Dumbledore. "I have apologised for the upset caused today but I will not apologise for loving Lily. I am fully aware that it's against the rules so before you can say anything, I will be handing in my resignation at some point today."

"No!" shouted out Lily, moving to stand in full view of James. "Don't you dare! Don't you give this up for me."

"Lily, I'm only here temporarily anyways," explained James, with a sigh. "After this summer, Professor McGonagall will be back. It's a matter of months before I leave Hogwarts so it doesn't really matter if I cut my short time here even shorter."

"But you love it here."

"I love you more though."

"If you leave Hogwarts you have nothing apart from me. If I leave then I can have you but I also have my career in Healing."

"We talked about this before and I don't care," declared James. "The only thing that matters to me is that I have finally gotten an engagement ring on your finger and it will soon be joined by a wedding ring."

"You finally proposed to the right girl, Prongsie," smirked Sirius, with thumbs up. James grinned warmly at his best friend, yes, he had finally proposed to the right girl.

"Now that you've explained to everybody exactly what happened today, I'm sure you won't mind accompanying me in the antechamber to talk about this matter in private," suggested Dumbledore, in a tone that suggested the fact it was merely suggestion quite out of the question. "Miss Evans too, will be required."

"If you don't mind, Albus, Louise and I will join you too," said his father, with his arm around Lily in a comforting embrace. James' mother was also stood with them; all three of them had walked towards James and Dumbledore. "I feel as though I should be in there to offer my support to my son and his intended bride."

"As you wish," said Dumbledore, as the five of them fled the stares and whispers of the people in the Great Hall to the small room that was behind the door to the side of the staff table.

James glanced at Lily as they entered the portrait filled room. Her face was solemn and nervous and he felt so guilty for causing this. He couldn't even comfort her because no doubt that would make things worse between him and Dumbledore. His parents, though, could do what they want; his mother was holding her hand and his father had placed his hand on her back, guiding her into the room.

Lily must have felt his hazel eyes on her because she looked up at him with a large radiant smile and he suddenly remembered that nothing else mattered. He would do anything if it meant he could see her dazzle him with her smile for the rest of his days.

"Oi! Potter! You finally got a ring on Evans' finger then?" asked a loud, high pitched voice. James whirled round, as did the others, trying to locate who had spoken. "I thought you were smart, Potter. It's me, Vi."

James grinned as he walked over towards the portrait of Violet, a pale wizened old witch who often had a little bit too much to drink with the Fat Lady. "I'm sorry, Vi, I didn't realise you're portrait was down here."

"We thought it might encourage her to behave a little more appropriately if she was down here," explained Dumbledore. "But alas, she still manages to get into mischief."

"Everybody likes a drink when the occasion arises for one, Dumbleydore," giggled Violet. "Besides this is a great occasion because I have won a bet! The Fat Lady owes me some booze for this."

"You betted that I would propose to Lily?" asked James with a smile.

"Of course not," scoffed Violet. "You asked her out about five times a day, of course we knew you'd propose. We gambled on her answer. You see, that's a little bit more unpredictable than your questions."

James heard his father laugh, and low chuckle resided in his own throat. "Well congratulations, Vi, luckily for me and for you she said yes."

"Yes well, I'll be getting off now, but make sure you come visit me again someday," said Violet, as she started walking through other people's portraits and eventually disappearing from the room altogether.

"You can't say this wasn't completely unexpected, Albus," remarked Harry, with a small smile on his face. James was glad his father had decided to break the ice first, as he himself had been wracking his brains for something to say and he had drawn a blank.

"I can't," said Dumbledore in agreement before turning to James, his blue eyes dimmed by the serious expression on his face. "Were you telling the truth?"

"Telling the truth?" asked James, perplexed. "I'm sorry, sir, I don't quite understand what you're asking."

"At the beginning of the year when I told you professors were not allowed to be intimately involved and you said you wouldn't dream of it, were you being truthful?"

"Yes sir, of course," replied James.

"And when I asked you once more on Valentine's day? And you assured me that you weren't so I told you, you were either a great liar or you had truly grown up. Which one was it?" asked Dumbledore, his blue eyes making steely contact with James' own hazel ones. James could do nothing but look Dumbledore directly in the eye and tell the truth.

"I was being a brilliant liar," admitted James, with a sigh. "By that time, I had fallen hopelessly and irrevocably in love with Lily by that point. I'm sorry I had to lie to you but at that point I was lying to everyone. I got caught up in my own and Gwen's lie and I could do nothing but damage control. If Gwen had been telling the truth about the baby, I would have gone through with the wedding and I would have stayed away from Lily for the rest of my life. I don't have to do that now though; the only thing standing in the way of me having a happy life with Lily is my job."

"James, throughout your years at Hogwarts, I was always hoping you would finally grow up and be mature," said Dumbledore with a small smile. "Because I knew that would be the only way for you to get Lily to finally say yes to you. I'm also going to let you know that when you departed ways the first time all those years ago, I was disappointed that it didn't last. Love is very important, especially in the bad times like this; I hope this time you don't let it go."

"You- you're not- you're not angry we're together?" asked Lily timidly, confusion apparent in her eyes. James raised an eyebrow in bemusement, but stayed silent. After all, he didn't want Dumbledore to change his mind.

"I'm disappointed that it happened this way," concluded Dumbledore, his blue eyes twinkling behind the half moon glasses once more. "I, like everybody else, was under the impression that Miss Barker was pregnant, which is why tried to make sure you two weren't together. At the start of the year, she may not have been 'pregnant' but you still had a responsibility towards her and I didn't want you to forget that, James, in your rush to be with your heart's desire. I know you have been deceived and tricked; if you hadn't you may not have acted this way, but you did. It was the wrong way to behave."

"I know that, and I'm sorry," apologised James. "I left little thought to Gwen, and if she had been telling the truth and news of Lily and I had come out, you would have had every right to be angry, disappointed... ashamed even."

"Ohhh let the poor lad be," said a booming voice in the corner to the right of James. He looked round to see a portrait of a wizard with a big handlebar moustache. James couldn't help but laugh a little.

"Erm, thanks for the support," said James with a weak smile.

"James, whilst you did act wrong, happiness in these dark times is rare so I'm glad you have found it," smiled Dumbledore. "Miss Barker, acted horribly towards you and I'm glad you are better off without her, it just would have been better if you had discovered that before you came to teach at Hogwarts. I sincerely hope the two of you will be staying on for the rest of the year."

A hand touched his shoulder making him jump slightly at the unexpected touch. He looked down to see Lily by his side with a huge smile on her glowing face. He grabbed her hand off from his shoulder and held it in his larger, rougher one. Whilst his thumb caressed her soft skin, his lips formed a large grin.

"I believe the Hall has erupted into an impromptu engagement party," chuckled Dumbledore. "Congratulations."

James never did see the look of pride and love on his parents' faces or the smile and twinkle that Dumbledore possessed. Nor did he hear the congratulations from the portraits that lived in the dimly lit antechamber.

Only the feel of Lily's lips on his, the warmth and love radiating from her, and rush of happiness coursing through him as her lips curled into a smile under his had his attention. It seemed they would hold his attention far better than anything else ever would from now on.

A/N: Well that is the last official chapter of Strictly Forbidden so I would like to thank everyone who has reviewed and read it  Also let me know in your review if you would like to see an epilogue for this story! I have an idea for one but it depends whether you want it.


	37. Chapter 37

Epilogue

A small smile flittered across James' face as he entered the living room of the Potter Mansion. The smell of pine wafted under his nose, and he saw the majestic Christmas tree in the corner of the room. The Potter's were having a small Christmas this year; and a more homely feel was definitely felt in the house. No grand parties or an extravagant decor for them- in fact, the star hovering above the Christmas tree was made by his own hands. Granted, it did take him three hours.

This was the sort of Christmas James appreciated these days. When he was younger he loved going to parties and being the 'belle' of the ball (although of course a much more masculine belle). Now he was twenty four, he was at the point in his life where he wanted to be settled. He had everything he wanted: and the fact it was Christmas in a couple of days was just the icing on the cake.

The large family portrait that hung above the mantelpiece and dominated the room was what initially made James smile. It no longer held the painting of his cheeky thirteen year old self. The shoulders had broadened, his height had towered, his jaw strengthened, and the chubby cheeks had vanished. He was a man now. A man with a woman. The portrait version of Lily had a twinkle in her eye as she aimed a wide smile in his direction before turning to portrait James and kissing him firmly on the lips. Portrait James smiled warmly at his portrait partner – he only had eyes for her.

"I like that portrait more than the other," said a feminine voice from the doorway.

Lily was leaning against the doorframe with a gorgeous smile to match her portrait counterpart. She was wearing a pair of dark pink and black checked thin cotton pyjama bottoms and a dark pink camisole with a thin, black silky dressing gown loosely tied around her hips.

"Because there's an extra addition of you?"

"Am I really that self centred?" asked Lily, in mock flabbergast. She walked towards him, standing beside him to look at the portrait. The portrait version of his parents waved at the pair of them.

"Of course not," replied James. "Is it because I just look so irresistibly sexy on this one?"

"Well I know I'm not self centred but I can't really dismiss that fact about you," joked Lily.

"Okay so if it's not my irresistible sexiness, then what is it?" chuckled James, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"Your version of yourself in the old portrait used to wolf whistle me every time I came into the lounge on my own," admitted Lily, a faint blush arising in her cheeks.

"I can imagine," grinned James. "I think I'm much more mature in the new portrait though."

"And I like that a lot more," said Lily, looking at the portrait to James and back again.

"You don't mind that we're spending our first Christmas as a married couple with my family, do you?"

"I love that we're spending it with the people that mean the most to us," smiled Lily. "I wouldn't want it any other way. As long as you're by my side I don't care who else is there."

"Ahhh so you don't mind if my new girlfriend comes for Christmas dinner then?" asked James with a cheeky grin. He ducked as Lily playfully tried to slap the side of his head. "I'll take that as a no then."

"I don't think she'd get along with my boyfriend, you see," grinned Lily.

"Oh so I'm not man enough for you then," chuckled James. "And here I thought that I was the only man for you."

"You are the only man for me," said Lily softly. "You always have been."

"Hey, you two!" exclaimed Sirius, standing in the doorway with Rory. "We all know you're all loved up but we'd really appreciate it if you'd come to the kitchen for breakfast. We're having Christmas Eve waffles but you're mum won't give us any until you're there."

"And we're really hungry," laughed Rory. It was weird to see how well the two of them fitted together. With their shiny black hair and clear, light eyes they were practically identical. He looked at Lily and she shared a smile with him, knowing she was thinking the same thing. Merlin, they were even equally obsessed with food.

"Don't worry, we'll be there in a minute," said James with a nod of his head.

"We promise," smiled Lily.

"You best be," warned Sirius. "Otherwise I'm coming back here to eat you."

With a pretend menacing laugh and a well positioned hand on Rory's lower back, Sirius left James and Lily on their own again.

"Weren't we just saying how happy we was to be having Christmas with him?" chuckled James sarcastically. "If he's not sufficiently occupied then he whines like a little baby."

"Just think; next Christmas we'll have one of our very own," said Lily warmly, placing her hand on her flat stomach.

"Are you sure this one's real?" asked James, with a mischievous grin. "Cause I can never be too careful with these things."

Lily grabbed one of his hands and pressed it against her stomach and looked up to him with what he could only describe as tender love and adoration in her eyes.

"I know it's still flat, but our child is growing in there," smiled Lily, leaning up to press her lips to his. "We made that happen out of our love."

"I know," said James gently, resting his forehead against hers with his hand still on her tummy. "I just want you to know that you and this baby are the two most important things in my life. We are living in a dangerous times but I swear to you I will do everything in my power to protect you and our child."

"Please don't talk like that, James," urged Lily. "Our family will be fine, I know that."

"I want more than anything for that to be true," smiled James. "Because I love you."

"I love you too, you're my forever."

James smiled. He knew he'd found his forever too.

A/N: Wow, I can't believe this story is really over. I'd just like to thank everybody who stuck to reading this story and to thank anyone who ever will read this. It was my first story, my first baby really, so it feels very strange to never again be writing on it. I'll miss it! I hope people have enjoyed reading it and will hopefully review and check out my other stories too.

Lots of Love,

LadyLush xxx


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